6 months have passed since I arrived here in Singapore. If I have to go through probation, I will be facing the moment of reckoning. But since it is somewhat an internal transfer, I am a confirmed staff the moment I arrived in Singapore.
And you know what? I am actually quite glad I don’t have to go through probation…
When I first got the job, and knowing that you were selected from a rather big pool of people both internally and externally – top that up with a bit of self-belief that I was above average in terms of thinking outside the box, a relatively fast thinker and fairly technical, I did felt a bit almighty about myself.
Like I mentioned earlier, I was swimming very well in the Malaysian waters and Straits of Malacca, and I thought I would definitely survive if they decide to throw me into the South China Sea. Instead, I was thrown into the Pacific Ocean.
And now, I found one something else… everyone who was thrown into the Pacific together with me seem to be able to swim and float much better than me!
What I am trying to say is… the world outside Malaysia is freaking big, much bigger than I imagined it to be. The working individuals around me are a collection of crème-de-la-crème. Everyone is good at what they do, everyone is efficient, everyone works hard. I do not like to use the word “competitive”, because I don’t think my colleagues are such.
Somewhat sad to say… the knowledge, expertise and experience I gained while in Malaysia is not that useful in the international scene. Even in certain situation where it was useful, the knowledge and expertise of those gained by people from Europe and America seems to carry more weight.
For a few months, I was struggling just to keep my head above the water, trying to avoid being drowned not by the quantum of work given to me, but rather the complexity.
And while trying to solve these issues, I am often left amazed by my colleagues. Everything that I thought I was fairly good at, most of them are better than me. And those one level above me are really geniuses. I dunno… maybe I am just dumb.
I am beginning to find my footing in this new world, or should I say… building enough muscles and stamina to swim and float in the Pacific Ocean. But certainly, there is plenty to be learned.
1 year ago… Read
2 years ago… To capture the rapture
3 years ago… Appreciating life