Friday, 20 July 2007

A locker tale

This week passed by in light speed. Really, without me knowing it, Friday is already here. Not that I am complaining but it’s really quick. It was also a week where I have been very discipline in going to the gym. And consider that I have not been a regular for the longest time; my whole body feels as though it’s falling apart due to all the weights.

Speaking of gym, I have been warned that my gym is notorious about having a high density of people who have lost a sense of direction. Ya’ know… those poles who like poles instead of holes. This friend of mine was telling me how he felt as though someone is always ready to pounce when you’re showering. Haha!!

One thing I wanna share with you all. You see, if you happen to take up a locker deep inside a particular row of lockers and when the gym is crowded, you practically have to squeeze through in order to reach your locker. The other day, I happened to take up such a locker. And just as when I was trying to get to my locker after my shower… this guy pulled down his pants (and underwear) and bent down… and he was freaking blocking my way!!!!

What’s worse is that I was just about to walk pass him! For a moment there, I almost landed myself in some very sticky situation. Suddenly, I came up with these 5 horrible things that could have happened to any guy in that situation…

Number 5…
As you walk passed him, one of your hand accidentally brushes his ass… OoooOOOOooo!!

Number 4…
He turns around to you and both of you have eye-contact… holy shit!

Number 3…
He smiles and begins to walk slowly to you…

Number 2…
He touches your ass!!! Shit!!

And the worst thing that can happen to you thereafter….











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You actually like it….


Happy weekend everyone…


85 comments:

Freethinker said...

wah.. 1st !

TingTitLei said...

oh fuck.. thats gross.. someone has actually opened my curtain when i was in the shower too, fucking freaked out man. and naked guys are pretty common in true fitness .. and most of them who "show off" have dicks in between the length of 2-4 inches.. tak tau malu

Rabbit said...

Hahaha! So you actually like it or not mia? Ekekekeke!

Again I'll have to go tell my mom bout this. "Ma, zewt talks bout pole n pole in gym again! arent big bro attending gym very very often lately?!"

*mum screams at the background*

=P

Seok Thong said...

I want to know also lah, you like it or not?

But for me, i'll still feel shy and malu to be naked eventhough in front of my girlfriends..I just can't do it..

irene said...

You not scared you might have gay readers, who might be offended by this post? :)

I was a member of Celebrity Fitness for awhile. The local ladies were quite modest. The ang moh ladies would change their tops out in the open and flash everyone though!

angel said...

Hahaha!!! "Sticky" situation? O.o

Brushing his @$$ is not as bad as brushing his *ahem* LMAO! Now, can YOU imagine that?

Oh, I suddenly thought of another horrible thing... What if he said 'hello' with his *ahem*...?

Have a good weekend ;)

-=SiN=- said...

well.. asian abit conservative, but strippin down is norm; afterall it not unisex washroom. everyone have that 'god given' tool~ :D

now.. the touching part as in 'brushing' or 'groping'? :X

LaSh said...

LOL!!

what the hell zewt!

I mean! what the fuck? :P

happy weekend! :P

J.T. said...

Having a Brokeback fear here, huh? haha

Jemima said...

Tell your friend never to drop the soap. LOL

Btw, this guy who dropped his pants & all, did he have a nice arse? :p

Happy Weekend, Zewt. ;)

Pookyma said...

This is great funny and hilarous...So i did you touched that guy's ass?

confessing7girl said...

i hv a question ...... so u liked it or not?? :D that is THE question!! :D
i wouldnt mind being in that situation specially if the guy had a good ass!!! :D nothing wrong with that right!! :D

Cirnelle said...

C'mon zewt... be a bit adventurous.

"Why should I close myself to the other half of the population?" - Natalie Portman.

Put in a calorie count into your effort... Trying to squeeze through without brushing the butt of a naked, bent down muscle man - 5 million calories. Trying to escape his death grip after failing in the last effort - priceless.

Sheena said...

Dude, do I detect a hint of homophobia?

Tine said...

I always wondered what went on in a male gym locker room. We all know that a lot of men who, er, swing in the other direction, frequent the gym.

Have you ever wondered how many times other men have checked out your ass? Tee hee hee :p

narrowband said...

Hahaha! Absolutely hilarious. I heard there's one gym in town that's notorious for these kind of stuff (men baring all in locker room). Thankfully, it's not so bad in my gym. Last week though, I came across one. Accidentally turned my head in that direction and immediately looked away because you know, although I have one set also but looking at a strange set is really disgusting.

But generally, in my gym, everyone's quite conservative. Of course, that's a good thing.

lingzie said...

hahahaha!!
i used to have a gym buddy and he would refuse to shower in the gym after workout. At first i thought he was just fussy about cleanliness etc...but in the end i found out it was because of the things you mentioned!! plus, he once told me that this really hot instructor (whom all the girls were swooning over at the gym) took a shower and came out absolutely naked, pole and all!! i think that did it for my friend....and no more showers in the gym for him after that!

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

haha so wat happened in the end??..theres actually a term for it..taught by no other then a gay..its called gaystead..hahaha..better be careful the next time i go to gym..

zeroimpact said...

Another one would be he turns around and the fencing begins
Muahahahaha

guaisaujai said...

Hahaha....Zewt needs to answer that final question...

"U really like it or not??"

LOLx.

I'm a member of TRUE and it seems everyone there quite conservative wor... No problem at all.

Helen said...

Is this gym the one you mentioned with lots of hunks? lol

You're a regular hor? Using PT?

I'm a butt person...but this is gross lar. If you can't beat them, join them! **imagine zewt parading around** LOL

TiNa zuRiana HusSain said...

gila lahh.. hahahahah...

ClaudiaMom said...

This is funny lol, I wanna know do you like it, what happened next? muahahahahah

Huei said...

hahAHHAHAHHAHAHAH

omg! ur fiance should stop u from going to the gym!!!

btw..r u going to the blogger booze tomoro?

E said...

shucks!!! i need to register with some kinda gym now!!!

Princess Eileen said...

My club pretty conservative, didnt see any gals naked before. But in China it is a different story, all the gals go naked in the shower room & changing room. It is not a pleasant sight to see "bushes" everywhere, including ka lat tai.

Hehe, so what is your reaction among all the 5? Haha, so what is the average size of Malaysian guys? Keke

Happy Weekend to you too, Zewt! :)

me said...

no. no. no. the worst possible thing that can happen in that situation is .....when he pulls down his pants, u walk past, he turns to look at u just as you are behind him.....u look down....and realise he just got an erection looking at you. hahahahahaha. rofl.

or, this is even worse.....your locker is opposite this guy, who is pulling down his pants to change, because of the exercise he has been doing he has an erection (can i say this word in yr blog? is it rated pg? *raise eyebrow*), when you reach yr locker, you pull down your pants to change.....and then he accidentally trips!!!

and falls on you!!!!!! kaakakakakaka. rofl. i'm so wicked.

yup!! now you'll be extra careful when you next go to the gym. don't have to thank me. and don't stare at the guys!!!

btw, yr friend is so unfair. gays like men...but doesn't mean they are maniacs. if normal ppl don't jump naked girl strangers, neither would gays! that's prejudiced thinking.

alan zed said...

hurm, do you like it ? hehe.

Calvin's Wife said...

yurgghhhh... i think you like it eh.. LOL... and people always said that gym is a best spot for us girls to get guys... BLUFF! guys to get guys more likely!!

Ngahaha Zewt, what will Julez gonna say?!!

rinnah said...

Last time when I used to go to the gym, the females were all very conservative and decent. Not much skin to see there! Hahaha.

SuddenlyIDunnoWhoIM said...

WUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......so funny wueiiiii!!!! he tot he was at home o smtg?? or he tot no ppl will go to the locker the same time s he did?? LOL~~

day-dreamer said...

Wah... Malaysia also so open-minded already ar?? :P

Have a nice weekend ahead!

j or ji said...

u shud be the one who started it all by saying...

"what a nice piece of ass!!'

and when he turn to u....say this..

"wow,is that a dick or what?"

bet,after that none of the gym goers dare to be with u inside the locker room.
You are safe now.

happy weekend bro!

Jonzz said...

How about a loud 'Excuse me!!'?

Manal said...

Having fantasies now eh zewt?

Smooth baby bottom even??? or more like some Michelin babies?

Whats the verdict? Firm or not?

H.C. Tan said...

ahhh so u join True Fitness? I tried Fitness First b4..its good. tarak shower curtain wan..use good ol' doors. and u can primp all u want with so so many mirrors. hehz

lovegoddess said...

haha..gym stories!

i've been told by gym-going girlfren that there're quite many gay man patronisers in gyms generally. even some of the trainers tend to be gay.

becareful zewt.. don't get raped ! ;)

ehon said...

*coughs* *chokes*

ahem ahem... see ghost..

zewt said...

Freethinker - haha... happy eh?

TTL - hahahaha... friend, if you dont look at their dicks, you wouldnt know they're 2-4 inches right?

Rabbit - maybe your bro like it leh...

Seok Thong - i didnt kena ok! hahaha... why are u shy?

irene - maybe you should flash them back? haha... so, any gay readers here?

angel - WTF... i dont think they will purposely show off their ahem to let u brush ler... or maybe they will... yucks!

-=Sin=- - brushing initially... groping comes later perhaps... haha!

zewt said...

LaSh - no no no... didnt happen to me ok! haha...

JT - trembling actually...

Jemima - haha... i didnt scrutinise his arse so i dont know.

pookyma - of cos not!

confessing7girl - i didnt touch his ass and he didnt touch mine ok!! hahaha... of cos you would like it... but he might no like u.

Cirnelle - hahahaha... what if he calls his 'friends'? one will never be able to escape.

Sheena - isnt it obvious enough?

zewt said...

Tine - shit... i never thought of that. oh wait...it's ok, i seldom reveal my ass. it's sacred.

narrowband - when i was in UK... i have actually seen 2 men talking face to face... with their pole facing each other... almost about to do fencing.

lingzie - hahaha... your friend didnt ride on the popularity of the hot instructor meh?

constant craver joe - that makes 2 of us.

zeroimpact - hahahaha.... fucking hell!!!!

guaisaujai - hell ... no! he didnt touch my ass in the first place!

zewt said...

Helen - no way i am going to expose my ass and ... bend down... no way ... no way at all.

Tina Hussain - hahaha... it could happen. your fiance frequents the gym?

ClaudiaMom - eh... that was all just imagination ok!

Huei - haha... maybe she needs to. most prob will be going.

E - errr... what????

Princess Eileen - ka lat tai.... HAHAHAHAHHAHA... LMAO!!!! eh, nothing in the 5 things happened to me ok!

zewt said...

me - what the hell!!!! what's with you and erection... hahaha... you seems to be in love with that word!!! and boy, you have very wild imagination. but those situations are really wicked!!! eh, what do u mean by "normal ppl dont jump naked girl strangers"?

alan zed - hey... nothing happened ok!! :P

calvin's wife - hahaha... all the girls always hide in the girls' room in my gym. jules... i guess she is ok with me being amongst gays.. i think.

rinnah - then u should start by showing some right? haha!

SuddenlyIDunnoWhoIM - aiyah... ppl in the gym always like that la. ass galore i tell u!

day dreamer - haha... on certain things.... yes.

zewt said...

jorji - WRONG!!! then all the 'lost of direction' ppl will be coming to join me in my shower cubicle!

Jonzz - no one does that in the gym my friend. you can start the trend.

Manal - sigh... there was no touching ok... all of you have very wild imagination... keke...

HC Tan - nope... used to be fitness first but not anymore. not true either. you girls... no need to worry about ppl pulling your curtains la.

lovegoddess - i will consider putting a cork (not cock) to secure my asshole then.

ehon - hahaha... worse than ghosts sometimes.

PurpLe~MuShRooM said...

I dunno about KL gym, but gyms in Shnaghai, like Princess Eileen mentioned, they are all naked in the locker and changing room! I also paiseh. Thank God my new gym is just below my home and I don't have to walk into the locker room anymore. Yay!

This is one of your very good Friday frolics. Happy Weekend to you, Zewt!

cibol said...

it didn't happen right zewt? :p

me said...

what??? u telling me normal ppl jump girl strangers?? kakakaka. puhlease, zewt!! control yr urges! rofl.

yr friend was worried gays will jump him in the shower mah. like i said, if normal heterosexuals don't do that, there's no reason to believe gays will do that. it's prejudiced thinking.

laundryamah said...

ayo very ngai him la liddat! u kena one gay loe how?? i dunno but in my previous gym got a lot fo gay loes lor...

anigma said...

Hahahha! But nothing's wrong being gay, really. In fact, most guys who are really nice - are normally gays.

Wuching said...

when ur in the shower & u drop the soap, leave it on the floor!

Elizebeth D.L. said...

Zewt, you will find more interesting in ladies changing room.

I thought only western countries women are open-minded. Here also!! All naked one in changing room. Phhmpph!!

zewt said...

Purple Mushroom - why paiseh... u also bare all la... :P... i dont think there's any problem with u walking to the locker room right?

cibol - nope... nope :P

me - ahhh... i see... good point there. but i think certain direction ppl are more aggresive.

laundryamah - hey there! gym generally a lot of gay loes.... sigh... i must really watch my back... literally.

anigma - that's true... that i have to admit. as such... i am determined to be not nice kinda guy.

Wuching - hahhahha... everyone seems to be talking about this point!

Elizebeth DL - ladies changing room eh? that is something i will never get to find out...

Doreen said...

haha! So did you like it? :P

King's wife said...

OK,Zewt... Stop fantasizing! :P
LOL!

-=SiN=- said...

-=Sin=- - brushing initially... groping comes later perhaps... haha! --> lol! need to be more open mind; lucky malaysia dun have turkish bath concept.

"look see, look see is ok. You touch mine, I'll break urs" :D

have a nice weekend!

CRIZ LAI said...

hmmm...poles...holes...touch...then? You joking right?? Haha :P

SuddenlyIDunnoWhoIM said...

BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....

all ur replies make me laugh once again...my swinging mood get a little on track *wink*

bongkersz said...

hehe dude.. you actually think of it!!!!! :D so how? you like it not? haha! er... a question, why the guy took of his pant and underwear and BENT down? he knew you were back there watching... zewt... zewt...

p/s: which gym you go man?

Angie Tan said...

Errrmmmm... I just joined the gym...

Hope the gals are OK. Maybe I'll just might stare at them. LOL!!!!

mar said...

Gyms are spooky. Hahahaha...

water_angel said...

You know..you really DO have a wild imagination....I thought accountants were supposed to be boring people..hahaha....you sure proved THAT wrong =p

pikey said...

hhmm..... "You actually like it…." <-- a totally new experience for u, not too bad right.... can try out the poles and the holes, kekekeke

Anonymous said...

HECK, WHAT'S D HANG UP U HAVE & D REST.

PATHETIC LOT U GUYS AFTER 50 YRS, STILL UR POLE & MY POLE, UR PUSS & MY PUSS.

U GUYS REALLY SUCKS BIG TIME.

GET A LIFE.

ahjohn said...

darn... dun we all love gym?

have you seen a flasher?

kayatan said...

Zewt,
U are invited to vote for which watermelon do you chose contest @
http://www.seaykopitiam.com/
ha ha ha ha
Thank you
Jamy

kayatan said...

Zewt,
One of the pre-requiste to be my MT's partner for K.L is to get all your readers to vote my watermelon choice.
Deal ?
http://www.seaykopitiam.com/
ha ha ha ha ha.
Jamy

Pumpkin said...

Wow! Scary ending

pikey said...

Wow! Scary ending <= sounds kinda homophobic >.<"

just my thoughts :p

ATHIAH ILYANA said...

scaryyyyyyyyyyyyyy

may said...

so... errrr... uhmmmm... you didn't enjoy it, did you?!

Tunku Halim said...

Serves you right for going to the gym! Next time stay home and just do a few push ups! :)

zewt said...

Doreen - didnt happen didnt happen! :P

King's wife - just think about those ugly moments la...

-=Sin=- - haha... turkish bath... i think those are pretty much the same as our jacuzzi right?

CRIZ LAI - it does happen my friend... haha...

SuddenlyIDunnoWhoIM - i am glad it did. works well for the weekend.

bongkersz - hahaha... i just thought about it in a funny way la. i dont fantasise ok!!

Angie Tan - maybe girls are ok with it, but not me.

zewt said...

mar - but i have to be there to work out anyway.

water-angel - accountants are not square. not all.

pikey - hey... like i said, that was just a thought about what COULD have happen la.

Anon @ 2.19am - what's the up with you. i reckon you're not malaysian? you should know all these things have got nothing to do with the country turning 50, and vice versa.

ahjohn - seen plenty... and try to look away all the time.

kayatan - hahaha... i shall try.

pumpkin - just a thought of what could have happen la.

ATHIAH ILYANA - hi there and welcome to AZAIG... haha... scary to those who actually go thru it.

may - hahaha... nothing happen la!

Tunku Halim - i think that's a very good idea. save money too! :)

mar said...

Say Zewt,since u keep denying that it happened...maybe it really DID happen but it was so traumatic that you blocked it out and thought it didn't happen when it actually did...;p

Daphne Ling said...

Oh Zewt,
I come back from a break (Read: Break does not equal vacation) and read this! Oh man! Nightmare...Aiyo! Apa lar...What a way to spend a weekend...

andrew said...

Hi Zewt,

I was wondering whether you would like to move to wordpress blogging platform? If you do, I can host your blog for free. Do email me back at andrewchan[at]gmail.com if you're interested?

Btw, love reading your thoughtful posts. Keep it up!

Tracy Tan said...

now i understand why my husband refuses to shower at the gym!

Cocka Doodle said...

Its ok, Zewt. We understand that it's a phase of your life where you're going thru your sexual orientation.

Hmm...somehow I got this nagging feeling that you might be calling off your wedding. MUahahahahahahaha!!!!

zewt said...

mar - sigh... no comment then.

Daphne Ling - hahaha... sigh... another case la u... didnt read properly.

andrew - hi there. thanks for your offer, wonder what's the catch though. I may mail you soon.

Tracy Tan - Hi and welcome to AZAIG. you sure he doesnt sneek intothe ladies changing room instead?

Cocka Doodle - hahahaha... no way!!!

andrew said...

Yeah, there's a small catch but I think it's negligible.

The fact is, I have plenty of unused space and bandwidth so why not give them out to my favourite bloggers. Better than leaving it to grow internet webs. =)

Hope to hear from u soon.

confessing7girl said...

hehehhe well if he is liking u im sure he wouldnt like me!! :D

zewt said...

andrew - haha... knew it. i am a bit tied down this month. perhaps i will contact u next month. hmmm... zewt.com ... nice nice...

confessing7girl - hahahahah !!!! that is damn true!

andrew said...

zewt.com has already taken by someone else, unfortunately.

yeah, do contact me when you're free. i'll give you the details then.

cheers!

Bena said...

O_o

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