Thursday 29 May 2008

Ask before you hump?

I think I took more time reading the comments in my previous entry than writing it. My “twin”, Johnson Tee said he took nearly 2 hours to pen his first comment. As always, AZAIG encourages debate so it is certainly healthy. But I have to admit, my brain tends to slow down as Friday draws near and it will certainly be difficult for me to reply all the intellectually written comments.

And since it is Friday, I think I would like to touch on something lighter.

The recent thumping and humping entries led to a certain discussion between me and some of my friends/colleagues. The question is… should a guy ask before he has sex with a girl? Obviously, we are talking about a couple doing it for the first time and they aren’t married. Before I continue, I would like to reiterate that I do not condone pre-marital sex but at the same time, I do not have the right to tell you not to do it. It’s your choice.

So yeah… should a guy ask before he humps?

Most girls said yes, they believe a guy should ask before making the plunge. Regardless that you already know the answer, you should still ask. Of course, if it is a purely sexually driven relationship, I don’t think there is any need in asking. But, I just find it awkward to actually sort of seek permission before you do the deed. Do you say…

“Hey darling, should we do some bedroom exercise tonight?” or “Hey baby, I think it’s time for us to do deed. How about tonight?” or “Sweetie, should we enhance our love by making some tonight?” or in the most straight forward manner… “We’re f**king tonight ok?”
And if you get the green light, you plan for a night of glory. I don’t know about you but I just find it a bit awkward. Maybe that’s just me. I think if it is to happen, it will happen rather naturally. And if it is to happen naturally, do you still ask? Some girls actually said yes… you must still ask.

What? Imagine this…

Your hands are all over each other…
While kissing, both landed on the bed…
You begin to strip each other…
Both of you are stark naked…
Hands wondering freely…
The guy is already on top…
The girl spread and the guy takes position…
Then suddenly the guy stop ask… “Can I put it in ah?”

You don’t do that, do you? Imagine the girl say no, that would probably put life to the phrase “potong steam”.

And… imagine the girl says yes and the guy says… “Nah, some other day. Let’s dress up”. Is there a phrase call “potong juice?”

50 comments:

Observer said...

hahahhaha

Anonymous said...

errm... i think if the situation is so 'natural' probably no need to ask. but if they talk about not doing it before marriage, then no need to ask already coz not doing it anyway.. but if hmm.. i also dunno la.. very complicated..depending on the couples?

Anonymous said...

I think it should happen naturally and it's not REALLY that necessary to ask lah. If i don't want to have sex, then i'll just say it out..

Especially for adults, we should know what we are doing.

At 'high' situation, suddenly ask that question “Can I put it in ah?” is really "potong steam" and actually it sounds dumb :)

If it's were me, just cut the crap and start humping! HAHA!

leyaw said...

potong juice! hahaha......*golek'ing on the floor*..hahaha.....

Shiveeleaves said...

nike,just do it?
love the pic so much.

day-dreamer said...

Unless it's mutual I think a couple should find some time to talk about their perceptions towards sex.

Rashikaps said...

Oh! They weren't done getting permission, agreeing et all in the park, eh? tsk tsk! :)

Anonymous said...

Potong juice don't have.... potong steam got lar....

as for asking.. I think it should be discussed in advance lor... Not 'ask' at the moment it happens... because.. there's always things like contraception that has to be worried about... if they wait until just before actual conjugation to worry about it, it may be too late... the 'urge' may be larger than the 'rational brain' can control. If you read those girly mag, or agony aunt, or even sex advice websites... they always advice you to talk about it soon, once you start feeling close enough that its a possibility, its important to talk about it BEFORE you do it. The couple needs to talk about in an erm.. unerotic way before they go near to that stage.

My two cents... from reading too many sex ed websites, rofl..

flaminglambo said...

HAHAHAHA!!! when my wife and i were dating, i remember asking her to be my gf. she called me a dork for doing that.

asking for permission to dirty dance? i might have done so if i hadn't been scarred by her calling me a dork.

then again, when my bruce banner becomes incredible hulk, he does the thinking. i'm just an attachment.

myop101 said...

need not ask la...

you need to know the rhythm before you can play the instrument...

Anonymous said...

seek and you shll find, ak and you might get the answer .. ha ha ha ..

well honestly I think asking is the polite way. that is before anything goes wrong, but if you dun mind things go wrong, well .. what can I say?

Just do it la

Huei said...

hahahahahhaha

i think the question should be asked before getting hands everywhere n naked! =P

ManaL said...

The girls only "geram and bosan" in the middle of it when she hasnt arrived yet the man has claimed victory, chanting 'oo god, yes' (surprisingly religious when committing sins, how ironic or was it just thanking god for pure, "adulterated" pleasure?)....

U may actually ask....but in a foreplay way, as in start brushing ur Shakespeare, or usman awang or whatever beautiful thing to say, or just do physical foreplay and add words like "baby u r so hot, i love u so much"....u know , those things can just ignite more fire inside her body. But if the man said: "some other time"...he's either showing his ultimate rudeness or he just failed to get his bruce banner angry (borrowing terms from flaminglambo) which would cause a definite ROTFLMAO to the girl after all the advances the guy gave her earlier

BTW, u that "gersang", zewt? Or is it just something u wud find relaxing to share things with us now that u r a Lo-kong (is that the right spelling for hubby)...;-D
I keep coming to humping entries lately in AZAIG.

missironic said...

hahaha...potong juice..tat's funny..new term learned..

i tink the best way to answer is.."tengok keadaan la"..hahaaha..

Anonymous said...

How many guys will actually honour the gal's request to stop when she ask to potong juice/steam? Couples should consider the consequences and oh yeah... unexpected promotions! if they're not careful. Promote jadi Mama and Papa too early... Hehe...

kyh said...

Hahahahaa!!! That pic is so awesome!!!

I always wonder how the hell did u dig those pics up! :P

Anonymous said...

wakakakakakakaka.....jahat la u...but is really funny!!
i learnt a new phrase today!!

Purple~MushRooM said...

Zewt, did you ask?

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

very good 1 i must admit..but really would be awkward rite? or like u bluntly put..potong steam kao kao lar...

so free for dinner on tuesday?

khengsiong said...

No forcing - yes; Asking - not necessary. (In Western countries, men can be charged for 'raping' wives.)

Sex is something emotional, not logical. Well, unless you make love solely for the purpose of procreation.

Seaqueen said...

Wah! Seems like an interesting topic for the coming weekend, especially for those who are planning to do "the deed" for the first time. Hahhaha!!!

Little Jennifer said...

lol~ guess it happens naturally....if ask, it sounds weird...the guy might being rope in prohibitant upon religion's faith for many years...>_<" hahaha...i thought only~

Acute Critique said...

hahahahahahaha~

*ROTFLOL*

Anonymous said...

this is the funniest post i've gone through so far. funny la you heehe. i think a guy should ask... but it's what his sentence is like that's important...

zewt said...

Freethinker - hehehe...

cbenc12 - depends on the situation too.

seokthong - hahaha... if he potong your juice, how ah?

leyaw - hehehe... let's intro that phrase to the world!

Shieveeleaves - yup... that was an actual advertisement pic from nike.

day-dreamer - dont u find that awkward? i just cant see myself doing it.

zewt said...

rashikaps - that's the problem with red tape :)

Theodwyn - but i really cant see myself talking about it. i mean... how do u even bring it up? i think it's really an awkward thing.

flaminglambo - hahaha... why la, were u a dork then? wah... it's dangerous when it's a hulk... it loses control.

myop101 - hahahahaha... where do u learn about rhythm then?

cibol - geee... that verse was our cell group discussion yesterday :P

huei - how did your boo ask u ah?

zewt said...

Manal - if till that stage and bruce banner is still... bruce banner, there is really a serious problem already. hahaha... certainly more relaxed now :)

missironic - in that keadaan, better dont ask eh?

pinknpurplelizard - that's true... in that situation, if the girl says no... i think it will be almost impossible to stop.

kyh - forwarded mail my friend... :)

jacss - hehe... where got jahat?

purple mushroom - nope.

zewt said...

constant craver joe - this tuesday should be ok. will drop u a sms.

khengsiong - well, humans and dolphins are they only 2 creatures in the world where sex is performed for pleasure... so... says a lot of things huh.

seaqueen - HAHAHAHA... hit the nail there.

sugarbaby - celibacy? hehe...

Acute Crique - :P :P

ArMs - hello, welcome to AZAIG. so... what is the perfect of asking? :P

the girl said...

oh my lord...so potong stim one! for the sake of god, just do it la!

Anonymous said...

Good grief! Jules been away too long...it's pretty obvious!!! Now u are all horny!!! Should change ur name to Zwetlebert Humpadick!!!! Hahahahahahahaha!!!!

Anonymous said...

Haha, me? I just pray none of us will ever have to taste that potong juice and kena potong steam only... Lol.

Enemy of the Republic said...

Boy, I've been out of it. I didn't know this was going on in the blogosphere. Why should it be Hump Day? Everyday should be Hump Day!

missironic said...

hahahaa..ya..totally ruin the whole mood..then bcome awkward..lolz..

Dan-yel said...

Hey Zewt, it just occur to me, we should meet up before you leave Malaysia for good. Tell me when you're leaving ya...

Best regards,
From the one who is die-hard preparing for his last paper on Monday!

ardy said...

Hahaha, now that is funny!

But seriously man, don't ask. Just do it. You will know when the moment is right, it's all about timing. Unless of course the girl is having her period and horny as well, then you're in deep shit! And I mean, deep shit, if you get what I mean ;) LOL

-ritchie- said...

haha.. i think no need to ask coz i never ask also.. if the girl dun wan she will stop u from taking off her clothes and stop u from raba-raba-ing.. wat if u ask then the situation become like..

the guy : can i put it in?
the girl : aiyak.. i period la.. forgot.. soli soli..

-ritchie- said...

haha.. i think no need to ask coz i never ask also.. if the girl dun wan she will stop u from taking off her clothes and stop u from raba-raba-ing.. wat if u ask then the situation become like..

the guy : can i put it in?
the girl : aiyak.. i period la.. forgot.. soli soli..

Pak Zawi said...

zewt,
The body language involved can be considered as asking for permission "May I"and "permission granted, so please proceed". There is no need for words in such acts.

dreamie said...

HAHAhaaaa... potong juice...
do the gentleman thingy
ASK rite from the beginning,
before you ignite the fire...
errrmm less painful? .. kkkkkkk

Cherry Popcorn said...

Woah.. lots of humping entries huh! =P

zewt said...

pamina - hahaha... that's the way to do it.

suituapui - shhhhh....

Kenny Mah - hahaha... you'll never know...

Enemy of the Republic - hahaha... can be tiring u know. cant hump all day.

missironic - go get a drink later hehe...

Dan-yel - hey! wont be leaving so soon. will let you know. all the best!

ardy - hahahaha... head the shit way eh?

-ritchie- - wahhh... u never ask... u very experience eh?

Zawi - and i shall remember that :)

dreamie - but sometimes, we like to spark it up...

princess shin - hehe... nice right?

myop101 said...

inborn my friend...inborn...:P

Huei said...

ask wat? *acts innocent* hahahha

oh i have one of the cause of kids humping at an early age.

parents who allow them to drink at the age of...13!? i think 13..the other night while having dinner with my boo's family..his relatives..one 13yr old little girl was going around with her glass of beer, knocking on every adult's cup, then refilling, and doing the same again...

now the question is..WHO humps them? people of the same age, or those adults?

(ps. not a close relative..probably relatives of his relatives..er..ok this is complicating!)

Anonymous said...

Lol. sometimes you don't have to ask. When the gf start telling about babies, went shopping for baby clothes yesterday... if that guy is not ready for commitment but just wan to satisfy his lust, he will pandai pandai avoid u lor.

Bcos baby = responsibility = commitment = marriage = doom day for most guys.

zewt said...

myop101 - woooah... inborn!!

huei - woooaaah... 13!!!! starting them young eh??? terrible la.

littlepolaris - dont la... i dont see it as doomsday.

Ping said...

If it's wet, it's open invitation.

zewt said...

Ping - the guy has to touch before he knows if she is wet right?

Ping said...

Zewt, for sure. While you at it, give it a good stir.

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It won't really have success, I consider so.

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