Monday 31 December 2007

Send one to yourself

For the year 2007, my resolution was to start a blog and maintain it. I think I have done considerably well; with a lot of effort I must say. I hope I will have the energy and time to continue this adventure beyond 2007. We shall see.

Anyway, for the new year; I would like to suggest that you do this simple exercise. All you have to do is to write a letter to yourself. Yes, a letter, the traditional version, one which relies on the forgotten ancient way of snail mail.

The content of the letter could be anything. Of course, most will prefer to write about your resolution for the coming year but you can also write about something deeper; perhaps your view of life at the moment. Perhaps you are in a state of confusion or in a situation where you intend to make choices, you could write about your deep inner feelings. After all, the letter will be read only by you. So really… it could be anything at all.

After you have written it, sealed it in an envelope completely and address the letter to yourself. Preferably, you should also affix the appropriate stamps required for the letter to the delivered to you.

How is the letter going to be delivered then? This is the interesting part……

You are to pass this letter to a friend, one whom you trust. Seriously, you really need to trust this person because not only must this person not read your letter. He or she must also remember to post this letter to you next year. You may set a different date but I think one year from now is pretty sufficient.

Trust me; you will be very surprise to receive the letter one year later. Best effect can be achieved when you have totally forgotten that you have written such a letter. And yes, though you think you will remember it, most of you would have forgotten you have written such a letter.

This letter-to-thyself exercise is very good for graduates. If you are graduating soon, write a letter to yourself with the dreams and vision you would like to achieve upon entering the working world. Reading your dreams and vision one year after can be a revelation, trust me on this.

Some tips on how to write a good piece would be of course, be honest with yourself. Another very interesting element is ‘feeling’. What do you feel about things right now? Be in touch with yourself, and you will be thrilled with the end result.

The most important thing is to pass to someone whom you trust and one who will send the letter back to you next year. Best if this someone is one whom you seldom meet.

This is by far one of the best things you can do for yourself for the new year. It’s also relatively easy. So what are you waiting for? Start writing now… trust me… it’s very fulfilling…

Happy New Year to you all…!

Thursday 27 December 2007

Are you prepared?

One of the things which hit me as the year comes to an end is the multitude of complaints and rants on how screwed up this country is. But seriously, if this country takes a turn for the better, are you prepared to live the life which you claim you desire?

When you are stopped by the police for speeding or any other offences, there will be no more immediate-discounted-settlement scheme. When you are stopped by the police for driving under the influence of alcohol, you WILL land yourself in the lock-up and face trial. This would mean you will pay a hefty fine with a potential jail term.

Are you prepared?

There will be no more cutting of queue while taking a turn at a junction. There will most probably be a lot of zebra crossings which you MUST stop when pedestrians are crossing. You can no longer switch lane conveniently at those double-lined lanes which you have been doing everyday. You must drive 40km/h as soon as you see such speed limit even in an empty road.

Are you prepared?

You might not be able to drive alone in your nice car anymore as Single-Occupant-Vehicle is prohibited to reduce traffic congestion. This would definitely cost you your convenience. You will most probably be taking public transport in most of your travels, improved public transport nonetheless. You MUST queue when entering public transport.

Are you prepared?

There will be much difficulties in having mamak sessions as they are no longer allowed to place their tables beyond their designated restaurant area. This also includes some coffee shops. All those Chinese eateries operating under the tree, next to the road or beside the train will be completely gone as they do not satisfy the minimum cleanliness requirement.

Are you prepared?

Prices of property will be rocketed sky high as foreign workers population is significantly reduced which contributed to increase in cost. This is on top of the costly materials used to guarantee that properties are “Act-Of-God”-proof. Proper security at gated communities also means you will have to be properly registered when entering such areas and details have to be verified against your identification.

Are you prepared?

And what about… no more pirated DVDs. No more pirated software. No more pirated computer or play-station games. No more fake watches and accessories. No more cheap computers. No more cheap “AP phones”.

Are you prepared?

The above are just some things which will most probably materialise if our country is to leap from the current dismal state to true 1st world scenario. Do add if you can think of any other scenarios we should be prepared for.

But… do we have the 1st world mentality to cope? Are we seriously prepared?




Monday 24 December 2007

What’s your ‘X’ this Xmas?

When I was young, I always wonder what exactly is ‘Xmas’. Yeah, we all know it stands for the celebration on 25th December but why Xmas instead of the actual spelling of… Christmas? Do you all know why? Are you all curious?

From what I understand, the ‘x’ in the Xmas equation is akin to the ‘x’ in algebra. It simply means the ‘x’ in the Xmas equation can be anything you want it to be. Yes, if you think Xmas is the short-form of Christmas, you're wrong...

Christmas is spelt as “Christ”-mas because it is the date of the birth of Jesus Christ, which made 25th December a religious festival. Christ is the centre of it all. But the world has commercialised the day so extravagantly that it became nothing more than a season to let loose ourselves to shop, eat and party.

Therefore, Xmas to you can be shoppingmas, or perhaps feastmas, or to some… holidaymas. That is what the world wants Christmas to be. But yet, amidst it all, Christmas is the most unique religious celebration of all. Why? That’s probably a discussion for another day.

Today, I want to say that Christ is still the X for my Xmas… it is still Christmas to me. And I want to wish all Christian readers a very Blessed Christmas.

What the ‘X’ for your Xmas?

Friday 21 December 2007

Marriage brownies points

The latest poll was by far the most popular one, with a total of 374 votes. Looks like boobs is the best way to address breast according to most of you all. But I am surprise that ‘nen nen’ came second! Right… boobs it is…

Very soon, I will be entering marriage life. Well actually, I am already legally married so what happen next year is the church solemnisation process. I received these guidelines on how to make a your woman happy quite some time ago and I wonder if they are really applicable…

SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) in the rain (+8)
But return with beer (-5)
You check out a suspicious noise at night (+1)
You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
It's her pet (-20)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS
You stay by her side the entire party (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a uni buddy (-2)
Named Angelina(-10)
Angelina is a dancer (-20)
Tina has silicon implants (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY
You take her out to dinner (+2)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+3)
Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT
You take her to a movie (+1)
You take her to a movie she likes (+3)
You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
You take her to a movie you like (-2)
It's called ‘Alien vs Predator 2’ (-3)
You lied and said it was a romantic comedy (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE
You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Batik shirts (-30)
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)

THE BIG QUESTION
She asks, "Do I look fat?"… this one, you lose points no matter what...
You hesitate in responding (-10)
You reply, "Where?"(-35)
Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
She realises this is because you have fallen asleep (-4000)

I watch a comedy lately and there was this part where the comedian mentioned one of the phrase of the wedding vow called “till death do us part”… he said you could actually be setting a goal… hahahaha!… Any words of wisdom from married couple out there?

Happy weekend everyone…
P/S: For those heading to 1U during evening this weekend, if you see a guy playing a guitar somewhere there..........

Thursday 20 December 2007

Do you believe in miracle?

After a series of horror stories, perhaps it is time to have a look at some inspiring miracles which happened in the past. I am sure such stories are appropriate considering that Christmas is just around the corner. And since Christmas is around the corner, I guess it is even more appropriate to have a look at one amazing Christian miracle…

There was a young man who hailed from Germany. He had a big passion in doing God’s work and thus, he enrolled himself in a missionary school. It is a place where he hoped to be groomed to be a powerful servant of God.

Having graduated, he was sent to the land of Africa to be a preacher in a small town there. The whole scenario was not exactly what he hoped to be. He was pastoring a very small church where the congregation can hardly be considered a crowd. But with a heart for God, he soldiered on.

Years past and his church never seemed to grow. Naturally, he began to feel dejected and began to question God why he has been sent in a remote land. He wanted to do something incredible but he just couldn’t do so. He asked God to give him a big chance.

One day, when he almost calls it quit, he decided to organise a big rally in the big city in the country he was in. But then again, he was not a very famous preacher and surely, he will not be able to attract a good crowd. Further, even if there was a big crowd, he has never preached to a congregation of such before. He thought he could never do it. Hence, he tried to invite a famous speaker to preach at the rally; and he managed to do so.

The day came when the rally was to be held and this pastor was feeling really excited. Though he was not going to preach, he was happy to have organised such an event. Just as the rally was about to start, he got a phone call from the famous speaker who was supposed to preach that day. It was bad news, the speaker was not well and will not be able to make it.

“Why don’t you speak instead?” the famous speaker said.
“I don’t think you can do it”
“Just pray and ask God for his guidance”

And so, he was left with no choice but to take centre stage that day. As he walked up the stairs to the stage, he could felt his knees almost buckled under him. But he dug deep into his courage reserve and managed to drag himself to face the crowd. As he looked at the crowed… he saw thousands and thousands of people, looking at him; expecting something.

For a while, he stood there not knowing what to do; he could not even begin. Since he did not know what to say, he decided to just pray hoping that God will speak and not him. And thus, he bowed down his head, closed his eyes and began to pray. He tried to pro-long his prayer so that he does not need to face the crowd.

A few minutes into the prayer… it began to rain.

“This must be the worst day of my life”… He thought to himself as he could hear people began to leave due to the rain. But he didn’t give up; he continued to pray and asked God to stop the rain. What happened?
The rain got heavier… and heavier… and heavier… and he could hear more and more people leaving the rally.

When the finally finished his prayer… he opened his eyes… all he could see was an empty space in front of him. Those who came were all gone; he was the only person left there…

It was then when he looked to the heaven and a big smile came upon his face. He know he has done something amazing that night… he has finally been able to deliver God’s powerful message…

Why?

Well… 9 lorries were deployed to collect all the walking sticks and wheelchairs and mattresses that were left behind. The thousands who came were those who were limps, those who were sick and bedridden, those who were wheelchair bound… and when the rain came, the thousands who came just got up and started running.

The name of the pastor is Reinhard Bonnke (hope the spelling is accurate). Since that fateful day, he became a very powerful missionary who performed many wonders in the land of Africa.

Another outrageous story? Well, only if you choose not to believe it. And hey… isn’t this world filled with outrageous stories?

Wednesday 19 December 2007

The fear evolution

40 years age…
After that most horrific incident in the nation’s history…
Everyone was in fear.

20 years ago…
After the arrest of many activists under this thing called
Weed Operation
Most were in fear, but some were in anger.

10 years ago…
Some dude held out a weapon and started shouting…
Half were in fear… half were in anger…

Present…
The sword of ISA is wielded again…
Some still in fear… most are in anger

10 years down the road…
???

Related evolution…
The reason evolution

Monday 17 December 2007

A prostitution charity and a twisted fortune telling

It has been a really long time since I did an ARK check. So how is everyone doing with you ARK? Over the last few weeks, I have been very consistent with my morning prayer. And I have been praying for some other people besides me. I guess that’s ARK right?

Anyway, I stumbled upon a story that redefines ARK entirely. It does make one wonders, must good deeds fall within the ambit of ‘appropriateness’?

The name is Maria Carolina. Her game is love… making love; and she does it professionally. Maria is a prostitute plying her trade in Chile, a country where adult prostitution is legal. And in the recent annual fund raising campaign in Chile, Maria auctioned out 27 hours of her ‘professional’ time.

The result is $4,000 raised for charity. Not bad if you asked me… err… the money I mean. And her remark on her charitable feat was…
“I’ve already auctioned off 27 hours of love” . Well, like the saying goes… Make love, not war. What more if you can do some charity while at it?

What do you think about that as an ARK?

Just to digress a little… did you read the mainstream newspaper today? Maybe someone there read about my fortune telling experience and decided to turn their paper into a fortune telling book too. Have a look at this…
Can’t see? This is what that is written on the printed version of the paper…
Naturally, the
online version showed a different date. Was it fortune telling? Was it a…ya’ know… a regular comics “mainstream’s news”? Or was it really just a mistake?

I dunno… you tell me.

Don’t bother about inflation?

When the inflation rate was released a few months ago; as usual, only those social-political bloggers and perhaps some activists were making noise about how inaccurate it is and how the figure has been suppressed to create a ‘feel good’ factor amongst the rakyat. And as always, a lot of us didn’t really care. Our ‘tidak apa’ attitude was just so apparent.

Anyway, the rates published were…
For the year 2005/2006, the published inflation rate was 3.6% and for 2007, the inflation rate is 1.9% so far. There are some quarters which debated that the inflation rate is much higher. Would you agree?

The value-for-money and yet delicious pork noodles near my house increased its price from RM3.50 to RM4.00 per bowl recently. RM4.00 for a bowl of noodles may still be considered reasonable in the area that I stay in but the increase stands at 14.2% nonetheless. Then there is the very famous “pan mee” store near my house which increased its price from RM6 per bowl (for big portion) to RM6.50. That is an increase of 8.3%.

It is very obvious, to me at least, that the inflation rate is much higher than 1.9% for 2007. 1.9%? The more I look at the figure, the more I feel ridiculed by it. But like I said, many of us couldn’t care less. So what if it’s not overly accurate? Doesn’t really matter to you right?

WRONG!!!

Do you know that there are many companies out there, particularly Multi-National Corporations which formulate their annual staff increment policy based on inflation rate? A quick check with some of my friends who work in the human resource consulting industry also revealed that annual inflation rate is often used as a base to advice their clients on the appropriate increment.

Now, who are the clients of these human resource consulting firms and companies which formulate staff increment policy based on inflation rate? I don’t know about you but my company is certainly one of those.
You know how you always complain that prices of everything are going up except for your salary? Well, since many of you don’t give a damn about national inflation statistics… guess you can forget about appropriate increment, if you get any at all.

Anyway, just to digress…
Again? It’s getting too easy…

Friday 14 December 2007

A sight in the gym

The ‘canoe scratching creature’ was indeed quite a horrifying sight. Some suggested that it could be a prank. Well, like I said… the way it turned showed that the creature is not a he or a she but an “it”. Damn, I am reminded again of that sight as I type this in the middle of the night alone!

Anyway, I saw another horrifying sight today… and it happened… in the gym… Right, I am sure you all know what it is related right?

It goes like this… and I have to warn you that it can be quite predictable… oh well…

After finishing my regular workout, I went to the locker room (as usual)… stripped and wrapped myself in a towel. I then proceed to the sauna for a nice relaxation time.

Now, there is this particular shower cubicle which I prefer to the rest. This is the cubicle right at the end of the bathroom area. The reason why I prefer this cubicle is because of its location. Being at the end means there is less ‘traffic’ outside the shower curtain. I just don’t feel safe when there are so many people walking outside my cubicle. I am sure you know what I mean.

Back to the sauna…

When I am in the sauna, I like to sit at this particular spot where I can actually look through the window at the door right to my favourite shower cubicle. No no no no… I am not trying to peep anyone for goodness sake. I will usually leave the sauna when that cubicle is empty.

So today I was sitting there, at the same spot overlooking my favourite cubicle. I was all ready to go and waiting for it to be emptied. A guy came out from the cubicle and I thought, great… my turn to shower. Then I noticed something… there was still a towel hanging outside the cubicle… and the shower curtain was still closed.

True enough… about 2 minutes after that… another guy walked out.

What a horrifying sight… and I didn’t shower in that cubicle today… lest I want to step on some… remnants…
Other previous gym encounters… for those who want to have a good laugh before the weekend…

A locker tale

When he was on top and I was at the bottom

The almost being-picked-up situation

P/S: Anyone not voted in the poll yet?

Wednesday 12 December 2007

Will this point hit you?

I know we are all high on supernatural stories lately and the momentum is strong. But let us pause for a moment at look at what is happening around us… just for a while…

I spoke to a few of my friends about rally yesterday (yes, there was one in case you’re unaware) and we were talking about things are seriously wrong in this country, how the mainstream media is taking us for fools and how this country is slowly but surely redefining the term ‘human rights’.

Anyway, conversation led to the usual point… race issue. Many are of the opinion that the Bersih rally held on 10 November was a Malay affair, though attended by other races. I have to agree. Most Chinese are still hiding quietly that as long as they can place 3 meals on the table, everything is fine. Or is it?

Moving on, the Indians took to the streets under the banner of Hindraf. I am sure not many will disagree that the Hindraf rally was quite entirely an Indian affair. Of course, there are some brave Chinese and Malays who walked with the Indians and for that, I salute you.

The question now is of course, what will the Chinese do? It appears the Chinese are doing nothing and will never do anything; all in accordance to the Chinese saying of…

“Yan 1 si, fong ping long jin. Tui 1 po, hoi fut tin hung”

The above saying simply means tolerance is a virtue. But Chinese are a cunning lot, and I am sure many would agree. While leaving the dirty work to the Malays and Indians, the Chinese are also slowly doing something. This view is supported by RPK of the famous Malaysia Today website. What are the Chinese doing?

The Chinese are slowly (or perhaps hastily)… moving away. All my friends who have migrated are all Chinese. 90% of those in the process of moving away (including yours truly)… are Chinese. So what are the Chinese doing? They simply move away. This is very real, as shown in the Chinese depreciating population. This even resulted in
a call for Chinese to fuck more so that there will be more Chinese babies.

And it hit me!!!

Ya’ know… those of you Chinese who are living in your wonderful dreamland that as long as you can place 3 meals on the table, don’t rock the boat… those of you who are staying behind because you love this country so much and that those 3 meals you place on the table are not any other food but delicious Malaysian food… you know those kind of Chinese?

Have you ever thought… that in 15 or 20 years time… when majority of the Chinese have left the country… when the 60% population majority becomes say; 90% majority… that will be the time when your children would become adult. That would mean that your children will be out to hunt for a partner… or being hunted. What does that mean?

It means there is a 90% chance (or more) that your children will end up with the majority population. No disrespect, I have nothing against inter-racial marriage. But the complication falls on the religion factor, which I do not need to elaborate further.

Have you ever thought of the chance your children will come back with someone of a different faith? One which makes conversion compulsory?

I highlighted this point to a friend of mine who just had a baby girl. He will be seeing a migration agent next week.

P/S: Zewt would like to apologise if this entry offended anyone.

Tuesday 11 December 2007

When the fortune teller failed to tell my fortune

The future, no matter how bleak it is, is still fascinating. The thought of knowing what is going to happen, perhaps just a glimmer; is enough to intrigue any wandering soul.

You may not proclaim to be a fortune telling enthusiast but have you ever catch a glimpse of the horoscope in the newspaper and actually keep a lookout to see if things happen as mentioned throughout the day? Or have you ever take a look at those fortune telling forwarded mails and see if it’s true?

I am not a fan of fortune telling in any form. I believe it is a thing where you will fulfil the prophecy yourself. Also, I believe that my future lies not within the stars or books or cards but in the hands of the Almighty. Of course, many would disagree; and I would accept with an open mind.

Following my birth, my Mom took my ‘si san 8 ji’ (date and time of birth) and apparently went to a famous fortune teller to seek counsel; my Mom wanted to know my dos and don’ts. Mom came back with 1 pointer… zewt ‘gei sui’ (avoid water). Thus began my Mom effort is protecting me from water ranging from a small pail to a pond to the ocean.

Needless to say, ‘swimming’ is forbidden. But at the age of 14, I learnt swimming behind my parents’ back. And the result? I am currently the only person in my family who can swim properly. Some may be saying that the fortune teller whom my Mom went to was a fake. But then again, if I got a near-drown experience in my first swimming lesson, wouldn’t all those who believe in fortune telling begin to sing praises and go…”See, it’s true!”

How fickle we can be…

Anyway, the best fortune telling fiasco came when I was about 17……

By then, my Mom is a devotee in this temple near my house where she congregated rather frequently. She was then introduced to a very peculiar way of fortune telling; one which function by way of looking through a series of books in a very special library. You go to the fortune teller with the relevant ‘date and time of birth’ and the medium will obtain a book from the library. The book will depict the life of that person from beginning… till the end. It was said to be very… very … very accurate.
My Mom came back one day feeling rather disturbed. Yes, she went to consult this so called book-reading-fortune-teller. She was not only asking for my fortune, but the fortune of my entire family. She was going on and on about how accurate it is, about how certain significant events in our lives were accurately depicted in the relevant books. Apparently, the book can even tell what year which event happened… and in which year what event will happen in the future. Very impressive… or scary, depending on the way you see it.

One thing though… my Mom seemed ‘disturbed’ about me. She then said the book depicted my life quite accurately too. The injuries I got when I was young, those significant events… all accurately depicted. But she said one thing…

“13 sui ji hao, lei jau chut pin” (Once you reach 13, you’re on the outside)

Apparently the fortune telling panicked because when it was my turn, the supposedly all knowing book turned empty when I reached 13-year-old. The fortune teller couldn’t explain it. My fortune could not be told post-13 year old. And the fortune teller cannot just pick another book because that was my book. The only explanation provided was… I am on the outside.

The million dollar question is… what happened when I was 13? Why can't my they tell my fortune after I reached the age of 13? Well…











13 was the age I became a Christian.

My very own encounter

After all the stories which came from my friends, I guess the time is right for me to share one of my own. It was not my original intention to share this as the experience has got no morale behind it but I guess we are all in for the thrill isn’t it?

It was the year 1993; the actual date could be around 6 November. I can pin-point the date to this level of accuracy as I am now staring at the photo. I see a lot of faces. It is the group photo for the course I attended in Outward Bound School (“OBS”) in 1993 and it has the date printed in the photo.

OBS is an international non-profit educational organisation which trains participants about social survival in a series of outdoor activities. The OBS in Malaysia is located in Lumut, Perak. All participants are to go through medical check and be certified as fit before they are admitted. Further, participants are to sign on a declaration which says that any unfortunate event is not the responsible of OBS. Basically, if you die, it’s your problem.

And indeed, plenty has died in OBS due to its tough activities. With the OBS in Lumut being a very old institution, it was believed that the place is very haunted. I remember the dormitory that I stayed in; there was no partition between the beds and the bathroom. If you are lying on the bed and you turn to side facing the bathrooms, you can see dark cubicles next to each other. When it’s dark and you are in the dormitory up the hill… trust me… it is quite a horrifying sight.

Anyway, one of the activities we had to do was to canoe from Lumut across to Pangkor. If I remember correctly, we started our journey at 8.30am, we reached Pangkor past 12pm. That is 3.5 hours of non-stop canoeing. It was fun in the first few minutes. But by the time you are in the middle of Lumut and Pangkor, you just feel as though you can die. I remember I got out from my canoe and fell flat on the beach as soon as I reached Pangkor beach, no longer able to feel my arms. Oh yeah… we had to canoe to other side of Pangkor, the side facing the Straits of Mallaca.

Oh, one of the activities I have to complete was this thing called ‘solo camp’ which means you go to the jungle alone and camp there… alone… overnight. It was one of the bravest things I have ever done in my life.

I have digressed… time to go to the juicy stuff…

It was a very long beach and we parked our canoes on one side and strange enough, we were asked to pit our tents about 200m away from the canoe parking area. After a series of activities, night time came and guys are to do night watch. Girls just sleep. Oh yeah, there are girls and there are some really funny stories, perhaps another time.

Me and my friend were in charged of the watch some time past midnight. We were both very tired and 2 guys sitting under the star was certainly not the most romantic thing to do. And so, we decided to take a walk.

We decided to head to the kitchen area which was quite deep into the campsite. Reason? We heard some guys saying that they “saw something” in there and we tried to be adventurous. We saw nothing, only pots and pails of water and tent with can food. Though we saw nothing, the sight of everything in stillness in the middle of the night inside the jungle can be quite… eerie…

Feeling disappointed, we decided to look for ‘more fun’. I suggested that we check out the canoe parking area which was 200m away. My friend agreed. After all, we had nothing to do. And off we went…with out torch-lights in our hands…

It seemed like we reached the area in no time. With our lights shinning all over the place, we could only see canoes stacked on top of each other. There was nothing. And so, we decided to walk back. As soon as we turned to head back, I heard a sound, a very strange one. It’s like someone is scratching something.

“lei thang do mo?” (did you hear that?) I asked.

My friend didn’t reply me and turned around to face the source of the sound, so did I. The sound came again… syiak… at that time; our lights were pointing the group. Our natural instinct led us to shine our torch-lights at the source of the sound.

What we saw was a figure, in white… with it’s back facing us… with long hair. It was scratching one of the canoe but when we pointed our lights to it, the thing stopped and began to turn… slowly. Why I refer the thing as ‘it’? It’s because the thing was not of this world… the way it turned showed that it was not of this world.

Me and my friend did not wait for the thing to turn and face us. I still remember our reaction. We turned and looked at each other at the exact same time… and at the exact same time, we sprinted back to our campsite as fast as we could. We never talked nor told anyone until the next day.

Monday 10 December 2007

Monday light read

When I mentioned that one of my interests was cooking in the ‘talking to the dead’ entry, some readers seemed astonished. Yes, I love to blog but I like to cook too, just that I don’t have time to do it. In fact, I have blogged several times about some of my cuisine before.

Anyway, after a week of horror stories, perhaps it’s time to lighten up a bit. Enjoy another round of zewt’s cuisine…
My usual dish; fried oyster mushroom with ‘cili padi’. I can eat this everyday and won't be bored of it.
The simple fried ‘siew bak choy’ in soya sauce. Looks fresh, no?


This is the first time I am cooking sweet and sour chicken. Turned out quite, better than I expected. Jules had a great dinner and packed some for lunch the day after.

P/S: Anyone want more super-natural stories?

Friday 7 December 2007

Guess the blooper...

Recent entries of AZAIG have been rather creepy till some dare not read it in the middle of the night. Well, you don’t know what you are missing, those are true accounts of supernatural phenomena. Hey… I am sure all of you have gone through that let’s-talk-ghost-story when you’re at a trip or at come camps right?

Anyway, Friday is here and nothing is better than a good dosage of laughter. So let us all take a break away from those horror stories and I certainly would not want to make this a creepy Friday.

I don’t watch porn. Well, let me rephrase… I have stopped watching porn since the longest time. I remember a girl forwarded porn stuff to me while I was still at a
Magic School and I actually admonished her nicely. She thought I was joking and trying to act holy. But she was in shock when she found out from some of my male colleagues that I really don’t watch porn. Pretty hard to believe but … oh well…

Then words got around that I am actually… gay, which is also not true… double oh well…

But I received a forwarded video clip and the message in that mail was… “just watch till the end…”. I opened the clip and it was indeed a porn clip. Rather holistic I must say as the guy kept going…”oh god oh god”. The girl totally agreed that the guy was holistic as she kept going…”oh yeah… oh yeah”.

Not long after that, the guy probably reached the peak of his holiness when he pulled out his dick and starting shouting… “oh godddddddd….arghhhhh…”. The camera was really focusing on this ‘tool’ when he reached his peak and naturally, the up and down motion of his hand
resulted in a few shots of white lotion

Then… all of a sudden… the camera focus was shifted to the ground… moved all over the place and I could hear the cameraman said…

“Oh fuck… fucking hell… get a tissue!!!... get me a tissue quick”

What do you think happened?

Thursday 6 December 2007

Talking to the dead

Cole was a very nice former uni-mate of mind. We became quite close in our final year in London due to our common interest in… cooking. Through my conversation with him, found out that he comes from a family where the father is a former high priest who used to practise black magic. He once told me that monks coming from Thailand will go visit his father whenever they are in town. Cool huh...

But things became ugly one day when the spirits that his father ‘kept’ turned against the family. I would love to share the story, which is an exciting one. But out of respect for Cole, I can only conclude that the unfortunate incident led to the whole family becoming Christians. Sorry guys, there are just some things which I just shouldn’t write about.

Anyway, Cole has a brother called James, and they are very close. And I mean… very close. The bond between them is very strong. Unfortunately, James died a tragic death when Cole was still in his teens. It was classified as murder but the police never solved the case. Well, it’s our beloved police so…

Stuck in between his new found faith in Christ and the desire to know how James died, Cole went back to the ways his father used to practise. He went to look for a medium in his quest to talk to the dead… to talk to his brother… to talk to James… he went ‘man mai’ (directly translated as ‘ask rice’)…

This phenomenon is quite a freaky thing, one which my Mom told me she has been to a few times. You will go to the medium with the name, date of birth, time of birth, date of death, time of death and other relevant information of the person you want to speak to and it is believed that the medium will travel to the underworld to look for that person, usually a relative. Once found, the medium will allow the dead to possess the medium’s body and the seeker can then talk to the dead through the medium.

So Cole went to see the medium and after giving her (yes, it’s usually an old lady) the relevant information, she performed the ritual and true enough, she found James from the underworld and let James possess her body… and talk to Cole.

This is how Cole described the experience…

~~Zewt, it was just so real. Suddenly, you wonder if Christianity is real. She (the medium) was a lady but she could talk exactly like James. She even spoke in James’ voice! And she suddenly will sit the way James sat. It was really like I was talking to James. Just that ‘he’ appeared in the form of the medium, who was an old lady~~

The medium could speak like the dead… act like the dead and… possessed the voice of the dead, one which the medium has not heard before. Cole then told me that the medium could tell of the place James died, and the sequence of events which led to his death… what he did that day… all accurately described according to Cole’s knowledge. It was truly an amazing thing.

One very peculiar thing though… the information which Cole seeks most… “the person responsible for James’ death”… that information was never revealed. “James” just said he passed out and did not know what happened next.

Regardless of whether Cole achieved his objective or not, would you consider such medium as fake? Would you think that everything was just a show? It will make one ask oneself about life and death isn’t it?

Though Cole never discovered who the real killer was, he actually went back to the medium several times, just to speak to ‘James’ as Cole misses him very much. Cole wanted to talk to his brother. The love for his brother supersedes his faith.

Interesting isn’t it? For Christian readers… how do we explain all this?

This is the part where Zewt, being a Christian will explain how that is possible based on his knowledge. You will most probably find it outrages. But then again, isn’t what you read already outrages?

Christians believe that evil spirits roam the earth freely. These are minions of satan, former angels who rebelled against God with satan a former chief angel himself. Their job is to make sure you don’t believe in Christ. And since these evil spirits are former angels, they do possess some form of power.

So when Cole spoke to “James” through the medium, it is not James. It is one of the spirits who has been following Cole and James all these while, who knows how they grew up, who knows how they live their life, one who possesses power to change voice, or other things within its means. It is such spirit who took over the medium’s body.

Plainly said, consider that spirit Cole’s guardian devil, one placed with him since his birth to screw up his life. But Cole is not alone. You and I have one too.

Outrages isn’t it? Not quite. If you have read books from this author called
Rebecca Brown, it’s 10 times more outrages. And as for us, we can only rely on our faith to discern between what is right and what is wrong.

Tuesday 4 December 2007

Supernatural solutions

Like I mentioned yesterday, some wanted to know the actual ending of the story I shared the day before. Well, to be honest with you, the reason why I did not finish the story in the first place was I was afraid I might offend some people. But I am sure many of you are all open minded people so… here goes...

Mary was recovering well after the deliverance when her aunt came and visited the family. Needless to say, the story was made known to her aunt. Mary’s aunt, trying to be safe, then brought Mary to a temple and asked for a ‘fu’ for Mary. For those who don’t know, a ‘fu’ is a yellow piece of paper usually folded into a triangle which is believed to have been blessed and protect the bearer from evil.

Mary, being the naïve girl she is; took the ‘fu’ and that night itself… the moth returned. My friend immediately brought her to see the pastor and when asked “what is your name?” again by the pastor, Mary trembled… grabbed a pen and wrote down… 7 names… 7 different names.

She had to go through a second round of deliverance which was again, a very long process. Someone commented that Mary should have seen a Taoist instead for a “faster cure”. Well, it appears not, at least not in this case. In fact, seeking the counsel made it worse for Mary.

When it comes of supernatural situations, every religion has their own story to tell. You may have heard about how a possessed soul was saved by a pastor or a priest and the other may have seen how a talisman protected a soul from the evil one. The thing is, every religion has got their glory days.

Being amongst Christians most of the time, I am exposed to more deliverance in the Christians manner, and how God over-powered evil spirits with one particular story happened in Genting. Some of these stories are quite incredible and faith boosting.
Then there is this phenomenon where the one can talk to the dead via a Taoist medium, called ‘mun mai’ (directly translated as ask rice). A friend of mine, who is a Christian; actually went to such medium and been through the process before.

How was his experience? Is it real? What’s the Christian explanation behind it? That is a story for tomorrow.

Oh, I just have to share this video with you guys. It’s absolutely hilarious and no matter how many times I watch it, I still laugh at the punch-line. Wanted to wait till Friday before showing this but I just can't wait… have fun…



Monday 3 December 2007

How is this possible?

Some asked me to talk about the second part of the story i shared yesterday. I wanted to do it but my right eye is having a slight infection now so I can't really blog today. Tomorrow perhaps.

Anyway, anyone can explain how is this possible?
Any Einstein here?

Time to sleep for me...

Yes, we do believe...

Warning: This entry may be thought provoking. But I am sure it’s worth it

Many would have known by now that my Mom is a very staunch Buddhist, while I am a Christian. One thing which irritates me and often caused arguments is when my Mom made passing comment to her friends about how Christians do not believe in ghosts. Her favourite phrase was… “Lei dei yat ding em sun yi dit yeh” which simply means… surely, you people don’t believe in such things.

Is that true?

A friend of mine shared a story with me many years ago. It’s something which happened to his sister, so it’s as real as it gets…

My friend’s sister, let’s call her Mary, was waiting for the school bus to arrive after school one day. It was getting very late and the bus seemed to be taking forever. There were 3 of them waiting for the school bus to come and out of boredom and curiosity, one of Mary’s friend suggested that they play a very interesting game. That game was called “Spirit of the coin”.

For those who are unaware, this is a game which involves players ‘inviting’ a spirit to come into a coin. This coin is placed on top of a piece of paper which may consist of numbers or colours or anything which resembles answers. This is because when the spirit enters the coin, the players can then ask questions and the coin will move to the ‘right’ answer on the paper.

Now, this game requires a very strict rule; that is all the players must place their finger on the coin. This is confusing part because when the coin moves, no one knows if it is truly a spirit present or one of the player pushing the coin. But anyway, when players want to end the game, players are to ‘invite’ the spirit to leave the coin before players can release their fingers from the coin.

Back to the story…

Mary and her friends invited the spirit into the coin and they had fun ‘asking’ the spirits. Their game was interrupted when the school bus came and how did the game ended? All of them just release the fingers from the coin and went home.

That night, Mary had difficulty sleeping. She felt that there is something in the room with her. Then she noticed there is a big moth in her room and when the moth rested on the wall, she felt as though there is something watching her. Mary asked her brother, i.e. my friend to help her get the moth away. My friend did that, he chased the moth away.

However, the moth somehow appeared in her room again, almost immediately. After a few rounds of chasing it away, my friends gave up and Mary managed to fall asleep.

This went on for a few days where Mary also fell sick. My friend, who is a Christian, sensed something amidst and decided to take Mary to see our pastor. This is what my friend told me…

~~ As soon as we entered the room, pastor got Mary to sit down, looked straight into her eyes and asked “What is your name?” Immediately after that, Mary started to tremble as though she was not herself. She then grabbed a pen on the table and wrote 4 names on a notebook. 4 different names ~~

Conversation followed between the 4 and pastor and they claimed to be a family of 4 who died at a road accident near Mary’s school. They were “invited” into the coin.

I would like to pause here to highlight that this is not very in line with Christian’s doctrine as Christians believe spirits of the dead will not be wandering around. I shall blog more about this in the very near future.

Anyway, my friend also shared a very defining moment with Mary. It was when she was still in the deliverance process (a.k.a exorcism process) and she couldn’t sleep one night. So my friend took Mary to the living room and let her lie on long sofa while my friend sat on the floor and sang some Gospel songs while playing his guitar, trying to sing Mary to sleep.

After a while, Mary seemed to have fallen asleep and when my friend was about to keep his guitar… Mary opened her eyes, put her hands on my friend’s shoulder and said…

“They are here”

I still remember the exact words of my friend when he told a few of us this… He said…”I have to look down to check if my balls were still there cause I felt as though they dropped off”.

The deliverance process took a very long time. I once heard a ‘self-confession’ from a former uni-mate that her deliverance took 2 years. Yes… 2 long years. This is the part where it is very different from other religion. There are instances where a talisman is given to the possessed and voila, the spirit gone. Am afraid, it doesn’t work that way in Christianity.

Mary was blessed as her deliverance was shorter than that, though still long. However, after her deliverance, something else happened, the story didn’t end there. But that is a story for another day.

So friends, Christians do believe in ghosts too, just that we call them evil spirits. The difference is that Christians are protected by the blood of Christ from these evil spirits and they have no right to touch us unless… unless God himself allows it. Why would God allows it? That is when we give Him a reason to allow it.

A bit deep? Yeah… but the point is… yes, we do believe… in evil spirits.

P/S: Those who wants more dosage of Christian deliverance can have a look at
this story.

Friday 30 November 2007

One for the girls...

I read a blog earlier this week which talks about girls wearing over-sized bra which resulted in guys given full view of those assets when the girls bend down to try out shoes in shoes store. Hmmm… now I know why a lot of guys accompany their partners to shop for shoes. A lot of things to see apparently. *cheeky smile* Forgotten which blog is this, will the blogger in question speak up?

Anyway, I have been posting a lot of hypothetical sexual questions which centres mainly on guys. I am sure a lot of girls enjoyed reading those comments from us guys. To be fair, I think girls should also play some part and share some stories, right guys?

Before I ask the girls the question, I want to share an experience about over-sized bra. No you moron, I didn’t wear one. What were you thinking!?

I was talking to this girl in my former church. She was wearing a rather low-cut spaghetti strap top and her bra was rather… over-sized. She wasn’t bending down or anything, she was just standing in front of me… talking to me. As I am taller than her… I could… errr… see the whole thing, know what I mean…

It was quite an awkward situation because it was very obvious and I was struggling to control my natural instinct as a man and at the same time trying to be a good Christian in the church. And hey… it was rude to actually turn away when someone talks to you right? I know a lot of girls are very sensitive to that. So… what a predicament…

Yes, I have seen many situations where the girls’ top has got a plunging neck-line and at the same time, the vacuum between the bra and her boobs are generous enough to present a rather… pleasant view. Sometimes, it can be awkward, sometimes embarrassing and sometimes… nice…

So the questions to girls here are… and you may want to comment anonymously… what is your worst or most embarrassing ‘exposure’ that you’ve ever had?

Guys, maybe you can also share your “awkward” experience?

P/S: Hmmm… hope no one minds that AZAIG is on high dosage of naughtiness lately…


P/S/S: Have inserted a new poll... do vote ya...

Wednesday 28 November 2007

The ultimate fine dining

I have always wanted a chance to do a review on food but never really got around doing it. Alas, my chance came today when I brought Jules to an exclusive fine dining experience to celebrate her birthday.

It was said that this place is always fully booked during weekend as it carries the reputation of having the finest steak in town. Though today is a weekday, I took no risk and already made my reservation yesterday. Upon arrival, I mentioned my name and was immediately ushered to my table, already nicely set-up for two.

After being shown the menu, we were served with bread, 2 types to be exact. One of it is called focasia and the other… well, I can’t recall. All I can say is, they are really good. I first though Italianies serves the best bread but now, the bar has been raised.
Further, the bread is served with 3 different types of butter, all nicely laid in front of us for our enjoyment. One is spicy, one is original and the other one is honey based, making it sweet. Once combined with the exotic bread, it's just absolutely delicious.
We ordered a Portobello Mushroom Salad to share. The mushrooms are really juicy, cooked to perfection and it can almost melt as soon as you place it in your mouth. We soon realised that a lot of people actually ordered this as starter. Looks like we made the right choice.
Jules had the Lamb Rack. As soon as she cut a piece and placed it in her mouth, her reaction was “mmmmmmmm”. I was like… “sure or not??” and thus she cut a piece and I gave it a try. My reaction? “mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm”… it was just so tender and was indeed, the best lamb I have ever tasted.
I had a 16oz (approximately 450g) of T-bone steak, medium. It’s very difficult to find a place where they can really cook according to your requirement but this place did it. As you cut through the meat, you can see a nice layer of pink and it was very juicy. However, it was not exactly the best I have ever tasted for this one. Nevertheless, the specialty of this place lies in the sauce, which they gave us 3 selections because I was not sure which to choose. Once the taste of the sauce blends with the steak, then I must say, it was quite good. Oh, the asparagus and the mashed potatoes came separately too. After dinner, we were just too full to order any desserts. Overall, I would say this place lived up to its reputation. I know a lot are asking for the most important element of the dinner, pricing.

Well, I must tell you that this place is not cheap at all. The wine that we had, Marques from Spain, one glass of it is more expensive than one whole bottle of wine which I am having for my wedding dinner. There is no such thing called ‘plain water’ here. You either have distilled or sparkling water. I ordered a bottle of distilled water and it was more expensive than a steak in a regular restaurant. Yes, you read that correctly.

The main course… well, all the steaks in the menu are displayed according to country of origin, weight and how long has the cow been fed, e.g. 120 days or 150 days. And they specify that these cows are fed with grass and grass only. On the average, the price of a steak is made up of 3 digits and most of it even start with the number ‘2’.

The place is Prime, Le Meriden Hotel and this is a place where you want to pamper your loved ones… to the ultimate.