Wednesday, 15 August 2007

Types of accidents

When there is a mishap, it’s called an accident.

When such a mishap involves 2 or more cars on the road, it’s called a traffic accident.

When such a mishap involves your car ramming into someone’s car’s butt and you have to pay for it, it’s called an always-your-fault traffic accident.

When such a mishap involves someone’s car ramming into your car’s butt and he has to pay for it, it’s called an inconvenient traffic accident.

When such a mishap involves someone’s car ramming into your car’s butt and he runs away, it’s called a bad luck, but still a traffic accident.

When such a mishap involves you falling asleep on your wheel due to excessive over-time, it’s called an I-am-a-stupid-modern-slave traffic accident.

When such a mishap involves your car and someone’s car ramming into each other and both of you cannot explain why you ram into each other and so happen it takes place in this particular month, it’s called a hungry ghost festival traffic accident.

When such a mishap causes death, it’s a tragic accident.

When such a mishap causes a multiple death, it’s a very tragic accident.

When such a mishap causes multiple deaths with the driver having 2 arrest warrants and 13 unsettled summonses and plying on a permit-less route… ladies and gentlemen, that is called a Malaysian traffic accident.

And… … … by the time we enjoy our holiday on the 31st, the above shall be a forgotten accident.

30 comments:

Helen said...

Woot woot first here.

Yeah, biasa. Something happened, everybody starts to point their fingers. ;-(

Tine said...

It's so sad to say that you've hit the nail on the head. Sigh :(

Shireen Loh said...

Why no pictures? Where are them pictures? I expect pictures...kekeke...

narrowband said...

Is the driver at fault? Lemme tell ya, the Ministry of Transport (and govt, for that matter) are the most guilty ones. Enforcement is practically down to zero-level.

FriendfromTaiwan said...

So standard, such a reckless disregard for life or safety that malaysians show every day, being on the road shows the worst in every malaysian regardless of race, age or sex, Everyone is a just a fucking lunatic, dashing in between spaces, unable to keep to one line and always drifitng into the side of your car, and of course the hated MAT REMPIT. And the yet the government still encourages malaysians to buy more of their Shitty 30 year old design death traps with zero safety features and technology that was outdated at the same time that Disco went out, while public transport in KL consists of 3 old buses and some smelly taxi's driven by the winners of the "rudest man in the world contest". Amazingly still everyone in Malaysia can still somehow afford to own three of these cars in every household, even on RM700 a month! Then they drive them on the poorly maintained roads with their worthless licenses that were bought for a few hundred bucks, lacking even the most basic safety skills which are common knowledge to species of gibbon in deepest darkest Africa. This truly is the Malaysian Miracle!

Sunshine said...

well, we do live in a country where almost everything can be solved with one cup of coffee :P

its sad... really sad...

btw did you notice one thing? it happened on the first day of the chinese seventh lunar month... eeeeee... scarryyyyy

rinnah said...

And you said you were trying not to blog about it! *grin*

But... nicely put, man! *clap clap clap*

Yes... in a few more days we will have forgotten about it and life goes on as normal. *sigh*

Such is Malaysian life.

SuLee said...

haha never heard of hungry ghost festival traffic accident...

come on lah, dont say until Malaysian driver so scary lahhh

maegen said...

Awesome zewt + awesome point = awesome post !! *clap clap clap 2..* what actually those summons use ?? yeah!!rasuah use ~!!once the summons show $ will withdrawn likes atm!!opps... do i comment too much??i reallydunwantocomment it... haa~~

Cirnelle said...

Its only a Malaysian accident if a public transport licensing board issues licenses without any form of regulatory checks as long as the correct forms are filled and KFC duly supplied.

anigma said...

I saw NST Cover today - there were two hearse carrying the deceased Chinese fella and his wife. I heard that she was heavily 8 months' pregnant. I don't read news, I just browse photos.

It's a grim sight. Everytime such accidents happened, they would recommend list of things.. I still remember the joke when the Nuri crashed. Some top officials commented - we cannot do anything. Let's pray it won't happened again. If that were to happen to himself or his close family, we would sympathize with him and said, Let's pray it won't happen again and see how he feels.

tingtitlei said...

When there is a mishap involves louis's car being rammed, its called "FUCK YOU! PAY ME NOW!"

haha

welcome to malaysia

Kenny Ng said...

Good points! This is how they rated types of accident.

Soulblade said...

ah~ another post regarding of our beloved system eh?

well, the combination of malaysians' driving (so call) 'skills' + hungry ghost festival = bla bla accidents loh...

furthermore, we have too many people that have the tendency to 'follow' all drift-ing, speed-up-and-almost-kiss-your-butt and switching lanes faster than you can say "hey" kind of driving around here.

what to do? all can be settled after a 'cup of coffee/tea'. so 'boleh lah'...

Manal said...

Traffic, road accidents are like god's catastrophic for us malaysians, no?
We dont have much of natural disaster problems apart from floodings, storms, typhoons, and from time to time, landslides.

I am like forever frustrated by the accident casualties amounting to our national statistics. My deepest sympathy goes to the dearly departed families of the recent tragic express coach accident.

adrian said...

The evidence points to the driver speeding and he didn't even slam on his brakes.

This will be forgotten until the next accident.

sooi2 said...

yes. only can be found in the country with tallest building in the world and astronauts painting batik on the moon.

Sunflower said...

I see I am not the only one who is impotently angry.

zewt said...

Helen - the scapegoat has yet to be identified. i guess they probably blame us... for choosing the wrong bus company.

Tine - sad indeed. sigh...

Shireen Loh - might be too gross to show... hehe...

narrowband - who do u think they will blame in the end?

friendfromtaiwan - hahahaha... driven by the winner of the rudest man in the world contest... damn like that one.

Sunshine - not only coffee... teh tarik also can la.

zewt said...

rinnah - did i blog about it? did i? did i? :P....

SuLee - aiyah... u have been away for too long la.

maegen - hahaha... reallydunwantocomment... learning fast eh... the spelling your name is really unique if i have to say it again.

cirnelle - u sure they require forms? hmmm... KFC again? maybe it's durian since it's the durian season.

anigma - if i remember correctly, there is supposed to be a black box installed on buses too. is there one? malaysian style indeed.

tingtitlei - depends who is the other party ler... might not be the case u know hahaha...

zewt said...

kenny ng - absolutely our style right?

soulblade - aiyah... it's call an efficient payment system.... immediate settlement at a discount. better dont say too much.

Manal - are you saying that we should have stuff like these becos we dont have natural disaster?

adrian - i dont think we have to wait till the next accident to forget about this.

sooi2 - hahahaha... yes, only in such a country, where everything is possible.

sunflower - impotently angry.... hahaha... sounds like a futile effort.

ehon said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

im pretty sure the transport minister loves u. :D

Angie Tan said...

lol!!!

i've avoided the newspapers a bit for the past few days.

anyway, looks like the MoT is shifting blame to the company and not on their own department, ala JPJ... (^ ^)

did anyone remember the bad accident at the east coast which killed like 20 people in a van when it hit a lorry or something?

looks like i've started to forget liao..

Anonymous said...

When all a country has are laws but no enforcements, everything will become human "errors" and "tragedies". Or for that matter, some will just proclaim it is an act of God.

Of course, that includes leaking roofs and flooded tunnels, faulty highway (too much sun and rain)....

me said...

hey, this is a good one. was wondering if there was a point to the merry-go-round where voila! you came up with the punchline. i like.

alan zed said...

accident = wrong people + wrong time + wrong place. agree ? ;)

Winn said...

i must admit i m one of those who can fall asleep when driving....and i hate it when it happen. i try whenever and however possible to leave drinks in my car so that i can stay alert...i dowan to kill anyone..realli

zewt said...

ehon - hehe... i can be a spindoctor for them too... will twist this and blame the world if they pay the right price :P

Angie Tan - honesty speaking... forgotten already. i think that's the one where they say they're gonna install some black box in buses right?

anon @ 7.53am - well, God is indeed a mighty person after all :)

me - wahhh... am i reading a praise from u?

alan zed - lack one more element... manage by the wrong ppl.

winn - what's your car plate number? when i see it... i go play far far... should blog and let us all know :P

Calvin's Wife said...

F***ing Arsehole, and because of him, and actually his moronic employer too, others died.

How could you even let that man drive , some more a bus, with many passengers who trusted his driving... damn.. typical Malaysia tidak apa.

zewt said...

calvin's wife - this is malaysia... where the boleh culture prevails... everything also boleh mah.