Remember, he is a m…naire…

Please note that this is a true story. It may sound bizarre, but it is.

There is this guy, he is a millionaire. This is not an April fool joke, he is a real millionaire. He actually inspected a property on Friday and a decision to purchase it was made by Monday. S&P was signed the following week. Not possible? Let me tell you that it is, because he paid with cash. I shall not go into further details but trust me, he is a millionaire.

However, you will find his lifestyle rather… let me just illustrate it to you as I am unable to find word to describe it…

You would expect this millionaire to be driving a luxury car, right? The answer is no. Technically speaking, he is driving a Japanese car. But, I am very sure you and I would rather drive a Kancil than driving his “Japanese car”. He is driving a Datsun that looks like the picture. I am not sure what the model is. But then again, I wonder whether you have even heard of Datsun. But remember, he is a millionaire.

But then of course, he doesn’t drive to work. Petrol is expensive. So he drives to the nearest LRT station and park his car there. But it’s not a proper parking lot, parking is expensive. The car will be parked at the side of the road; ya’ know, that patch of mud beneath the LRT track? There he shall park his car. Guess he doesn’t have to worry about car theft or damage with his Datsun. But remember, he is a millionaire.

Next on the line: mobile-phone. I understand he used to carry a Nokia 3210. Yes, I bet many of you don’t even know how it looks like. It was actually my very first model. He has since upgraded, I believe it’s a second-hand phone. He changed not because he wanted a new phone, it was because the battery for the 3210 is no longer in production. Again, I don’t know what the “new” model is. All I can say is that is has the old colour-less monochrome screen. Guess maxis can forget about him joining the iPhone craze. But remember, he is a millionaire.

And so he has a phone, and yet, he doesn’t have a phone. More accurately, he somewhat intentionally restricts the mobility of his mobile-phone. Yes, he doesn’t carry his handphone around. But then again, just like anyone of us, he needs to make calls. How does he do it? He borrows someone else’s phone. But remember, he is a millionaire.

There was a time, he was sent overseas for an assignment. This person (remember, he is a millionaire) wanted to call his father. You know that he did? He used the phone in the office he was based in… called the Malaysian office (because he couldn’t call his father directly from where he was)… asked his colleague to call his father using another office phone. So this colleague was carrying 2 phones with the millionaire on one line and the father on the other going…

Millionaire (M) to colleague (C) : Can you tell my father to do this this this?
C to M’s father (F) : M asked you to do this this this.
F to C : Ok, I will do this this this.
C to M : Your father said he will do this this this.
M to C : Can you also tell him… … …
C to F : … …
But remember, he is a millionaire.

By now, I am sure most if not all of you would expect his house to be Astro-less. And of course, you are right! But ya’ know, even if you are willing to sponsor this person (millionaire you know!) his Astro installation and monthly subscription, he will not be able to enjoy it. This is because his current model of his tv is one which do not have a video input or function. It is one where you need to walk to the tv and press on the buttons on the tv to change channel. To those of you who are born in the 80s, yes, such “thing” does exist. But hey, at least it is a colour tv… yay!! People are beginning to feel weird why it is not black and white.

There are also many other interesting things, such as he is aware of which hotel offering their cakes at 50% at which time on which day during the week. He also appears to be wearing the same shirt almost everyday. To go through all of them would result in a novel, a non-fiction one. I guess we only need to remember one thing… that he is a millionaire.

P/S: Sorry, he is already married.
P/S/S: Yes, inviting him for wedding dinner will probably break the Guinness World Record in terms of “biggest” ang-pow of the year.


1 year ago… The prank that went wrong… more valuable than gold