Tuesday 29 May 2007

What they’ll do to say I do

“Whenever I see those slide shows, I will cry, because I know I will never have be able to experience all that”
“Why? Which part?”
“The church ceremony, cause he is not a believer”

That was my friend Jenny telling me about her repeating experiences in her friends’ wedding dinner. She is one of those typical Christian girls who always wanted to date a Christian but for some twist of fate, or for her wallet’s sake…
ended up with a non-Christian. While Jenny isn’t exactly a very Godly person, she is no different from any other Christian girls, or any girls for that matter… Jenny wants a church wedding.

You see, when Jenny told me about her predicament, her concern wasn’t about the salvation of her bf, her concern wasn’t the holy solemnisation of the marriage, not even the exchanging of vows… her concern is… “the church ceremony”.

Now, having a church wedding here isn’t exactly about having God as the witness of the marriage. No, not at all, trust me…to some people, these are secondary. The whole idea about having a church wedding is to be able walk down the aisle in that beautiful wedding gown with a veil covering the face, it’s about saying “I do”, it’s about exchanging rings, it’s about “You may kiss the bride”, it’s about walking out from the church after the “I do” part with people clapping and smiling at you, it’s about feeling beautiful… most importantly, it’s about that romantic feeling engulfing your whole being. If you’re a girl, you will know what I mean, right?

So what’s the remedy? You can’t force a religion into a person and… if you happen to be a
member of a MNC (Multi-National “Churchnisation”), the pastor might crucify you if you even dare to date a non-Christian, what more if you intend to marry one. So what do you do?

Well, Jenny is going to get married, and Jenny is going to have a church wedding. She is going to walk down the aisle in that beautiful wedding gown, they are going to exchange rings, there will be people applauding them when they walk out of the church and there will be a slide shows capturing those moments in her wedding dinner. But no… her fiancé is not a Christian.

How? … … … Well…

Jenny’s bf is going to “declare” his believe in God… all of Jenny’s friends are going to “believe” that he is now a Christian… one of Jenny’s friend who is a cell group leader is going to “nurture” the “new” Christian. All these are done so that the church will “believe” that they are going to marry a “Christian” couple. You get the flow?

To me… I find all the efforts and planning absolutely amazing. I mean… the level of friendship is just so deep and touching. Maybe Jenny’s fiancé is now a Christian, I am not sure, but I find the whole thing absolutely amazing. Don’t you think so?

Put Jenny’s story aside, I believe many girls here will want a walk down the aisle in “that” wedding gown, do you? Can't blame you… walking down the aisle in a white wedding gown, accompanied by the most romantic song ever as compared to being in a deep red “cheongsam” or some red outfit that you don’t even know how to pronounce accompanied by noise music played by instruments that are extra-terrestrial to you… which one do you think people nowadays will choose?

Jules have got a few girl-friends and they are not Christians. But Jules said she will not be surprise if they will all do a “Jenny”, all for the sake of having a church ceremony. She particularly pointed out one friend, one whom I’ve met and I wouldn’t be surprise if another “Jenny” act will come out from this friend.

So will you get all your friends and do a “Jenny”? Because there are people out there who will do anything just to that few minutes of romantic shower… no matter what. They’ll do all that, just to say I do in a church. Will you?


P/S: The above is just a story, any similarities is purely a co-incident.

55 comments:

Melyong said...

the intention is definately wrong. hopefully they will somehow think an extra mile that going to Sunday service together is romantic as well.

God, help these people to your light. And at the same time, help us not be like them.

btw, like the new look!!!

aamyy said...

I think that's a personal choice and commitment one has to make and it's between that individual and God.

Even if it was just a 'show', one's christian journey will flourish if God calls him/her to Himself. Those who called themselves Christians, if don't have an authentic christian walk is pretense and is no different from those who say yes for ulterior motives.

So, let's not judge or decide for them, but leave it to God for He sees our heart through n through :)

TingTitLei said...

wow his love for her must be really great.. but i think changing your religion for your lover is kinda.. weird. its either he really believes in Him, which is good I guess, or hes just doing it to please her. if its the latter, i think thats kinda fucked haha

and i hate the "Christian bf only" mentality -_-

Raksha said...

It's a girl thing, dude.

Church wedding = romantic = dream since a kiddo

I distinctively recall drawing stick figures in the fluffiest bridal gowns ever when I was oh, 6 years old. It represents something romantic and a once-in-a-lifetime moment for them. *shrugs*

I'm more of a free-thinker, and personally, I wouldn't bother with one unless my future husband wants it. I think I prefer a garden or beach wedding. Something less...ostentatious?

But trust me, if I HAVE to have it in a church, one thing's for sure - I'm not inflicting any dresses on my bridesmaid that will make them look semi-pregnant.

[Pause]

Yes, I'm speaking from personal experience here. Gah.

5xmom.com said...

LOL, I am reading this at 3.20 am but just have to say something. I am a Catholic and if, if there is an if, my atm embraced Christ one day, get baptised and confirmed as a Catholic, we actually have to do a church wedding. Wowser, I wonder how old I will be then? LOL. But nope, no matter what faith, that ceremony in front of God or other faiths' gods or ancestors are not to be messed with. You either believe or stay away from it. The repercussions when things go wrong is great, isn't it?

kyh said...

It's wrong to do this just for the sake of 'romance'. Like 5xmom said, if you do not believe in it, then you better stay out. It's not a thing to be messed with or fooled around. You can mess with anything, but not something divine or holy. I absolutely oppose these kind of actions.

BTW, converting to your spouse's religion just because your marriage requires you to do so and not because you believe in it, IMO, is very stupid and absurd. This is like belittling the real meaning of devotion towards a divine being. It's the same like those so-called 'philantropists' who do charities and donate large sums of money not bcos they're really that caring towards the poor and needy, but mainly due to that they do this for fame and recognition. The real intention is totally wrong. Get the drift?

Just bcos of that transient moment of a highly materialised romance, we are going astray from the real meaning of having a religious wedding.

JamyTan said...

U know it is very romantic feeling walking down the aile but it is dam difficult task for me, I can tell u that. My girlfriend lend me her wedding grown (she is very particular about the whole wedding ceremony stuff, very European, 1/2 Germans lah). The gown costs US$5k. Gots lot of heavy crystals, beads lah etc. It was very very heavy and there is a long tail abt I think 10ft or I forget also. It was so long , I tell u just as well I did not trip over. It is very grand but it is really susah to walk !

I used to fancy / dreaming abt the Venice gondola (from movies etc.) And guess what, it was hot and humid the day when I was gondolaing in Venice, tell u it is not different from riding on Sampan in Sarawak River.

TH said...

The 'church wedding' has been nurtured in us since young from movies, barbie dolls, yadda yadda. Can't blame the girls right?

Compared to the Chinese traditional wedding, majority of us who has grown up in the 70-90's would prefer something more modern which we could relate to i.e. a church wedding.

However, I wouldn't agree with the conversion if it's not about faith.

Weig said...

I'd say, if it's the ceremony she wants, give it to her. It's only walking down aisle and saying a few promises anyway. It's attention seeking girl wanting to be seen in her white dress and given that standing ovation once she's finished her performance. Religion has nothing to do with it.

**************Jz***************** said...

hey wedding nowdays is as good as putting up a 'show' but the main cast is of course urself and ur partner and then your immediate family members........argh.......

so the 'i do' part for a few minutes of romance.......is of course a must.......but hey i think the 'kwa' is cool toooooooooo ............prolly you shud get one for ur fianceeeeeee


=) wedding..............wedding wedding......................

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

what is all dis rubbish ar..i think its ridiculous to do "believe" for the sake of "believing" and i dont buy that kinda crap..if u love some1 so much..despite all those daily dreams u get walking down the aisle..at the end of the day its who u will be with for the rest of ur life. if she wants an aisle so badly..i probably rent a hall and put out the benches..hahaha

Anonymous said...

Oh, in Japan, 90% of the couples would just get the whole "christian-styled wedding", or even get a fake angmoh priest for their ceremony. Check this out: Wedding in Japan

Anonymous said...

Call me an unromantic jerk if you will but I do not see a rationale in all these
If you want a church wedding then just go for one, I don't believe in if you are not a christian then you can't have a church wedding, that to me is bull
Be it whatever wedding that you have, the main thing is what the two person shares, it has nothing to do with the world, but just a show, literally

Jonzz said...

That 'You can only marry in church if you're a Christian' is a rule set by the respective churches for their own reasons. Anyway, every religion would have their rules and practices which appear ridiculous and loathsome to those who do not practice the same.

So it's not surprising that people would resort to pretences to be able to stage a church wedding. But if you were a staunch believer, it makes a world of difference to have the full real deal.

Azlan Zed said...

if make in a large hall, can oso walk the aisle what... :)

Huei said...

hmm..it would be nice to walk down that aisle beautifully dressed in that gown..but..i think it'll be the ET thingy i'll end up in >.< hehe

narrowband said...

I think they simply watched too many movies. It's not practical and it's not real. The feeling of experiencing something "truly real" isn't there, I cannot believe they'll enjoy the ceremony altogether. How can you enjoy something that's fake? I can't. And it's torturous.

Anonymous said...

i think the church wedding has been romanticized as the 'dream/romantic' wedding. some of my girlfriends want a church wedding because it's their beliefs. but their husbands are believers too, so no issue. for those who are not, they do a civil ceremony that's pretty fun too. for me, it's not an ideal i want or aspire....so i've no illusions about any weddings for that matter.

Jorji said...

Jules,jane,Jenny and joanne (CIA case) are they related? siblings?

What the hell's wrong with their family!!?

A psycho killer,
Murder victim,
Inter religion romantic and
a lesbian!

gosh!

Elizebeth D.L. said...

I am a christian too, I too, did not have the church wedding. Every time I see the TV drama about church wedding (e.g. Sex and the City, hahaa), I will feel a bit ngiao ngiao in my heart, for not having a church wedding!!

Church wedding is really every girl's dream:-)

gRaCe said...

as most girls here hav said it, a church wedding is 'almost' a girl's dream wedding come true. Will i have a church wedding?? if my other half is a catholic/christian.. yea, i probly will. but will i convert?? i will NOT just becuz my other half is one. i will only convert if i Believe.

but i do have a replacement for a church wedding in my mind. a garden wedding or a cruise wedding. Just as perfect, nice and romantic. Heheh..

*day dreaming ady..when i have not even find my other half. Kekek..*

Winn said...

my bro and his wife did a temple wedding. and they do have the white wed gown, exchange of rings, vows, flower gals, catch bouquet etc.....oh i think they freed some birds as part of the ceremony too:P

it's not as glamorous as church wed for sure..

i agree wif u..u cant force a religion into someone.

i believe all religions are good. and i thnk no one religion is better than another..God do not judge your religion. He will only weigh the you within you.

baggie said...

Hmmm, too much of Hollywood's weddings influence. IT is not appropriate for you to simply accept a religion just because you want to marry in the church... what kind of act is that?

Who says you kenot have a romantic reception if you're not a Christian. You gotta be creative to bring in your own romanticness.

I'm a Buddhist, apart from the tea ceremony, you can have your weddings in a perfect romantic place. You also get to walk down the aisle in the restaurant wert, only it's not a church. Heheheh

Be creative, you could have your weddings in the garden area, by the sea, fly off to MAldives and get married there, so many things more. Like Grace.

rinnah said...

I was pretty aghast when I read this blog entry.

I'm not against people wanting to have the whole church wedding thingy (I myself want that) but for Jenny and her fiance to go thru a whole rigmarole of letting everyone "believe" that her fiance has really truly converted to Christianity just for the sake of a wedding ceremony is not right.

Like what 5xmom said, these things are not to be taken lightly and messed around with. And I agree with kyh - the intention here is totally wrong.

I will be happy for them if along the way, her fiance meets God and is truly converted, but until then, I am firmly against it.

Cherry Popcorn said...

Haha.. so true so true. I'm not a christian and will never be a christian but I think the whole thing about walking down the aisle and everything is just so special and yeah, romantic. Must be the influence of the TV. Do you know how many shows have this so called church wedding. and it's always at the ending, to portray happy ending! Happy ever after!

Humbug!!!

Nice layout. The old wan was brigter but this is ok! =) How you ask Kenny Mah? I also want! =P

Alliedmartster said...

Zewt, perhaps that is why there are so many wedding 'chapels' in Vegas..
TIme to start one in KL then.....for ATheist....just so that they can 'Walk down the aisle'....

Any investors?

Oh. it will be in trendy Hartamas area......what say you?

J.T. said...

Growing up in a Eurasian family (and being Catholic at that), a church wedding was always a given. No way out of that one, lest we get the elders upset. The only thing is, I was prepared for the eventuality of any other ceremony that might follow if I married another race in Malaysia.
When my husband and I were planning to get married, someone asked me if he was going to become Catholic (to marry in church and to have a united religion at home). I told that person:
1. The Catholic church (I know of)does not force people to convert.
2. I do not believe in forcing someone to embrace a new faith simply for face value. What is the point when that person does not embrace that faith in his/her heart?
3. Having one faith at home never always spells harmony. It is the commitment of a couple to stay together. Religion helps but not always the factor.
If some are itching to 'walk down the aisle', then arrange for it. I don't think it is impossible. There is always a way to get one's dream wedding. You just have to ask. :)
Note to alliedmarster: if I had enough 'vitamin M', I would consider going into the wedding chapel business. After all, I hope to fulfil my dream of being a wedding gown designer and/or planner - one stop shop!

Anonymous said...

Like what other said, i think they watch too much hollywood movies.

For me, i don't see any romantic-ness marrying in the church when i saw it in tv. Maybe the real thing is different..I don't know too.

I'll not change my religion for the sake on marrying in the church also. This's like a bit crazy.

Like what calvin's wife has said, a person has to be creative to feel romantic. There are still mayn other options, not only church wedding.

ManaL said...

Selamat...pengantin baaaarooo....


I'm gonna for opt for less frills but full of elegance kinda wedding. The one that i dont need to walk that long on those killer high heels so definitely not so much into church kinda wedding. However, i'd love to see my frens do that. I have missed two last year due to the clash of date with my 1st bro's wedding and other issues.

But then, ARE YOU up for it? i think u shud do the church one given the raining and humidity situations in msia that makes me less enthusiastic on a garden wedding.

At the end of the day, it's what the bride n groom feels. I dunno why but the parents normally decide on the venue and so on.

Anonymous said...

Haha...wedding is just one day, marriage is for the rest of their lives (hopefully)...so which is more important? =)

As a girl, of course I wanted a perfect wedding as well, but one day, my mum said something to me that I still remember and it really put things into perspective: "Are you more ready to be a bride or a wife?" and it made me realize that having that 100% perfect wedding is not as important as our lives together after the wedding day...

Wickedsa said...

maybe im too early to talk about this but...it doesn't matter how the wedding goes.
as long as there's love, it's perfect wedding.
if it's just a business trade kinda of wedding, it wouldn'n be anything big even if the bride could wear 'that' gown and walking down the aisle.
well, wearing 'that' gown and having a wedding ceremony under the moonlight at the beach side also romantic wert *wink*

JamyTan said...

Wow, what a wise statement :""Are you more ready to be a bride or a wife?""

I was very fascinated by Lady Diana wedding in the early 80's. White wedding... grand, romantic and beautiful !

Her funeral on the TV many yrs later made u wonder what is more important, wedding or marriage life ?

zewt said...

bubbly soda - actually, i am not against her doing it, i mean... ppl will do anything for themselves. what i cant understand is those around her play along. well, i may be wrong.

aamyy - yeah, i know, i cant be so judgemental. but i really cant help it. anyway, u know what i mean.

TTL - well, maybe he isnt for real? hey... when a girl said "only christian bf"... dont fret... just concentrate on stuffing your wallet bigger... know what i mean?

raksha - hey! yeah, i know. it's certainly a girl thing. i know how a girl feels. but i think the whole saga is a slap in those big churches' face. hmmm.... i guess you've looked semi-preggy before eh? hahahaha.... maybe you're too pretty and the bride felt threatened! haha!

5xmom - yeah, i totally agree with you. shouldnt have let that desire to have a romantic dinner and stage up the biggest act of all. academy award winner la... anyway, i dunno what's the update from there now.

kyh - yeah, what matters is the heart. but then again... dont think she cares much about the heart... like i said, it's not about God... it's about her getting what she wants.

kayatan - wow... that seems tough. but but but... i am sure it was worth it right? :)... well, everything always look nice when it happens to others, when u have it... it doesnt matter much anymore eh?

zewt said...

Twisted Heels - precisely... everyone wants a church wedding ya? and yeah... it's not about the conversion, it never is. it's about the girl getting what she wants.

cirnelle - religion really has nothing to do with it. it's about that standing ovation. so if she gets it... she'll be happy.

jaezrel - so next time when u get married, make sure u walk down the aisle with the 'kwa' ya... hehe... my fiance wont wear it i think.

constat craver joe - sigh... no one said anything about believing... it's all about just saying i do and having that wedding. hmmm... a hall is not a church ler...

mich - hey... how do u do the link thingy? .... and yeah... that's exactly my point... everyone also want a church wedding... all forget he true meaning behind it.

zeroimpact - hahahaha... one day your girl demands for a church wedding then u know that being an unromantic jerk can be tough hehe... negative, to some... like jenny... it's about that 1 hour of fame. trust me on that.

zewt said...

Jonzz - well... i think the 'you can only marry in church if you're a C' rule came back and haunt those churches now. actually... what i am trying to say is that those strict churches control their ppl so much... what they dunno is that their sheeps are really running wild.

alan zed - hahaha... you've got a point!

huei - what do u mean by ET ah?

narrowband - well... some ppl are willing to do a lot for love. works both ways... guys and girls... i am sure u will soon learn about that part in life :)

imp - good for you then. glad you have a strong beliefs and doesnt do something superficial just to get 1 hour of romantic fame.

jorji - hahaha... i just like to use the J names... ke ke ke ...

zewt said...

elizabeth DL - so do you still wanna live that dream?

grace - well... for those who wanna have garden wedding... dont u think it's also somewhat a christian wedding? i should re-word my post... it's about a church wedding, but rather a christian wedding.

winn - :)... i am sure your bro's must be darn nice too. yeah, i just think ppl are a bit disillusioned when it comes to church wedding.

calvin's wife - well... to each its own... some ppl are just disillusioned. but cant blame them la... all external influence. and if you ask me... i will want a church wedding too! yeah... maldives would definitely be very very romantic... and expensive!

rinnah - haha... "aghast"! what i really cant believe are her friends who are willing to play along. i think those strict churches are really unaware of all those things ppl do so get away rules. typical isnt it... when ppl are so strict.

princess shin - ahh... so you're another church wedding dreamer huh... i think i should really start one such service hahaha... one thing... dont say too quick about not being a christian. hmm... i think kenny is going to be a busy man.

zewt said...

alliedmaster - hahahaha... hartamas not that high class yet la... damansara heights la... where else... hahaha...

JT - yeah, you've got a point, i am sure there's always a way to arrange for a walk down the aisle. but i think most ppl want more, more than just walking down the aisle. it's the whole church feel. by the way, wedding planning in msia is a big big big business... trust me on that. i just had a chat with allan from just heavenly... incredible.

seok thong - true... the influence of western culture. but i do admit... it's rather romantic. oh yeah... holiday can be romantic too. but i guess church is just different.

manal - terima kasih terima kasih... hehe... i am definitely going to do a church thing. actually... it's gonna be in a wedding with a pastor and all. but not fake ok... cos me and jules are both believer :P

sooyin - wow... so profound. think i need to ask jules that... see how she answer... hahaha... she will sure be shock :P...

baby sa - hehe... but goes the ceremony... most ppl want the pastor and kiss the bride feel... which is not exactly a traditional chinese thing.

kayatan - yeah... sooyin's statement was really incredible. made me think too... well... i think wedding and marriage are both important elements in life.

Observer said...

??? Jenny isn't real ?

Missy Allets said...

Calvin's wife ;) I sure liked that name..

Anyway, I agree, a little creativity goes a long way. Put on that thinking cap and you'll have a romantic wedding in a bakery amidst a winery :)

Church.. that's a little passé, don't you think?

SuLee said...

i really want a church wedding too, march down the aisle, sighh wonder if people really get baptize just for a church wedding?

or i might be the first one ? haha kidding

nyonyapenang said...

wuah...lidat also can ar?

and i like alliedmartster business proposal. :)

zewt said...

freethinker - well... who knows?

missy allets - hello there, welcome to AZAIG. well, to each its own, some just want to have that i-do and kiss the bride feeling. you'll never know. thanks for dropping by and hope to see ya around.

SuLee - do it... i wont tell anyone... just between u and me ok? :P

nyonyapenang - hahaha... definitely a market that we should look into ya?

Lobak said...

Why go through the trouble? Might as well just have a garden wedding, get someone to dress up as the pastor, and you get to play dress up too?? Not that hard for someone to say "Dearly beloved, we're gathered here today..yada yada...you may kiss the bride" right?? b'sides, I personally think that garden weddings are much more romantic.

Then again, garden weddings in Malaysia - not workable. Now I see why the church... sighs...

Jonzz said...

I think it's too simplistic to just label it as the church trying to control its congregation.

It's a matter of perspective. It seems that more often than not, people want a church wedding because of the perceived grandness, glamour and fame associated with it. If the church does not give them what they want, the church is immediately labelled old fashioned or narrow minded. The church is not a just a building for conducting weddings. It represents something.

The church on the other hand, does not want to encourage weddings between believers and non believers probably for simple biblical reasons of protecting the faith of its members. But this does not prevent the member from getting married outside.

The world has rules. The church has rules. I think people should not be quick to criticize something just because we cannot get what we want or it does not fit in with our line of thinking.

:: Nicole.F :: said...

for this post, i can relate it to myself.. all this while i wanted to get married in a church BUT in order to do that i've to be a christian and to go for classes.. walking down the aisle, saying i do and exchanging rings are the things what most girls would want..

come to think of it, having a garden wedding also we can do that.. at least i get to write my own vows.. hehe.. i can still wear my wedding dress and walk down the 'aisle' to exchange vows and kiss.. hehe.. after that, it'd be buffet time!! :)

Anonymous said...

Funny...I thought it was ok to have a church wedding even tho the other half isn't a christian/catholic. But it's not funny to "make" the other half embrace a religion unfamiliar to them, just to have this "wedding".

anyway...just my opinion..since my mother pleased her in-laws by becoming a Christian..but now..she's given it up. What does that make her?

zewt said...

BlueApple - i realised i have gotten the message wrong. instead of a church wedding, i should say... a christian wedding. i mean... a lot of ppl would want a christian wedding cos it's the most romantic kind... the dear beloved bla bla till kiss the bride.

Jonzz - refer to my reply to blue apple above. i wasnt really talking about church wedding but rather a christian wedding. sorry, i think my message was a bit blur huh :) ... anyway, i know church has rules... but i think some church has gone over-board. it's not about just not getting what he/she wants... it has reached to a stage where the church runs everything. i think it's a chicken and egg argument.

nicole - means christian style wedding la... hahaha... doesnt really matter if you're a buddhist right? everyone just want a christian wedding.

mott - i guess your mom is now... not a christian? :P ... this is what happened when u force religion into someone.

Bee Ean said...

I have never dreamt of having a church wedding, but sometimes thing just get to you. I had already have a wedding in the town hall, a traditional chinese wedding, and now going to have a church wedding with the same guy again in France, how romantic is that? As I said I was really to give up this church wedding, but my husband said it will disappoint her family and it's in the culture to do this. Ok now we do this for his family and tradition sake. At the beginning the priest we contacted said I need to be baptised. But my husband and family insisted that I shouldn't change my religion if I don't believe in it. So, we thought it's not possible, but people told me that the Catholic church here does not force people to convert, so we managed to find a super open minded priest who is willing to perform the ceremony and who invited me to talk about my religion and the Catholic in Malaysia. I told him hey Catholic in Malaysia is not allowed to drink alcohol, why ah so different one? In France all the priests drink. And my Chinese friend got married in a church in China, just have to pay that's it. So I think sooner or later the Malaysian church is going to accept mix marriage couple.

Doreen said...

Ahhhh...the church wedding....too much movies these days la and I really don't know what so special about walking down the aisle in the church (unless of course you're a true devoted christian). Everyone wants the same thing, and does the same thing, boring, no?

zewt said...

Bee Ean Tee - well, it seems to be a business nowadays eh? the problem in malaysia is that some churches have grown so big, it gets to their head... they wanna run ppls' lives... so in the end... ppl just leave the church or stage up an act to get things done. you have a very understanding husband and his church is .... darn cool! hah!

doreen - hi there and welcome. well, this is one thing that not many will find boring. in fact, it's sorta like a must have for a few... i guess it's just over-rated. of cos, if you're a believer, then it's different.

Z said...

heya. first-timer here =)

i was rather intrigued by this entry. i've always been amused by girls choosing to be wed in a typical church wedding ceremony although they/the future-spouse are not 'believers' - not out of spirituality, but "just because".

even tho i'm a muslim, i understand the clashing-of-culture predicament. i dont really agree with the 'bersanding' adat of malay weddings either. i find it too 'showy' and tedious, with all the preparations etc. but i dont plan to substitute it with another culture's just for the fun of it.

getting married is about you and the spouse-to-be, after all, right? so just the exchangign of vows and the cert will be enough to make it official that a couple is married.

but that's just MHO. =)

zewt said...

Zaty - hi there! welcome to AZAIG. well, what you said it's true. but it's also the ironny of it... the fact that it's about you and your spouse. if either one of you is adamant that a church wedding, or whichever tradition is essential... then you will just do whatever it takes to make it happen... dont u think so? thanks for dropping by and hope to see ya again.

Z said...

heya. yeah i guess so. still, i find it quite amusing when people are persistent in certain religious things such as marrying in worshipping places etc yet do not hold any belief in the religion itself.

kind of.. sad, i guess, to just pretend to believe in something when you know you're not.

ah well. as long as in the end both are happy, whatever i guess =)

missX said...

LOL... This post is funny, made me laugh while reading it. Zewt, you understand girls quite well, LOL...

zewt said...

Zaty - hmmm.... didnt notice there is an unreplied comment here... sometimes, ppl can ignore their beliefs... dont u think? just look at our country.

Just Jasmine - hehe... i do eh? :)