Speaking the language

Wow...it has really been a while since I blogged.  I am not going to say... "So sorry for not updating my blog, etc. etc. etc"... as I know the readership for this blog has reduced tremendously...

Anyway... read about this piece of news and I have something to say about it...

It’s quite a diverse composition of nationalities here where I work.  Since arrived, I have met or spoken to (and I am not making this up)… Brits, Australians, Spaniards, Mexicans, French, Indians, Americans, Koreans, Japanese, Indonesians, Mainland Chinese, New Zealanders, Russians, Israelis, Africans, Sri Lankan, Arabs, Lebanese, Pakistanis, and of course people from Hong Kong, Singapore and Malaysia.  Have yet to meet an Italian.

But of course, being a multinational enterprise, official business language of communication is English.  Inevitably, you will hear English spoken in various accents.

It is interesting though, to note one point…

I am sure many of us have heard or even ourselves have at times, made fun of certain English accent.  The most common accent that Malaysians like to laugh at is the Indian accent, followed closely by “singing” Hong Kong accent. 

I have observed though, that no matter how heavy the accent is – those who are considered as good speakers will never add nor alter the words, grammar or structure of the English language.

I have seen many senior management personnel giving speeches, presentations or chairing meeting and though they may speak with an extremely heavy accent, English is still spoken the way English should be spoken.

I have never ah, hearing any senior people speaking English hor, like this wan you know.

What I am saying is – while Malaysians find humour in accents of certain nationalities, speaking in a modified English language (i.e. Manglish) is actually worse.  More importantly, if one strives to move ahead in the corporate world and longs to be a good speaker (which I believe is an important criterion if one longs to move up) – it is much better to speak English with a funny accent instead of speaking your own version of “English”.

1 year ago... Elimination of poverty is a myth

2 year ago... No, it's not corruption

3 years ago… The toilet encounter... Of alone and lonely... Chronicles of vol-ass-no eruptions

4 years ago… A 2nd chance with Mom

A new jurisdiction

In my current role, I am given the opportunity to participate in formulating the strategy for our function globally.  Our strategy is to be in line the overall strategy of the company; and we call it “the collective agenda”.  Essentially, it aligns the focus of the whole department.

One item within our collective agenda for 2011 is geography focus.  Apart from the usual suspects, 1 particular country caught my attention.  This jurisdiction is certainly not in the same league as Hong Kong, Singapore, China, India, Dubai but is now considered as a “geography in focus”.

It is the first time this country made it on the list.  As far as I know, Malaysia has never made it on the list before.

Since the beginning of the year, I have travelled there once and foresee more business travels to this said jurisdiction.  I have had numerous meetings with business personnel about big plans for this jurisdiction and will be having another one next week to talk about more exciting plans there.

Last week, I dialled into the HR call centre of my company to clarify some queries and I can choose to continue in English, Cantonese, Mandarin and was very surprised to actually hear that I can continue in the language of this jurisdiction in focus.

The global head of the function I am in was here in Singapore yesterday for a business visit.  Today, he is in this new jurisdiction in focus.  No, he didn’t visit Malaysia.

The country that I am talking about is…

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Indonesia.

The reason why I decided to break out from my blog hiatus to talk about this is because I just came out from a hot debate with someone saying that current Malaysian govt is doing a good job as Malaysia’s economy is only behind Singapore in this region. 

One can choose to ignore the fact that Indonesia has already surpassed Malaysia in foreign direct investment and continue to derive a false sense of superiority based on the notion that your maids and construction workers are from Indonesia. 

But the reality is this… Indonesia’s economy is moving at a speed much quicker than Malaysia and while huge capital is flowing out of Malaysia, it’s flowing the opposite direction in Indonesia. 

Of course, many Malaysians are not impacted by this phenomenon.  Will they be ever impacted? Is this a really bad thing to Malaysia?  As some quarters have mentioned, will Malaysians end up being maids and construction workers in Indonesia? The honest answer is that I don’t know.  My attempt to answer those questions may be rather bias.

One thing for sure… the statement of Malaysia’s economy being only behind Singapore in this region is incorrect.  Besides Indonesia, Philippines is also gaining substantial ground on the economic platform.  The Malaysian media may say otherwise but from where I work… right here on this seat... reality paints a very different picture.  

1 year go... When Kilkenny became 'kill Kenny' (recommended)

2 years ago… High what?... It felt like shite... A new trend with the couples

3 years ago… Some general modern slavery comparison

That... is efficiency

I received the e-mail from the Singapore external consultant on a late Monday morning. They requested for quite a number of documents to process my Singapore employment pass, after I have agreed to take up my current role.

It was a very lengthy mail and as I was rather busy at that time, I only browsed through it briefly at the point of receipt.

As the day began to slow down, I managed to read the mail in detail and it requested me to complete and sign on 2 lengthy forms, scan it and send them over together with scanned copies of my certificates, passport and to process Jules’ dependent pass, scanned copies of her passport and our marriage certificate.

The deadline to revert was Thursday in that same week, and since I only read it on Monday evening – that gave me 2 days to work on the documents.

Everything was pretty simple until I noted 1 additional requirement – a certified English translation of the document(s) is required in the event that the document(s) is in a foreign language. 

For those of us who have 1… I bet you never notice that our marriage certificate is entirely in BM.  Yes – it is, and I needed a translation.

Firstly, to find a certified translator in KL was like Malaysia winning the Suzuki Cup – you deserve a holiday if can actually find one.  I only managed to locate a commissioner of oath on Wednesday and he informed that I will need to translate the marriage certificate myself and he will only certify it. I did that but he disappeared from his office on that Wednesday afternoon.

Sensing that I may not be able to meet the Thursday deadline, I sent a mail to the Singapore external consultant asking whether I could furnish the translation on a later date. 

The reply was short and simple – Sorry sir, the deadline is not negotiable.

I was like… what the f**k is wrong with these people?!!? Can’t you just give me another day? Not like I submit the stuff on Thursday and I get the approval on Friday!!  Further, it was specifically written on the e-mail – “The Ministry of Manpower takes 1-2 weeks to process each applicable”.  Judging by that statement, I thought they wont even be submitting my application on that week itself!

But since I don’t really want to make a scene out of it and it was in relation to my employment pass, I stalked the commissioner of oath’s office right after lunch on Thursday (he was not around in the morning!! !!!) and got it certified. 

I sent everything over on Thursday evening.

I got the scanned copy of the approval letter Friday after lunch.

3 years ago… Trustology

4 years ago… Speak the right tongue

6 months post-mortem

6 months have passed since I arrived here in Singapore.  If I have to go through probation, I will be facing the moment of reckoning.  But since it is somewhat an internal transfer, I am a confirmed staff the moment I arrived in Singapore. 

And you know what? I am actually quite glad I don’t have to go through probation…

When I first got the job, and knowing that you were selected from a rather big pool of people both internally and externally – top that up with a bit of self-belief that I was above average in terms of thinking outside the box, a relatively fast thinker and fairly technical, I did felt a bit almighty about myself.

But, I was in for a shock. 

Like I mentioned earlier, I was swimming very well in the Malaysian waters and Straits of Malacca, and I thought I would definitely survive if they decide to throw me into the South China Sea.  Instead, I was thrown into the Pacific Ocean.  

And now, I found one something else… everyone who was thrown into the Pacific together with me seem to be able to swim and float much better than me!

What I am trying to say is… the world outside Malaysia is freaking big, much bigger than I imagined it to be.  The working individuals around me are a collection of crème-de-la-crème.  Everyone is good at what they do, everyone is efficient, everyone works hard. I do not like to use the word “competitive”, because I don’t think my colleagues are such.

Somewhat sad to say… the knowledge, expertise and experience I gained while in Malaysia is not that useful in the international scene. Even in certain situation where it was useful, the knowledge and expertise of those gained by people from Europe and America seems to carry more weight.

For a few months, I was struggling just to keep my head above the water, trying to avoid being drowned not by the quantum of work given to me, but rather the complexity. 

And while trying to solve these issues, I am often left amazed by my colleagues.  Everything that I thought I was fairly good at, most of them are better than me.  And those one level above me are really geniuses.  I dunno… maybe I am just dumb.

I am beginning to find my footing in this new world, or should I say… building enough muscles and stamina to swim and float in the Pacific Ocean.  But certainly, there is plenty to be learned.

1 year ago… Read

2 years ago… To capture the rapture

3 years ago… Appreciating life

Randomly Friday

I gave up my seat to a pregnant lady in the MRT just now… and everyone stared at me as though I tried to detonate a bomb in the MRT…

I guess that’s not a surprise… when I first arrived and had to move around in crutches, I was ignored entirely in the MRT.  One even went into instant slumber as soon as she made eye-contact with me.   You should have seen how she did it… quite outrages.

There were 2 occasions where a seat was offered to me… and both were from Caucasians.

Anyway… have been very busy at work.  Brain seems to tire down quickly here.  Maybe I use my brain more here, or maybe I just don’t have the brain to catch up hence over-worked my brain.

Will be travelling next week… Up… down… meeting… up… down… meeting… meeting… up down… back to office… up down… attend wedding dinner… going to be crazy.

Heard Malaysia just announced in the national budget that a 100-storey tower is to be built.  More money to be spent!  Actually, I already heard about this 6 months ago… someone said it’s another election money raising scheme… oh well, I am just glad I am no longer funding it.

Since import duty on handbags, perfumes and lingerie has been removed… time to go shopping!

Have a good weekend…

1 year ago… Perils of direct translation… Dissecting the brain… You are going!!?

2 years ago… The chronicles of holes and poles…

3 years ago… An erotic lunch and a traumatic locker experience… Are you still chasing?… A very personal sharing

Without a car

Besides throwing me with this question, another common query I get from people (as some of you might have guessed from the title) is whether I am suffering from not having a car.  Yes, in case you don’t know, I don’t own a car here in Singapore.

Objectively speaking, this no-car issue is an epitome of half-glass-empty vs. half-glass-full argument.

Indeed, as a typical Malaysian – suddenly not being able to just hop behind the wheel and go to where you want to go is quite a severe loss of convenience, or “perceived” convenience depending on how you see it.

There were days when it rains in the morning, where I felt a car would be nice because the walk from my place to the MRT station is not entirely sheltered.  There were nights where I would like to meet up with my friends for drinks or ‘teh-tarik’ but that is not possible.  There were days when I am standing next to people in the MRT who will release aroma as though they have just dipped themselves in shite… and I felt that I should have been sitting in a car.

And many more…

But hang on…

The walk from my condo to the nearest MRT station is at the most, 5 minutes – actually, 3 to sheltered underpass leading to the station.  I’ve timed this. My office is located right above the MRT station.

Rain or thunderstorm, I know I will only need to be in the MRT for 10 minutes – the duration of my journey.  This also means that when I sms my wife “Coming home now”… she can begin to heat up dinner and I will be back sitting at the table enjoying my meal within 25 minutes, max – rain or thunderstorm.  How long does it take for you to get home, in a non-rainy day?

I can always walk away from people with “those” aroma.  And because I am not that short, I don’t have to endure the projection from the armpit of those people who lift up their hands to hang on to the handle-bar.  Maybe others had to endure mine, but I haven’t noticed anyone walking away from me.

And all these, cost me SGD2.02 a day, about MYR100 a month – less than 1 full tank that I had to fill weekly in Malaysia.  And I am not paying for a car which is a depreciating asset.

Right, I can’t have my teh-tarik or nasi-lemak or roti-canai at night but seriously, I can live with that.  And if MRT doesn’t go to the places I want to go, I can take the bus from the bus-stop right in front of my condo – which is clean, on time and takes me to a lot of other places.  Alternatively, I can take the cab – which is reasonably priced, charges based meter and safe.

If all fails – I will take it as God telling me not to go out.

Certainly, I will not say that I will never buy a car.  But at the moment, it is more of a “want” instead of a “need”.  Am I tempted to buy one?  Hell yes! Car prices are cheap if you compare dollar-to-dollar.  2 months ago, a fellow brain-drain digger just walked-in to a dealer and bought a 4-year-old 5-series for less than SGD90k.  I checked out a few 4-year-old 3-series and most of them are below SGD70k.  I am fighting temptation on a daily basis.

Another point – my boss who probably earns double my salary does not own a car. I know another unit-head within my function who probably earns 4 times my salary does not own a car either.  Hence, it is the Malaysian in me who wants a car, not the Zewt in me who needs a car.

Just want to touch on the “convenience” of having a car in Malaysia… a friend of my mine said he cannot work in Singapore because he cannot stand not being able to “just hop into the car and go to wherever he wants to go”. 

I think that statement is grossly incomplete.  Yes, you may be able to go wherever you want to go.  But can you get there on time?  Is it peak hour and hence jam?  Is it raining and hence you will be sitting in your car cursing in facebook?  Can you get a car-park at your destination?  And depending on the time of the day (something which is getting increasingly worrying and I have stories to tell), is it safe to just drive out? 

So is the car-less situation a half-glass-empty or half-glass-full for me?  A bit of both depending on the situation; but more towards half-glass-full… for now.

1 year ago… Joseph the unfortunate banana… Maybe reality could be should be

2 years ago… And you think they have no life… And you think the big pays big

3 years ago… A state of many people… Metamorphosis of slaves

How does it feel to be in my current modern slavery position

Obviously, the initial feeling is pretty good. I mean… moving into a head office position, it does gives you a glamorous feeling.

When I first arrived in the office, almost all the administrative and logistic matters were already settled… gadgets were cool and they gave me an i-Phone!… linked to my work mail server of course. But still… very cool. So yeah… it was a good feeling…

Next, the composition of colleagues within my team is quite over-whelming. I am the second youngest guy in the team and the only person without international exposure, the rest are all very experience people in this function I am in.

Sometimes, during discussions; the level of conversation is so high level and so corporately intellectual, I am left thoroughly amazed. I would like to believe that I am quite a quick thinker but man… these guys whom I work with are way too fast for me. I am like a small child feeding off the experience and knowledge of others.

And then, there will be days where I do feel quite powerful. With just 1 e-mail, I can (if I want) send chills through some people’s spine. With just 1 e-mail, I can instruct people to do a lot of things involving quite a lot of $$$. The details are beyond sharing boundaries but yeah… such are the days when I feel powerful.

Then there are days where I feel I am being put on the spot. Today – was a classic example. I was thrown with about 15 slides and was then asked to do a presentation… 10 minutes before a meeting. Fair enough, I am fairly familiar with the stuff but shite… 10 minutes preparation!

I think my boss did it on purpose because he has put me on the spot several times. Maybe it’s a training process, I should ask him the next time we have our 1-to-1 talk. Anyway, I have to say enjoy it. It’s actually very satisfying when you pull it off.

Apart from all that…

I have to admit that it can be quite frightening being in this position. I would even go to the extent to say that there were times where I really felt very fearful. I am fully aware that this organisation has very low tolerance for mistake. If I am fucked… I am really fucked…

Yeah… it’s glamorous to feel powerful and all but if I made a wrong call, I know my job is on the line.

Life is like that… I guess…


1 year ago… The unforgettable accident experience Part 3… Are you racist?

3 years ago… Whack it over the weekend

My Singapore working hours

“So what time do you knock-off?”
“How late do you work till?”
“Are the hours crazy?”

I have been bombarded with the above questions or the likes for the last 3 months by my Malaysian friends and ex-colleagues. All are under the impression that people here work non-stop and I will be drowned in it.

Remember the conversation that I had with my boss on why he hired me? In that conversation, he also told me this…

“You want to come in late, you come in late. You want to go for 2 hour lunch, you go for 2 hour lunch. You want to go back early, you can just go. But whatever you do… make sure you don’t fucked up in your work. If you’re fucked, I’m fucked. Staying back late to show me that you work hard doesn’t work here”

I guess that pretty much sums up the trend in my office. The big-boss generally leaves at around 6.45pm because he needs to pick up his kids. Of course, certain days he will have to stay for con-calls or other urgent matters. But it’s not very frequent.

There are a few days where my direct boss will leave between 6 – 6.30pm for his sports activities. Generally, he won’t stay past 7pm.

As for me… So far, there was only 1 day where I stayed on past 9pm because I had to rush something. On average, I will be having dinner at home by 7.30pm.

So to answer all those questions…

I do not stay late because my boss has made it very clear that it’s the quality and not the quantity that matters. I believe that’s the general principle here in Singapore, it’s all about performance. The if-you-go-back-early-means-you-don’t-have-enough-work theory doesn’t apply here, though that theory is very prominent in Malaysia where quantity is often perceived as performance.

As for getting into the office, I get in at around 9 – 9.15am. There were a few days where I have to come in early for calls with people from USA but that is not an everyday thing.

During my recent kidney check-up, I told my boss about my appointment and that I will be coming in late. He (fully aware of my kidney situation) looked at me funny and said…

“You don’t have to tell me these things. It’s a very matured working environment here, and you are not a junior person. If you have to go, you have to go”.

That’s pretty much my Singapore working hours.


3 years ago… A trip of co-incidences… A thought from an overloaded brain

Some discoveries after 3 months in Singapore

Hello world… ! This is arguably the longest break I have taken from blogging. Work being the main reason, with laziness being the combination when time permits.

As for work, many have asked whether I am struggling with my Mandarin. Well, in the team that I work in… there is a Japanese, a Korean, an Indian, an American, an Australian, a Pakistani, a Mexican coming on board soon, 3 Malaysians including myself; and 3 Singaporeans… do you think I will be struggling with my Mandarin?

Anyway –

My working life in Singapore has almost reached 3 months. And indeed, it has been a revolutionary experience for me.

When I was in Malaysia, I was already quite senior in the function that I was in. Back then, I was already able to see issues and happenings in the corporation and the industry that I was in from a nationwide perspective. And since it is a prominent industry, I was also able to see things happening within the government agencies and get to know things that will never appear in the news.

And because I could see all these and was involved in a lot of the major in-country transactions, it did gave me a sense of achievement and as time goes by, the feeling of I-can-conquer-the-world began to creep in.

Metaphorically speaking, I was swimming very well in the Malaysian rivers and possibly, straits of Malacca. These were my territories. I knew I would be thrown into something deeper when I come to Singapore. I thought it would be the South China Sea.

I was wrong, I was thrown right smack in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

It’s like how you once felt strong and mighty after graduation, ready to take on the world only to find out that you knew nothing about the modern slavery world. Multiply that by about 50, and that’s more or less about my current feeling.

From a country function, I now have to look after the business stream that I am assigned to… globally. I realised that what I used to look after in Malaysia was just so tiny.

And when I was in Malaysia, I used to make some noises to head office about the issues that I had and how attention must be paid or else, something might just blow up. Back then, I was often left perplexed as issues escalated by me seemed to have landed on deaf ears.

Don’t they care? If something blows up, it’s going to cost the corporation a lot of money. Why no one seemed to care?… I wondered…

Now I know why…

Again… metaphorically speaking…

If Malaysian operation is on fire, and help is sought from head office, the first thing people in the head office (i.e. where I am now) are supposed to do, it to ask whether countries like China, India, Singapore, Hong Kong, UK, Middle East whether there’s any fire there. If there’s fire in these jurisdictions, we’ll put it out. If not, we will check whether there’s any potential fire hazard in these countries first, to protect the operations here. If there’s no such hazard, we will put mitigating steps to ensure such fire does not happen.

And all these will take place while Malaysia operation is on fire.

Priority is to protect major operations first before coming to Malaysia’s rescue. China, India, Hong Kong, UK, etc. are where all the big bucks are. And by the time those major operations are well reviewed, Malaysian operation already put out the fire themselves (i.e. what I used to do).

And during meetings or discussions, I have tried to bring Malaysia into the picture, things that need to be looked at. But I have since learned that I should look at the “bigger picture”.

And this is not just in the corporation that I am in. Some friends of mine who are in high positions in their respective multi-national corporations also experienced the same thing. And lately, I can tell you that Indonesia is coming into prominence. There have been instructions that Indonesia is to be “guarded”.

In effect, it does give a broad idea of where Malaysia stood in the eyes of multi-nationals, and I am experiencing it… first hand.

You might say that I keep bashing Malaysia because I am out of the country, etc, etc… Well, you can say anything, but this is reality.



1 year ago… Who rang the doorbell?… I was spotted

2 years ago… 10 vs 1… The game

3 years ago… Keyword splendour… One night on the wrong stand

Things I just found out about Singapore

I am not working today, it’s a public holiday here. The occasion…the Singapore National Day.

I didn’t know Singapore National Day is different from Malaysia’s. Did you?

I have always thought the Singapore’s president is a Chinese, because ya’ know, it’s a racist country… but it’s an Indian.

The national anthem of Singapore, is in Malay. Some of my friend’s say that’s the only Malay they can speak. But national anthem in Malay? Ok lah, not so surprising…

Watching the national parade (while blogging), I noticed the slogan above where all the VIPs sat showed… “Majulah Singapura”… interesting…

When the parade commander gave his command to the contingent… I thought he was going to shout “Attention!”. But instead, he shouted… “BARIS… BARIS SETIA!”… This apparently country conducts the national parade in Malay.

The Boys’ and Girls’ Brigade are in the marching contingent here. They used to be in the Malaysia national day parade too, but these Christian based uniformed organisations have since been removed from harmonious 1Malaysia national day parade.

I asked someone, a Singaporean… “National Day… independence from who?”
“From you guys la…” I guess he meant Malaysia.
“Haha… you guys are damn proud right?”
“Of course! Otherwise, we will all end up like you”

Don’t know whether I should be sad or laugh at that statement. But I suppose he has a point. It’s ok lah, like so many anonymous fellas who commented… Malaysia is so much better than Singapore because Singaporean drinks processed pee water.


1 year ago… Story from Jane

2 years ago… It was just an ordinary day

3 years ago… Henry Suckers and the 4 schools of magic… What’s with the name?

The speechless left me speechless

“Honestly speaking, it is not easy to reach this level of damage. In order to get this, you must have heavy objects, piled on top of each other and moved around consistently in a circular motion within the same area. I just can't seem to picture how it ended up like this.

<…pause…>

Seriously, this is beyond my comprehension; which is why I am really thinking hard on how to fix this. I am speechless looking at this…”

He was a contractor, whom I called to look at the damage on the floor in my apartment. He came with dirty boots… un-tucked polo t-shirt… with paint stains on his trousers… he looked like a typical contractor…

But…

He gave the above assessment, in perfect English spoken in perfect pronunciation…

He is an epitome of “don’t judge a book by its cover”. I supposed you would never encounter such a contractor in Malaysia…

He was left speechless by the damage on the floor… I was left speechless by him…


3 years ago… From the spoon to a cat

Walk talk

If you ask any Malaysians currently residing in Singapore – what is the thing that they hate most about Singapore, you will most probably get one common answer… “need to walk a lot lah…”

Using “poor public transport” as an excuse, many Malaysians evolved into car addict. Walking became secondary. To some, not owning a car (which is very rare in Malaysia) and having to walk means you are of the lower class.

Try asking a girl for a date and tell her you will meet her at the LRT station, see what reaction you will get…

I personally know a friend who said… “The only reason why I will not work in Singapore is because I can't stand not having a car”… Wow…the “only reason”.

Admit it, we are all car whores. Even if the Malaysian public transport system improves tremendously, many will sill drive. Being one where my car used to be less than 20 steps from my door, and it takes less than 5 minutes to walk from my parking lot to my former office… not being able certainly did worry me quite a bit…

But things took a twist…

As you know, I had ACL reconstruction surgery due to a football injury. I was bed-ridden for almost a week, with very limited mobility via the walking frame (not even the crutches). Only after a week, crutches came into the picture. And the crutches stayed with me for a month, with another week of limping before I can finally walk normally.

During that time… believe me when I say… I long to walk… when I finally can get up from my chair without having to get hold of my crutches and immediately take a step forward to wherever I want to go… it was joy beyond description.

We are so pampered by various means and we forget that walking is not a torture, or low class… it’s a gift. Ask those who are without limbs, and they will tell you they would love to walk rather than to be wheeled around in a chair.

Are you able to walk and complain about it?


2 years ago… Who thou seeketh in thy sadness?… Live your best life

3 years ago… The sponge and the dirty spoon

Why did you hire me?

I asked that straight to my boss’ face the other day, and I think I caught him by surprise. And the first word that came from him was… “personality”…

The nature of my work requires a certain level of technical knowledge, and I don’t think I am a very technically sound person. Well, I am not saying that I am crap, but there are certainly others who are much better than me. I am just slightly above average.

Hence, I never really expected him to say that I am given the job because I am exceptionally good in what I do. Personality certainly made more sense.

He further explained that I have the personality to interact well with people, which is crucial in the role I am in now. 75% of my time is spent talking to people. The ability to articulate my thoughts and the courage to voice them out in front of people, those are the attributes that landed me this job.

Other remarks from him include – I was “pretty natural” when I want to initiate a conversation with someone, and that I am not one who reacts negatively towards criticism.

Well, I sort of know why I was offered this position. Asking him that question was just me trying to test how does my boss sees me.

Succeeding in life is not just about working hard and being good that what you do. Of course, those are certainly important attributes. But I have learned that there is one crucial component to success… the ability to talk.

Are you able to stand in front of 50 people and talk without pissing in your pants? And if you do talk, do the 50 people understand what you are talking about? When you bump into your big big big boss at the pantry, do you quickly get your drink and go away hoping he/she didn’t notice you? Or do you try to strike a conversation with him/her? When you are at a dinner function, and your big big big boss decides to sit next to you, do you freeze in fear? Or are you able to speak as though he/she is a regular colleague (talking sense of course)?

All these things matter. And apparently, “they” have been observing me. The time when I was sent to London… those conferences… those formal dinner functions… those informal gatherings…

Some are of the opinion that “ability to talk” equals “ability to bullshit”. While that is not entirely accurate, there are certainly more successful bullshiters compared to successful non-bullshiters.


1 year ago… Do you know you work for the bank?… Please scold your parents

2 years ago… A change in dominant language… Gym tales – female version

3 years ago… Orgasm comparison… Debit affluence, credit conscience

Finally, something to complain about Singapore

Many teased me about how I kept praising this new land I am in. Perhaps I was a bit over-board there hence I paused and try to keep a lookout for things that I do not like about Singapore.

Finally found it…

The other day, Jules went to purchase something from the supermarket and had to “insist” that she doesn’t want a plastic bag. Apparently, the cashier was puzzled as to why she doesn’t want to take plastic bag.

Packing food for lunch is a culture, the amount of plastic and styrofoam containers used during lunchtime is mind-boggling. If you buy coffee, it will come in styrofoam cup and on top of that, you will be given a little plastic holder to carry it.

Heck! I was out for lunch yesterday and I ate at the restaurant… they gave me plastic cutleries. The drinks and desserts came in plastic containers.

I have to say, Singapore is terribly un-environmental friendly. Usage of plastic bags, plastic cups, styrofoam containers, disposable plastic cutleries are as rampant as corruption in Malaysia. When I told them I used to bring my own container to pack food, they were astonished.

I suppose Singapore is such a fast pace country, washing kitchenware or cutleries would be a waste of time. Time, which can better used to generate more money. It is a bit sad. I am glad Malaysia is a few steps ahead of Singapore in this department.

And being a country with limited source of land, I do wonder… where do all these non-biodegradable thrash go? Being recycled?... Have yet to find out…


1 year ago… 1 of the 50 facts… Sex 101: Basics are essential

2 years ago… More struggles… A time travelling twist… Do you have sweaty chest?

The maiden Singapore lunch time experience

I managed to walk much better now so I decided to venture out for lunch today. My colleagues took me to his hawker centre about 10 minutes walk from my office. I have to admit, I was quite surprised to see such set-up amidst the Singapore Central Business District.

I would say this hawker centre is akin to the mamak area in Damansara Uptown. It’s indoor, the stalls are all systematically arranged. Of course, I experienced first hand the famous Singapore tissue-for-the-seat policy.

For the uninformed – here in Singapore, you can ‘reserve’ a seat at the food court (in this case, the hawker centre) by placing your tissue on the seat. Once it is there, no one will take your seat.

Some may ridicule it and some say it makes no sense to allow people to reserve seat in such a manner. Well, I suppose this is just another glimpse on Singapore’s structured way of doing things. I am not complaining, I get walk around scouting for food knowing my seat is well reserved by a pack of tissue paper.

SGD3 for chicken and roast pork rice. Not exactly the best but it’s certainly edible. If it’s just chicken rice, it will be SGD2.50… such price for a place right smack in the middle of the Central Business District.

I just think that lunch is so affordable.

Don’t convert, because generally, the pay in Singapore is dollar-to-dollar on par with Malaysia. That is to say, someone who is earning MYR5,000 in Malaysia will earn SGD5,000 in Singapore. So when you pay MYR5 (or MYR8.90 in a nice food court) with Malaysian salary versus paying SGD3 with Singapore salary… which one is more expensive?

But don’t worry, the great 10th Malaysian Plan is going to go ahead and it’s going to transform Malaysia into a high-income economy. With that grand plan, I am sure Malaysia will be propelled to greatness, just like how the 9 great Malaysian Plans before it.

I enjoyed my lunch today…


1 year ago… Between pride and necessity

2 years ago… A page before 30

3 years ago… A glimpse from the other side

One week after leaving Malaysia

Having been to Singapore for only a week, the Malaysian connection is obviously still pretty much alive in me. I still log on to TheStar to read about Malaysian sports and keeping a close eye on MalaysiaToday and MalaysianInsider.

As always, I get to read about depressing news such as the father or the alleged jet engine thief claiming abuse… United Nations condemning Malaysia… MYR40m being spent on some electric train which has now been derailed, etc. All these on top information I read about Malaysia made available to me due to the industry I am in, which can also be quite depressing…

Ya’ know… stuff that makes you go… “Malaysia is just so damn fucked-up!”…

On the other hand; since arriving here, I have been greeted with pleasant experiences with cabbies… cars deliberately stopping for me to cross the street… impressive service being rendered when I went for physio in Singapore General Hospital (a govt hospital)… wife went to the wet market and came back with nothing but praises on friendliness and cleanliness…

All these gave me a glimpse of why most Malaysians who have left Malaysia, will end up not giving a damn on what is happening back “home”.

For now, I think I will still be very much connected with Malaysia. And I told myself to stay connected and not lose sight. But then again, it has only been a week.

What will happen 6 months down the road?... only time will tell…


1 year ago… He asked 5 times

2 years ago… Pelbagai lawak menuntut rebat

3 years ago… Those typo experiences… A Zimbabwean tale

Singapore cabbies

They are just so nice! Perhaps it’s a norm, perhaps it’s because I am walking on crutches, but they have been patiently helpful. 7 is the amount of times I have taken a cab since I arrived in Singapore and the ratio of good cabbies is 100%.

As you can imagine – me being on crutches and not being able to bend my knee that much, getting in and out of cabs will take some time. All of them told me to take my time to get in and get out. Not a single cab driver rushed me.

2 of them were kind enough to adjust the passenger seat themselves so that I can get more leg room. That’s not all…

It was raining and 1 of them got down from his cab and held the umbrella while I position myself to get out from the cab. He even told me to be happy always so that recovery process will be faster. Unbelievable…

But the cab who took me back to my apartment yesterday certain took the cherry. After paying him, he asked me if I can get off on the right side. Since the surgery is on my left knee, getting off on the right is not preferred.

I told him “no” and he then asked me to stay in the vehicle. He got off from his cab, walked to the left side of the vehicle, stopped the traffic (there were quite a lot of cars passing the left side of the cab) and opened the door for me to get off. He then made sure that I got onto the pavement before getting back to his cab.

I cannot imagine how it would be if I have to take cabs in KL.

Right now, some of you might be thinking that Zewt has travelled to Singapore and will begin to criticise Malaysia more and will fail to appreciate Malaysia as his homeland.

It’s not about criticising. I think the curse that is currently upon Malaysian is that, mediocrity has become so common, it is acceptable.

Staying within the same notion, it should not be the case where I am surprise at the service level I getting by Singapore cabbies. This is how things should be. On the contrary, Malaysians should be astonished at the atrocious service and treatment by Malaysian cabbies. But no, it has become a norm, it has become a lifestyle.

Of course, there is the all time favourite “there is nothing we can do” phrase. While that carries some truth, change it is not entirely beyond Malaysians’ grasp. I am sure you know what I am talking about.

Anyway – if you are to ask me how is Singapore so far. Well, let’s just say the first impression has been great.


1 year ago… The 500th rhyme

3 years ago… Of hip hop, diet and a search