Wednesday, 30 July 2008

Live your best life

This year has been a real low as far as health is concern. First, it was the kidney and the next thing I know, I was also seeing a gastro and multiple visits to an ENT. 2 weeks ago, I went for a MRI and that adds up to the growing list of test and scans I have done this year which include CT Scan, Uroflow, Endoscopy, multiple ultrasound, multiple blood test, 24 hour urinalysis and the good ‘ol x-ray.

There are 2 reasons why people go for such things. The first being regular check ups or check ups for certain applications which of course, you wouldn’t feel fearful. The second is when the doctor suspected something and you are asked to go. Truth be told, it’s not a very nice feeling, not at all.

Amidst all these, I must say a very big thank you to God not only for granting me strength when I needed them most, but also for giving me a wife who has been there for me all these while, who refused to break down when I was at the verge of it. To fall right into this state so quick after our marriage is a test beyond all means.

I know I have said it many times in AZAIG but life is just so precious that you can't possibly imagine how fragile it is. We are just a few degrees away between sick and healthy, just a few cells away between normal and mutation and just a few milligrams away between normal and abnormal reading of whatever that is in your blood. How close is it between hope… and in need of hope.

Looking back, I think I am very ready to just lose it all and die a few years ago. Life was carefree then as I was living as though I don’t bother about anything, I just want to be who I am. I had no one beside myself. In away, I had nothing to lose.

But how things have changed. Right now, I am so fearful of death. Not because of death itself but what death can take away from me. I have got so much going on for me now that I just have got too much too lose. Do you have anything to lose?

And thus I will fight, I will speak life to myself, and I will hold on to the promises of the only One capable of keeping promises.
Don’t drink, don’t smoke, eat and live healthy… you’ll die too. In reply to that, I once said that it is not about death but the manner of death which is important. Now, may I add… the timing of your death is also crucial.

Life your best life!… whatever that means…

33 comments:

The Malaysian Life said...

I totally agree. We have only one life (unless you believe in reincarnation) - Live your best life, in your current lifespan. It need not be the life you want, but choose to live the best life you can have.

I think it was Greg Norman who said, "My goal is not to be the best golfer in the world, but to be the best golfer I can be"

For those who believe in reincarnation; you'll never know who (or what) you'll reincarnate as - an animal or a completely different human being. Nevertheless, you'll NEVER reincarnate to be the same person you are today.

rainbow angeles said...

if only we knew exactly when it's Time's Up, huh? probably then we'd "live our best life", u reckon?

all the best, zewt..

WMD: Wife, Mother, Daughter said...

You said everything right and well. Will keep you in prayers.

The Lord will give us the strength we need and the grace to find comfort as we count the lil blessings He has bestowed on us despite the challenges thrown upon us.

Take care and all the best.

Aoki said...

Zewt, can you do me a big big favour? Go and watch this video titled 99 Balloons, http://youtube.com/watch?v=th6Njr-qkq0.

Although life is fragile, but Eliot was an angel who brought blessing to others and is still blessing many more to come :)Life is precious :)

mistipurple said...

life is suffering. i'm sorry to sound negative. i think having a short life is a blessing. but without sickness of course. anyway we can't choose the way to go.

Jemima said...

That means.. fill your days with action & you'll fill your life with richness.. & others' lives with joy.. for even the smallest action has far greater power than the most profound & well thought-out intention.

God Bless!

the Constantly Dramatic One said...

I dont drink. I dont smoke. I do however eat an unGodly amount of chocolate....Should really think about that.

Thanks for the advice dude.

sooi sooi said...

I've always had a "philosophical" outlook about death; ya know, que sera sera what will be will be...until I had my baby and I just can't bear the thought of death. I just pray that God will be kind enough to grant me enough time to see my grandkids.

Just Jasmine said...

Zewt, at my age now, I'm not so afraid of death - what I'm more afraid of is the death of my loved ones.

Just the thought of it makes me scared - afraid of losing them.

Oh goodbye... I hate goodbyes!!!

Anyway Zewt, I'll live life to the max, I will follow you, yeah!!!

Once again, thanks Zewt!
Wishing you the best of health! :D

cc said...

Amen to that! You take care zewt!

may said...

yes, there's a lot to lose, however...

we came into this world with nothing, and through society's conditioning and what we're brought up with, we perhaps think we do have lots to lose. what if we think the lighter side and say, "we've gained so much in this lifetime, and for that I'm grateful and shall not want for more when I leave"?

my two philosophy-on-a-cold-Thursday-morning cents ;-)

hope you're well, zewt.

myop101 said...

dear zewt,

Don't be too worried k. If you trust in Him completely, He will put into effect what is not only best for you but those around you.

I too worry about what ifs sometimes. But when i look into the fragility of my life and all around me and how when i gaze into the sky that our existence is a mere millisecond compared to the stars that shine from billion of light years away, i realised that the God that would bother with a tiny speck like me must have a greater plan in mind.

So, even as i feel stress and lonely with working towards unearthly hours to meet the deadline while missing the company of my wife and loved ones, i know He has a plan for me.

What is the plan, I don't know but it is the journey that matters to me because the destination is already determined. The end is merely the threshold to a new location but the relationship with Him deepens all the way. It is weird, I can see the point when Paul said to live is for Christ, to die is a gain...

Hope I am not being too morbid for you...:)

PurpLe~MuShRooM said...

I believe it's all fated! So just be happy and stop worrying about things you cannot control or fix. For those that you can fix, just do it!

Huei said...

life's fragile, i hear sad stores all the time (i'm just a jinx la i think..n it comes in pairs)..so yes..make the best of it..we never know what might happen tomorrow

death itself is not fearful, we just stop seeing this world, but it's people around who feel the worst of the pain..sigh..

Sharon said...

hang in there and be strong, i'll include u in my prayers :)

pinknpurplelizard said...

Hope you're alright... I know that its no fun going for all those tests and examinations.

Have faith and hope for the best. I'm sure He has a plan for you somehow coz this all wouldn't happen for no reason.

Lil' Ms Pinky said...

Hang in there, buddy. God giveth and God taketh, but his servants will be duly rewarded. :)

Anonymous said...

hi Zewt, hope u are well, may i know what happen to ur kidney?i feel so worry about my health too sometimes, im a paranoid.take care ya!

Winn said...

i wanna die at home, with my loved ones around me....and watch me go.....

or maybe die in my sleep better ar?

H.C. Tan said...

i think you are living your life the way you should be at the moment. at least u now know to cherish ur wife and the ppl around you =) hugs zewt

Aphrodite said...

i have never been in this situ...but my near ones have...and it scares the crap out of me...loosing someone very close is just unimaginable :'(

missironic said...

you seem to be having lots of bad things happening to u lately eh..well,as they say..after all the bad things happened, the good things will appear after tat..well, lets hope for that!

well, yea..everyone will die..is either die peacefully or painfully..well, i hope to die peacefully..im sure everyone wants tat too..so got to live life healthily and meaningfully, yea?

well, i wish u best of health, zewt..take care there! =D

Anak Merdeka said...

I hope you will enjoy this weekend with your wifey, and I hope too that you will have many many more blessed weekends to come with your wifey! :-)

erm said...

kadang2...i hate the fact that i couldn't become a doctor

i just realise it when my father was ill

a good life...i picture keeping people around me have enough food on the table...could contribute a little to my community

kalau u happy...then i'm happy jugak

zewt said...

The Malaysian Life - well, i dont believe in reincarnation but whatever it is... life your life well.

rainbow angeles - well, while the time is not up.. make sure we keep our health up!

WMD: Wife, Mother, Daughter - Amen to that... Those who wait in the Lord will renew their strength.

Aoki - will definitely look at it later... thanks :)

mistipurple - life is suffering because Adam was cursed from the very beginning :)... but salvation belongs to God.

Jemima - richness of life... certainly not richness of possession :)

zewt said...

the constantly dramatic one - hahaha.... work out work out!!

sooi sooi - that is somewhat the kinda thinking i am having now. life is too beautiful to die right now.

Just Jasmine - well, while caring for your loved ones, dont forget to care for yourself too :)

cc - thanks... you take care too!

may - very philosophical indeed :)... i will remember that.

myop101 - yeah, He has a plan for us, a plan not to harm us but to prosper us... i keep reminding myself that.... hahaha... not that morbid lah... it's reality.

zewt said...

huei - yeah, you're right, we just don want to leave our loved ones behind.

Sharon - :) thanks.

pinknpurplelizard - thanks... certainly will.

Lil' Ms Pinky - :)... i will take heart in that.

Anon @ 31/7 1.49pm - i have a kidney condition where i leak blood and protein.

Winn - well, that's not up to you...

zewt said...

purple mushroom - some things cant be fixed... only God can do it :)

HC Tan - definitely will. my wife is important to me.

Aphrodite - well, that's the reality of life... but we must have faith.

missironic - yeah, i am really looking forward to see the silver lining after the dark clouds.

Anak Merdeka - she is in aust... but she is coming back!

erm - sorry to hear about your dad... i hope he is well. yeah, let us all contribute to the society.

missironic said...

i wish u luck! =D

Mcmercedez said...

TO be honest, eat how much and wear how much, is all already been planned by the God Almighty..

So we need to live life to the fullest everyday.. hehe..

zewt said...

missironic - thanks :)

mcmercedez - hmmm... God said... dont live like a foolish man ler...

sharlydia said...

Totally agree with u zewt! Especially for someone like me who has gone soooo close to death, yet been pulled back to live by God, I want to live life to the fullest every single day!

zewt said...

sharlydia - but living life to the fullest doesnt really mean pushing yourself to the limit ya... know your limits in God :)