It felt like shite

Most of you would remember that I went on secondment to London for more than a month last year. And it didn’t snow then, darn it!

Anyway, my London office appointed a consultant to help me with my temporary work permit. And so this consultant mailed me one day asking for my details in order for her to process my work permit. Details required by her were the usual name, address, gender, etc. Amongst all that, she also asked for my annual salary in £. And so, I converted my salary to £ and mailed it to her together with other information that she required.

Ya’ know what? A few days later, she replied my e-mail…

Dear Mr. Zewt,

Thank you for your prompt response. The details that you sent are in order except for 1 item. Please send me your annual salary.

And she actually bold the word annual.

It really felt like shite when I replied to her that the number I gave her was indeed… my annual salary.

Ever felt shite before?


1 year ago… Thoughts from govt talk

From far and near, they all flock here

In case you don’t know, the picture on the left is the entrance of a small park in Bukit Bintang called Ain Arabia. Our govt was so kind to the middle-eastern tourists that we have park built just for them. Well, since we claim that tourists from that region now contribute a significant amount of money to the tourism industry, I guess that was just a small hospitality gesture.

We often hear that middle-eastern tourists prefer to come to our beloved country as we share the similar culture, religion and a somewhat less-punishing but yet similar weather. Those are the reasons why they are pouring their oil money into our country, or so they claimed.

When I was in London earlier this year, I visited Harrods; one of the premier shopping places in town. As I entered the building, I was greeted by a multitude of Arabs. No disrespect but it is very easy to recognise them due to their distinct dressing. There were just an ocean of them. I told my friend that I thought they prefer to go to Malaysia.

“Cannot afford to come to London then go Malaysia lor…” that was his reply.

On that weekend in London, I had dinner at this placed called “Wong Kei”, a very famous Chinese restaurant due to a peculiar reason. A story for another day perhaps.

Anyway, sitting next to my table were five “ang mohs” chatting away about purchasing properties. I know it’s rude to ear-drop but their conversation caught my attention as they mentioned the phrase “properties in Malaysia”. True enough, they were talking about how cheap it is to buy properties in Malaysia as they cannot afford properties elsewhere and how the local girls here are “hot”.

After their meal, they picked up their helmet and left. Their helmet… no, they were not policemen… they were… construction workers. No disrespect to construction workers but, that bunch there didn’t look very pleasant.

If we think that the “rich Arabs” are flocking here because they like our culture and weather and the “rich ang mohs” are flocking here because of our Malaysia-truly-Asia slogan, we might just have to think again.

By the way, I heard that Filipino maids here are those who can't make it in Hong Kong and prostitutes here are those who can't make it in Geylang.

Oh well, I guess I am over judgemental. What say you?

Remembering Valentine

Regular AZAIG readers will know that I spent my Valentine in London this year. I was seconded there for slightly more than 2 months. Me and Jules decided that we do not want to be ripped off by the fancy restaurants there which charge £££ so we decided to have dinner at our apartment. Actually, I don’t mind paying but Jules is an understanding wife, she doesn’t need to go out and eat just for the sake of Valentine.

And so, Zewt has to get into his cooking mode once again…


I’ve always enjoyed cooking. I cooked almost everyday when I was in London despite staying alone for about 3 weeks. Maybe I should open up a restaurant one day… what say you?


First dish on the menu during Valentine was self-mashed potatoes. Still remember how I did it when I was in Uni. Boil… mash… add milk… some salt… butter… some herbs… voila…


Next on the menu was the “Pan Fried Asparagus with Mushrooms and Garlic”. Fried with olive oil with a generous portion of butter will give you an excellent fragrance. The asparagus in London was so fresh, absolutely wonderful. One tip --- never wash the mushroom; you have to gently peel off the skin.


The main dish was “Roast Lamb” marinated with rosemary. Add a little bit of wine, gives you a nice aroma. But I have no idea how long I needed to roast it so…


There, all the food nicely placed on the table ready for a nice romantic dinner. The soup originated from a can so no point highlighting it. I think the whole thing caused me less than £35 if I am not mistaken. Not that bad for London prices if you ask me.


And this is how it looks like as Zewt attempted to professionally lay the food on a plate. I think it should look better than this… must be the camera… hehe…


And of course, dessert to end the evening…


Dessert was from Marks & Spencer though… hehe…

A different level in 'going dutch'

“Mei Kok Sik”

That’s how my parents call it, or used to call it. It simply means ‘going dutch’ which translates to… you pay for your own meal. It is a culture of the west, or that’s what I was made to believe. I am sure it is something very common amongst us nowadays. I mean, you don’t expect others to pay for your own meals right?

When I spent 2 months in London not too long ago, there were a few friends who took me out for dinner and were generous enough to pay for my meals. “You’re a guest”… that’s what they told me. Of course, I met up with them more than once in the course of 2 months and certainly, I don’t expect them to pay for me all the time.

Here in Malaysia, when it is time to pay, one of us will usually have to fork out the money first, either by cash or credit card and he/she will claim the relevant amount from the rest… right? It was in a restaurant called “4 Seasons”, one dubbed to have the best duck in the world where I discovered a very unique way of ‘going dutch’.
In London, people don’t usually carry huge amount of cash around. If you carry £50, that is considered a lot of cash and you risk getting mugged. Therefore, most of the Londoners use debit cards and every transaction has to be verified by a PIN. Same goes with credit cards.

After having a nice dinner in “4 seasons”, we asked for the bill and guess what… everyone started throwing their cards to the bill. I was like… errr… who is going to pay first? Well, ya’ know what? In London, you can actually ask the waiter to swipe each individual card for a specific amount so when the bill comes, everyone just dumped their cards on the paying plate and the captain will come to the table with a wireless credit card machine (which is very common) and he will swipe every single card to the amount requested by the card owner.

Yup… apparently, this is a very common practice and there were instances where more than 10 cards were used to pay a bill and the captain will gladly swipe every card with a smile on his face. Coming back to the meal we had, I paid cash and 2 person paid with cards and some decided to pay for someone and so, it was all different amount… and the captain was patiently swiping the cards and smiling at us…

Just imagine doing that here in Malaysia… anyone want to try? Do share with me your experience thereafter.

Some info on the UK “Work and Travel” visa and UK contract employment

A lot of Malaysians (and Asians) are flocking into London under this scheme called ‘Work and Travel Visa’ (“W&T”); one which is valid for a period of 2 years from the date of entry. It basically allows you to work for one year and thereafter, you are supposed to spend the money you earned to travel for the other.

While some are genuinely taking this visa to work and travel, many are also using this as a stepping stone to secure a permanent job. With a permanent job, comes a work permit which of course, allows them to stay in UK longer than 2 years, or for good if they so wish.

The general concern in Malaysia is whether a holder of this visa will be able to secure a job during the 1 year they are allowed to work. This is a valid concern bearing in mind that if you bring your RM to survive in UK, it amounts to almost nothing. So is this W&T visa worth the risk?

From the little more than 2 months I spent in London, I think that the job market here is not that bad. Contract based job is quite easy to secure IF you have an accounting qualification and experience. Have to say sorry if you are a fresh grad. Guess you have to slog for a few years in Malaysia before making the grade.

In Malaysia, if you have a contract job, it means you are not good enough to secure a permanent role. Of course, I disagree with this as I think this is another moronic self-degrading Asian thinking.

Here in London, contract roles are very common and a lot of W&T visa holders take on contract roles. In fact, a lot of people prefer contract jobs. Let me quote what a contractor told me…

“First, as a contractor, I get my bonus upfront, second I pay lower taxes, third I can go on holiday whenever I want, forth I don’t need to fight with anyone for higher increment/targets…”

When that person said ‘I get my bonus upfront’, it doesn’t mean a contractor gets a lump sum upon joining a fee. This simply means the hourly pay is higher compared to other permanent employees. Reason being a contractor usually doesn’t get other benefits such as medical, annual leave, bonus (of course), etc.

I am sure many are curious how much a contractor gets paid. Well, someone with around my experience can command about £40-£45 per hour working as a contractor. Please, don’t start converting, not yet. With 7 working hours a day at £40 per hour and taking an average of 21 working days a month, that is about £5,880 per month before tax.

On average, 35% will be deducted; either as tax or other contributions and with that, the net pay is about £3,822. There are 2 autonomous consumptions which you must spend, i.e. rent and transport. On average, £800 for rent and bills will be enough. A 1 month travel pass is £95 and it gives you unlimited travel on the underground and buses in zone 1 to zone 4. This would translate to a net disposable income of £2,927 per month.

I am not going to tell you how much £££ I spend a month but I can assure that £1,000 a month is more than enough, even with entertainment. I will blog about expenses comparison like the one I did for HK very soon. Let’s say you are a heavy spender and you go up to as high as £1,500 a month on expenditure. That will still give you a monthly net saving of £1,427.

Now my friends, you can convert. Your savings based on the latest average exchange rate of £1 = RM6.3 is RM8,990 per month. If you are not a heavy spender and spend only £1,000 per month, your savings will be £1,927 = RM12,140… per month. Let’s say an average, RM10,000 a month is saved, that would mean RM120,000 a year.

How long do you think you need to work in Malaysia to amass savings of such magnitude? This is why so many capable professionals are flocking to UK. I would love it too, but my plan is the land of down under. But for those who have made a professional mistake and are thinking of correcting it, this is your opportunity…

Some general modern slavery comparison

It is something I have never felt before in a very long time. When I woke up in the morning in the last few weeks… I actually look forward to going to work! But as soon as my assignment here is complete (yes, work here can actually finish!!), the e-mails from Malaysia began to flow in… I am brought back to reality that… work sucks.

This is probably stating the obvious but here are some of the general comparisons between here and back home…

Work here also starts at 9am. If you walk in 9.30am, you can still shout ‘good morning’ across the room and everyone shouts back to you in a happy mood.
Work starts at 9am back home. If you walk in at 9.20am, you will get ‘the stare’. If you do it frequently, you will get ‘the lecture’.

On one occasion here, one of my colleagues has to catch an early flight for her holiday and she was allowed to leave at 3pm.
On many occasions back home, one of my colleagues has to “ask for permission” to send her daughter to see the doctor at 7pm… and was denied on several occasions.
On a few occasion here, people can go on leave in the middle of a peak period. If you have to go, you have to go…
Back home, the only reason why you cannot work during peak period is when you’re dead.

Here, when I am given a week to do something, it means the work requires about 35 - 40 hours to be completed.
Back home, when I am given a week to do something, it really means… ‘a week’. Go figure.

Here, meetings are always scheduled latest 3 hours before office hour ends. There are people who will walk out of meetings as they ‘really need to leave on time’.
Back home, meetings can be scheduled as late as 1.5 hour after office hour. And you are ‘expected’ to go.

Here, having lunch with bosses is extremely enjoyable. Conversation usually comprises of 5% work, 10% holiday and 85% about English football.
Back home, you just try not to have lunch with your boss.

Here, the weekends belong to you.
Back home, the weekends belong to you only if your company give it to you… occasionally.

Here, work ends at 5pm and you are free to leave. No one will say a thing. They will even gleefully say ‘goodbye’ to you.
Back home, work ends at 5.45pm. The boss will think you are very free if you leave at 6.45pm. Do that regularly and you are deemed not committed to your work and not a team player.

Here, you can safely say ‘bye-bye’ to your boss and go home.
Back home, you can not say ‘bye-bye’ to anyone until your boss go home.

Here, the days I worked until 6.30pm, my boss here call them ‘late nights’… and we all hate it.
Back home, working till 7 – 8pm is considered normal… and we are supposed to be proud of it.

Here, the boss sometimes asked me to go home early… at about 4.45pm.
Back home, the boss also sometimes ask me to go home early… 7pm.

There are many more other differences which I will blog in details in the very near future. When I am back in Malaysia, I can only dream of such working culture. And I know a lot of Malaysians will conveniently brand those in the west as ‘lazy’. Well, is it a case of them being lazy? Or us being stupid?

London Chinese New Year discovery

I was invited to a Chinese New Year dinner gathering last Saturday by KT. It was held on a Saturday as all of us Malaysian Chinese here had to work during CNY, no holiday for us poor souls.
It was held in a nice double storey house, rent by 4 Malaysians currently working in London. As more and more guests arrived, I realised it is more like a gathering for Malaysian accountants!

One of the hosts is the brother of my ex-schoolmate. I also bumped into some of my former colleagues and my former classmates, all currently working in London… all accountants. There was also this junior from my

By the 9pm or so, the whole house was swamped with Malaysians… all accountants… all wishing each other ‘xing nian kuai le’, subtly moving our feet and head to the CNY tunes playing from the hi-fi system.

I believe one of the main reasons why Malaysians still choose to remain in Malaysia is the presence of families and close friends; and of course the food. But when I sat at one corner and observed all that was going on in the house that day; I realised that those reasons and slowly but surely diminishing.

If Malaysians think moving overseas will result in loneliness, think again. There is really a very closely knitted Malaysians community here and I understand that gathering in this particular house is quite common. There was really a very lively buzz amongst everyone. Loneliness in a foreign land is slowly becoming a myth; at least here in London.

After telling people there that I am only here for a short stint, I was constantly asked whether I plan to work here permanently. Everyone was just so enthusiastic about working here and earning £, you just know that they will all be here for a really long time. I also know for a fact that a lot of Malaysians are in the process of getting jobs here.

Of course, there is the regular chat about the political scene in Malaysia. As expected, everyone there is utterly pissed about things back in Malaysia and there is a general consensus that things will only get worse. Personally, I feel it is such a sad fact that all these talented accountants are plying their trade in a foreign land and only have bad things to say about home. But then again, the phrase “I love my country but my country does not love me” again comes into play…

Besides good food, enlightening fellowship amongst Malaysians, a CNY gathering will never be complete without a good gambling session. Gambling in £, though not my first time; it is certainly very nervous looking at the cards in your hand. I made £11 and went home happy…

Last not but least… guess who I found amidst the CNY celebration in London?
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You pee, I pee, he pees, she pees

I celebrated the millennium here in London and I will always remember how it went. It’s a very fond memory not just because I spent it in a foreign land and watching fantastic fireworks in the chilly winter night; but also because of a very peculiar thing.

I remember the evening started with me and my uni-mates all stuck in the tube as there were delays everywhere. Not surprising considering the amount of people heading to central London at that time. Our arrival in central London was greeted with a barrage of people. We don’t know where were heading, we just followed the crowd.

It was after about an hour that some of us began to feel uneasy… we need to take a piss. Now, those who have been to London will know that there are 2 things which are akin to treasure in London. The first is a dustbin, and the other… toilet. Yes, you hardly find these two things in central London. I heard it was a measure to prevent terrorist placing bombs there.

So what do you do when a guy needs to go? Well, a guy will go when a guy needs to go. So a bunch of us made our way to the side of the road, headed to the back lane, behind all the tall buildings and you know what? That part of town turned into some giant toilet with so many people taking a piss! And… there were girls too. Hell, they didn’t really care… just pull down their pants and do what a girl needs to do when a girl needs to go.

That was not it…

As we walk further… and drink water as we walked along, the urge to go came again. But this time, there wasn’t any building we can go too as we were really at the heart of London and really nowhere to go. It was then that a friend of mine spotted a bush not too far away.

And so, we squeezed our way through the crowd and headed to that bush… quite a big bush I would say. It’s one where you can actually duck and walk into it, which was exactly what we did. And guess that… just as I walked in… I was greeted by 3 girls… squatting there… doing their business… and you know what they said to me?

“Hello dear… you gotta wait for your turn…”

The weekend gem

For some strange reason, I have been waking up relatively early compared to normal. Back in KL, I would set my alarm at 8am, and it will be snoozed till at least 8.40am before I actually get up. But here in London, I have been getting up at 8am. And you know what? I have been preparing breakfast! Twice I had cut pears with yogurt… absolutely yummy-licious and gosh… sooooooo healthy!

Anyway, a lot of people have been asking me to blog about the working culture here in London. Trust me; this topic is something I will definitely touch on. But ya know, I think it is too soon to actually talk about the working culture here after just 1 week. All I can say is that everyday is a learning experience… everyday, I see more and more differences between the working life here in London compared to back home. I will blog more in detail perhaps next week.

But there is one thing I noticed by just being here for 1 week. Weekends are very important for the people here. I have blogged about the evolution of weekends to us modern slaves but to the people here, it is certainly a whole new level.

For a start, people have big plans for weekends; and working is definitely NOT part of the plan. People will take time to travel around during weekend. For more of us back home, working during weekends is is pretty normal, though not to me. Talk about weekend usually starts from Thursday lunch time.

Come weekend, when I went out with my friends and bump into come familiar faces, people NEVER talk about work. Weekend is a time away from work… like totally away from work. Those biting about bosses and how you cannot meet deadlines and how Monday will be a dreadful time… such things are non-existent in people’s mind here.

Oh, I went to a nice bar by the Thames last Saturday with KT and had this beer called Cider. With a distinct apple taste, you can drink it easily. But after a few gulps, you will begin to feel its effect. Another good drink I must say.
Anyway, come Monday; everyone will certainly ask you how your weekend went and everyone has a story to tell and it makes you wonder… was it a weekend or was it a whole week off for these people.

This is one thing very apparent here in London. I can see the joy in all my friends’ eyes when I met up with them over the weekend and they are just so happy working here. No one seems to have any plan to return home, at least not in the immediate future. Even if they do, they intend to work in Singapore, definitely not in the Malaysian modern slavery kingdom.

And hey… one is eligible to apply for residency after 5 years working here… and I have a gut feeling that most if not all of my friends will be applying.

** A year ago and 5 days ago today, Zewt blogged about “They said it’s just a number”.

Experiencing Hillsong in London

Cooking rice yesterday was a challenge as my apartment doesn’t have a rice cooker. So KT came over early in the morning today to drop me his spare rice cooker. Thereafter, we headed to Tottenham Court Road station via the Central Line. As soon we went up exit 3 from that station, it was right in front of us… Hillsong Church London.
The church is currently based in a theatre, so it was quite dark. When we reached, the service has already started and it took a while before we found empty seats on the right side of the theatre church.

I have never been to a Hillsong service before; but the praise & worship (“P&W”) was just like what I have expected… very vibrant, very energetic, very passionate worship leader and… very concert-like. I have never sung any of the songs before but it doesn’t take long to pick it up. Sorry God for not concentrating during the P&W as I was busy snapping pictures along the way. It was awesome.

After P&W, there was a short time of prayer and then it was offering time and a dude came up to give a testimony about how his debts were wiped off after he tithed; pretty normal. After that, they prayed for someone who was about to get married. I think that someone, whose name is Grant (I think) is a youth pastor or something.

Then, I heard something really… different. A guy (dunno who he is) came up and talked about the forthcoming Valentines Day. He also called it the “Singles Awareness Day”. In conjunction with Singles Awareness Day, the church will be organising a party in a place called Passion… a local dance club. No kidding… the church is organising a clubbing party in a dance club… called Passion… on Valentines Day! How cool is that!?!?!

KT said it’s pretty normal. Clubbing is a form of celebration. I wouldn’t disagree. But I wonder if there will be alcohol and all. It would be interesting to attend as all, singles and attached (and married) are invited; but I don’t think I will be making it as I will be Paris that weekend. And you know what? That youth pastor Grant, who is about to get married… met his soon-to-be wife in the Valentine Clubbing session last year! Man… he is fast!

The pastor’s name is Gareth; if I am not mistaken and the message today was a continuation from last week’s message which I didn’t attend. But I think I managed to follow through and it was quite a simple and yet powerful message.

One point dropped into my take-away bag as I find it very relevant. He said the church is the body of Christ; and are people coming to know God because of the church?... Or are people staying away from God because of the church. A very simple point but yet, it is just so relevant in today’s world. I find it very relevant to the current Malaysian church arena, particular in the Klang Valley.

Anyway, I am not about to summarise the whole sermon here so… when the service was over, I went to the toilet and it was then I noticed a sign said… “cameras prohibited”… Opppsss… but KT said it should be applicable only during plays in the theatre, not the church… Phew…

Overall, it was quite a pleasant experience and I would certainly come again, if time permits. If you are staying in London and is looking for a more open minded church, this is certainly a place to be… I mean, clubbing organised by the church! What more you want? *grinned*

After church, we headed to Portobello Market. The actual market was not opened today (Sunday) but there were still a lot of shops to provide an interesting view. That will be a story for another day.

London Friday night out

If you think the Friday bug is strong in Malaysia, think again. My first Friday working experience has been quite amazing. I have been told that the people here leave right on the dot on a Friday and this is relatively true. I managed to leave at about 5.15pm, but that’s probably because I already completed what I needed to do. That’s one thing here I like more… if you’ve finished your work, you’re free to go.

I already made arrangement with 2 of my buddies, KT and KK to have dinner and hang around town for the night. After changing to more comfortable clothes at my apartment, off I go on the famous London underground…

We decided to go for dinner at the infamous “Wong Kee” in Chinatown. This place is famous for its appalling customer service, sometimes outright rude. But then again, hordes and hordes of people will flock to this place to have a meal. Reason…? This place is one of the best if you want value for money.

A quick look at the menu and I think it has not changed since I last came 7 years ago! Anyway, we ordered the following dishes…

Stir fried ‘choy sum’ - £4.
Fried ‘tofu’ with minced pork - £3.50.
Roasted duck with assorted vegetables - £8.

The food is not too bad; certainly edible. For this price, you can't complain. Check out the price. Imagine if you earn £ here, don’t you think the food is cheap?

We walked around Leicester Square f.k.a. Chinatown after dinner. The place was bustling with activities yesterday, just like how it was 7 years ago. I guess Chinese are also populating this place at an incredible rate. There was a long queue in front of a particular restaurant. It is one which I will pay a visit when Jules arrive… the duck specialist… Four Seasons; who opened a branch in Leicester Square.

Those who have been in London will know this place offers arguably the best duck in the world. The second best, to me at least, is Sunrise in Sea Park, Petaling Jaya.

We walk around Leicester Square and Covent Garden. Walking around brought back a lot of memories. The feeling of hey-I-have-been-here before was quite apparent.

I noticed something when walking around...that a lot of people crowding around outside bars instead of inside. KT said that bars in London are smoke-free so all the smokers have to go out to smoke. Smoke… Free… Bar!!! This is so cool.
After a while, we decided to find a place for a drink and to continue our conversation. KT brought us to this place called Meza Bar. It’s a more up class kind of bar, with people from the professional world making up the crowd.

This place is famous for cocktails. After me and KT had a beer, we decided to try some cocktails. Noticed the bar tender kept making this particular drink. A quick check with him and found out that the hottest drink of the night was ‘Mojito’ (pronounced mo-hi-to). I gave that a try and KT ordered something called ‘Old Fashioned’.
Verdict: Mojito was very nice and Old Fashioned was very… strong!

The conversation revealed that there are easily 30-40 people whom I know who are currently working in London. From the way I see it; plenty have decided to return to Malaysia... NOT! Why? Cause some of them have actually bought properties here. Yeah, propertIES. I guess the brain drain problem in Malaysia is really worsening by the minute. And honestly, I am very happy to contribute to that. Can't wait to be more accurate.

The crowd began to come in at about 11pm but we decided to leave as we do not want to miss the last tube. We made our ways to the nearest tube station and went our separate ways. I was greeted by a busker in one of the inter-change station. The air in the underground is as filthy as ever but it’s the most efficient way of travel so… can't complain.
Will be heading to Hillsong Church which has a branch here in London this Sunday. Exciting!