Friday, 7 December 2007

Guess the blooper...

Recent entries of AZAIG have been rather creepy till some dare not read it in the middle of the night. Well, you don’t know what you are missing, those are true accounts of supernatural phenomena. Hey… I am sure all of you have gone through that let’s-talk-ghost-story when you’re at a trip or at come camps right?

Anyway, Friday is here and nothing is better than a good dosage of laughter. So let us all take a break away from those horror stories and I certainly would not want to make this a creepy Friday.

I don’t watch porn. Well, let me rephrase… I have stopped watching porn since the longest time. I remember a girl forwarded porn stuff to me while I was still at a
Magic School and I actually admonished her nicely. She thought I was joking and trying to act holy. But she was in shock when she found out from some of my male colleagues that I really don’t watch porn. Pretty hard to believe but … oh well…

Then words got around that I am actually… gay, which is also not true… double oh well…

But I received a forwarded video clip and the message in that mail was… “just watch till the end…”. I opened the clip and it was indeed a porn clip. Rather holistic I must say as the guy kept going…”oh god oh god”. The girl totally agreed that the guy was holistic as she kept going…”oh yeah… oh yeah”.

Not long after that, the guy probably reached the peak of his holiness when he pulled out his dick and starting shouting… “oh godddddddd….arghhhhh…”. The camera was really focusing on this ‘tool’ when he reached his peak and naturally, the up and down motion of his hand
resulted in a few shots of white lotion

Then… all of a sudden… the camera focus was shifted to the ground… moved all over the place and I could hear the cameraman said…

“Oh fuck… fucking hell… get a tissue!!!... get me a tissue quick”

What do you think happened?

59 comments:

kyh said...

chup ah! wheeee

l y n n w e i said...

wah.....gross!!

Jason Phoon said...

this post reminds me of the worst thing ever on the internet, google:

2 girls 1 cup

it's the worst thing ever, I challenge you to watch 10 seconds of it. Just 10 seconds.

I could barely last 8 seconds :S

kyh said...

Wait... I thought yesterday is Friday! KKKK! *blur*

wah such a good boy! rare leh got a man who doesn't watch porn! :P

the cameraman shot his load of white lotion? LOL!

Little Raymond said...

Thanks Jason, I came across not only 2 girls 1 cup, but 2 girls 1 finger as well, and trust me, they're all pretty shitty.

angel said...

Lotion kena the cameraman?

Wah... now I'm wondering abt the 2 gurls and 1 thing... O.o

Anonymous said...

hi Zewt,

this is on something different as you know what I mean...yes, the urine test is entirely negative, which is good for you. Nonetheless, still worth getting a repeat of the test in a year's time. If negative then, you can be more at ease.

Mummy

flaminglambo said...

Don't tell me the girl's a squirter.

Yeah, I don't watch porn now too. I practice it...

littlepolaris said...

Haih, dat's why never watch america porn. Watch chinese porn! It's more like comedy than a porn. We all laughed more than feeling sexcited.

myop101 said...

the "white lotion" hit the cameraman's mouth?

Sharon said...

hmm i think its quite predictable, its either the "stuff" flew and got to the cameraman
OR
the cameraman is gay and he came as well? :P

Anonymous said...

the cameraman got shot! hahahaha...

PurpLe~MuShRooM said...

Eh.. what porn is that? Fwd to me la!

missironic said...

cameraman got nose bleed? lolz...

Supergirlfriend said...

HAHA..it's so funny the way you described it! "Oh god oh god? And oh yeah oh yeah?" Classic lines of their love for God. :p

aSstHa said...

hmmm... i remember hearing this sumwer b4... erm... lotion shot to eyes/mouth me thinks... *ROFL*

eppy weekend zewty...

Russ said...

Its the one with the girl in the pink top right (before she stripped) and the guy is bald with a few tatoos right? And the cameraman gets a load full of swimmers in his eye right?

Anyway I dont watch porn, so probably just a good guess.. :P

Ivan said...

Apa lagi? The cameraman watched too syok already...hehe and then decided to contribute some white lotion for everyone ;p

Zawi said...

zewt,
I think russ saw the clip. He was so specific. Hey those camera men are so used to seeing them live. Nothing can stir him up anymore unless he chose to get himself involved the act as well, then only will he be able to contribute.

Huei said...

hahahahahhah

he shot into his own mouth hahahahh

i thought gays watch porn too? don't they?

Freethinker said...

Hit the bull's eye....muahhaa

F.O.N @ frostee said...

Haha! I think the cameraman reached his peak of holiness too! Hahaha!

Doreen said...

Eeeewwwwww...why did he pee in the middle of shooting porn? Hahahaha

The Pisces Man said...

Trust me, there are so many men out there who never or no longer watch porn and there's nothing wrong with their sexual drive/orientation. Am I correct, Zewt?

As for me, I just find porn a waste of time - even the slightest 'pornish' act, I find it too gross and puke-inducing.

gina said...

You have a thing against gays one hor? I like gay people! They are really nice people!

sharlydia said...

hahaha! this is a good one for friday, dude!

Mcmercedez said...

hahaha.. that's a good one.. hahah... i think something must have happened like someone (e.g wife or girlfriend) came back all of the sudden and even worse.. maybe he shit.. hahahah...

alan zed said...

he jizzed all over the camera. i dont know man. heh.

bro, can share tip how to stop watching porn. me still watch la.

sad.

:(

zewt said...

kyh - no points chupping here though :P the cameraman kena a shot of white lotion la...

l y n n w e i - ... becos?

Jason Phoon - hmmmm... i can only see the reaction... i cant see the real thing. can someone pls tell me what is this 2 girls 1 cup?

Little Raymond - ok, now i am really curious.

angel - yeah, me too. oh, u guessed correctly.

anon aka Mummy - thanks for the info. yeah, i am thankful for that. will keep a healthy diet from now on too.

zewt said...

flaminglambo - good for u... jealous...

littlepolaris - hahaha... like how?

myop101 - face... face...

Sharon - now, i must say you're very imaginative haha!

anon @ 9.11a - a few shots in fact haha.

purple mushroom - wahhh... u sure?

missironic - hahaha... no.

lovie said...

=D
What happened actually? You should share the details with us. =D

zewt said...

Supergirlfriend - hahaha... have you been so in love for god before?

aSstHa - eyes... haha.

Russ - now... that is real bad acting... haha.

Ivan - hahahaha.... nope, read some other comments.

Zawi - he is such a bad actor isnt he?

Huei - gay got gay porn... yucks!!!!

freethinker - on the face of the cameraman...

zewt said...

F.O.N @ frostee - hahahaha.... nope nope... but very imaginative.

Doreen - wow... this is a new answer...

The Pisces Man - i just prefer the real thing hehe.

gina - yeah, think they are nice... as long as they are not 'nice' to me then it's fine.

sharlydia - always will.

Mcmercedez - hahahaha... shit! tissue for wat then?

alan zed - try the real thing... haha.

lovie - the holy guy shot his load to the cameraman's face! lol!

kyliemc said...

muahha...me dunno wat happened 2 d cameraman..

but i dun watch porn unless being forced 2 :P as in i dunno tht's a porn movie..haha...coz my fren watched it when we were 13 n she puked after tht..she told me thus i didnt watch porn movies til i was 21yrs old...

lol...my ex-hostel roomie was kinda surprised after she knew tht me hadnt watch porn movie..thus she told me tht we were going 2 watch movies on d lappie...anyway,i fell asleep after 5mins...oops,big mistake coz i was teased non stop after tht...

i wonder how guys could withstand staring at d screen 4 such a long time :P hmm....

anthraxxxx said...

Women's porn is called "romance".

missironic said...

anthraxxxx: wat? wif lovey dovey storyline? goreng all into one? lolz..

missironic said...

Zewt: ceh..i got wrong answer..i tot he also into 'the moment'..mana tau, kena the other way round pulak! kesian cameraman..bcome cameraman also quite pitiful, hor! lolz...

aSstHa said...

aiyak... not eyes/mouth ka? ceh...

*goes to corner n sulks*

day-dreamer said...

*dunno how to respond*

Anyway, happy weekend!

Calvin's Wife said...

erm... holyman shot his holy water at the camera man's face?? wukakakakkaka...

lovie said...

The holy man so "expert"? =D

j or ji said...

i was checking and reading 2,3 times...mana zewt letak link to the clips?...tak jumpa pun!!

so,email me that clips la.

i guess the cameraman also naik syok and masturbate la..coming all together with the porn star.

i love ron jeremy the porn legend.

B@byLor said...

Yuck! You didn't give warning that this entry is not for under 18!!!!!

SuLee said...

wohh.......

rational thinker said...

pls don't goggle the freaking video that somoen suggested above.

sadly, my curiousity beats me to it, and i survived 5 secs of it...now i feel like throwing up . sick bastard!

Mandeep Gill said...

Zewt, didn't you watch 2 Girls 1 cup? its on my blog. Everyone literally shook me silly for letting them watch it. Its famous for its REACTION VIDEOS, which was what got me all curious and yea.

its traumatizing.
4 people blame me for their loss of appetite for at least 2 days.

eye squirts are N.O.T.H.I.N.G compared to 2Girls1cup.
:D
*gives creepy laugh*

merdurian.com said...

stopped watching porn since the longest time? yao mou oh?? LOL

SuLee said...

oh god, should rate your post 18SX !!

unboring way to call breast - tatas!

zewt said...

kyliemc - forced? woooaah... well, that's a new one. how do u know guys cant stare at the screen for so long? what do u think should happen?

anthraxxxx - hahaha... sure boh?

missironic - lesson to learn... wanna watch... dont get too near la.

aSstHa - should be face la... else how to call for tissue? haha

day-dreamer - hahaha... happy weekend to u too!

calvin's wife - holy water... kakakakaka.... yeah.

lovie - sharp shooter eh?

zewt said...

j or ji - have to say no idea who ron jeremy is man... lol!

B@bylor - oppsss....

SuLee - called it tatas? how boring...

rational thinker - i didnt watch it... i only read the way ppl described it... that is enough to make me puke.

Mandeep Gill - hmmm... i didnt watch it yet, only read the synopsis. maybe i should explore that in your blog tonight. good for diet purposes eh?

merdurian.com - hello and welcome to AZAIG. sigh... so hard to believe eh? i hope one of my mate will testify it here. he knows about that part of me.

CS said...

i din watch for long time also... if did also.. using fast forward... as feel like nothing to see also... now married liao.. lagi tak payah tengok la....

some more my wife dun like it also.. sien at first.. now get used to it... seems like no longer adicted.... haha...

Zewt, thanks for visiting my blog.... hope to link u up soon...

SuLee said...

and breast, boobs, tits are un-boring? *faint*

seokthong said...

Actually i like watching porn. Even my hubby says that i'm crazy(my hubby doesn't watch porn)..I used to watch a lot long time before but nowadays getting lesser as it's getting boring..Always the same old thing. And of course i don't watch homosexual porns or those with eating shit and drinking pees..

The other day i saw one video with a man with really big 'balls' and when he cum, i think the sperm can fill the 0.5l bottle..Really a lot :)

missironic said...

hmm..another lesson to learn..dun shoot porn shows la...lolz..:P

tulipspeaks said...

the cameraman got shot eh? hehehehe..


ammu.

zewt said...

cs - hi... welcome. haha... never addicted to it. heard porn can spoil one's sex drive... so better not push it. hope to see ya again.

sulee - ok la... then tatas... haha.

seokthong - wow... this is a new one hahaha... 0.5l?????? can drown a girl man!

missironic - just dont stand so near la... haha.

tulipspeaks - bingo...

seokthong said...

Yes, if you're interested i can send you the link :)

zewt said...

seok thong - errr.... no thanks :)

sex shop fleshlight said...

To my mind everyone may read it.