Friday 25 January 2008

You pee, I pee, he pees, she pees

I celebrated the millennium here in London and I will always remember how it went. It’s a very fond memory not just because I spent it in a foreign land and watching fantastic fireworks in the chilly winter night; but also because of a very peculiar thing.

I remember the evening started with me and my uni-mates all stuck in the tube as there were delays everywhere. Not surprising considering the amount of people heading to central London at that time. Our arrival in central London was greeted with a barrage of people. We don’t know where were heading, we just followed the crowd.

It was after about an hour that some of us began to feel uneasy… we need to take a piss. Now, those who have been to London will know that there are 2 things which are akin to treasure in London. The first is a dustbin, and the other… toilet. Yes, you hardly find these two things in central London. I heard it was a measure to prevent terrorist placing bombs there.

So what do you do when a guy needs to go? Well, a guy will go when a guy needs to go. So a bunch of us made our way to the side of the road, headed to the back lane, behind all the tall buildings and you know what? That part of town turned into some giant toilet with so many people taking a piss! And… there were girls too. Hell, they didn’t really care… just pull down their pants and do what a girl needs to do when a girl needs to go.

That was not it…

As we walk further… and drink water as we walked along, the urge to go came again. But this time, there wasn’t any building we can go too as we were really at the heart of London and really nowhere to go. It was then that a friend of mine spotted a bush not too far away.

And so, we squeezed our way through the crowd and headed to that bush… quite a big bush I would say. It’s one where you can actually duck and walk into it, which was exactly what we did. And guess that… just as I walked in… I was greeted by 3 girls… squatting there… doing their business… and you know what they said to me?

“Hello dear… you gotta wait for your turn…”

55 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, you know what they say... Ladies First! Hahahaha...

P.S. Thanks for the b'day wishes, bro! :D

Huei said...

wait for ur turn for wut huh? ;P hehehehhe

Anonymous said...

Lady can pee in ang moh bushes! Over here how to pee in bushes!!! Got tall & pointed grass & insect some more! Have a nice day!

Supergirlfriend said...

Zewt, looks like I gotta wear diapers when I go to London next time... Haha.. :p

Anonymous said...

ahh, will add that into my list of things to look forward to when i further my law studies there =D

missironic said...

hahahaaha..tats funny..really can let go at anywhere ya...i guess desperate measures..dun really bother much dy..lolz..

Ivan said...

Haha...certainly reminds me of the times I needed to find a toilet in London ;p

I only know of one public toilet around the central and that is at the Leicester Sq. Tube Station.

But these things happens all across the UK...hehe and it's easier to "let it go" since other places would not be as crowded as London ;p

PabloPabla said...

Wuah! I would probably freeze and can't piss when I see the ladies pissing next to me :P

frostee said...

Man that's hilarious! I thought that I only see this in parts of Delhi or Bombay.

Millinieum... Hmmm... I was in Amsterdam for 2 nights before heading up to NYC, and I tell you, you can get 'high' by just hanging out in the jam packed streets around Dam Square. And it was like flippin CNY or Guy Fawkes day or something! BUt it was one great party!! Wooo Hooo!

Anonymous said...

Hahah!

Terra Shield said...

That's a good one. :D

Anonymous said...

Gosh! For a while, I thought u've switched jobs...and are now teaching English - subject-verb agreement!!! When I was there, it cost MORE than 1p to pee, 2 ps in fact; yunno those public toilets with slots on the door and u've to put in the coins before it opens...and u can go in to do ur bizniz. So at that time, people should say, "I'm going to pee-pee!" How much is it now, I wonder?

P.S.: Eyew...I thought only people in Malaysia do that (ref. pix)!!!

Anonymous said...

You're lucky you didn't have to pay for using the toilet...errr....bush....

Helen said...

Hahahhaa that's one memorable millenium. Hey, no plastic bags or bottle meh :-P

Elizebeth D.L. said...

This is even more canggih than in China!!! hahahhaa....

Seaqueen said...

Wow. So free show?? Hahahha!!! What a way to enjoy London eh?

gracieq said...

Hahahahahahahahahahaha...oh wait, what did I want to say again? That's right, it's hahahahahhahahahaha

Anonymous said...

wa....erm..speechless..ahaha...

kyh said...

so that whole backlane was literally filled with the strong stench of piss? o.O

and what if u need to do the big thing? must be disgusting rite?

Anonymous said...

Man i'm shocked such thing happen in England..hahaha

It's hilarious at the same time when she asked you to wait.

Anonymous said...

I wonder how was the look on your face when the "ladies" asked you to wait for your turn ... priceless? Hehe ..

Bee Ean said...

I really hate this. Each time I went to downtown/night clubs, I saw guys peeing, some even towards the car tires. I went to a big outdoor concern, and guys peed every way, girls waited for movable toilets. Don't drink if you know there is no toilet!!

zewt said...

kennymah - you're welcome.... have a blast!

Huei - hehe... certainly not for any other thing...

horny - hahaha... that time winter... no insect aa...

supergirlfriend - not that bad..u just have to find a pub... and walk in...hehe.

tingtitlei - once in a millenium mate...

misironic - yeah.. when a lady gotta go... also have to go la... hahaha...

-Ivan - there are more toilets now... i took a few pic... but have to pay la...

zewt said...

pablopabla - well...that's why she asked u to wait till she finished hahaha...

frostee - i think i dont want to go through that again, would rather spend it quietly at home. sign of old age haha!

lynnx01 - hehehe!

terra shield - indeed it is..

suituapui - i think i saw a few... 50p!!!!!!!

giddy tiger - hahha... for a bush? no way!

Helen - no ler... saw a bush... thought it's better mah...

zewt said...

Elizebeth DL - how would china be?

seaqueen - yup... free pee pee show.

gracieq - hahha... lost of words eh?

lynnwei - well, i waited...just looking at them while waiting.

kyh - dont think i saw any big thing so.... hehe.

pookyma - she asked... so i wait lor...

melbie - i.... waited... and ... look while waiting... haha!

Bee Ean - that's guys for u... hehe.

Acute Critique said...

hahaha~! wait for your turn then. i totally agreed with the 'ladies first'. >.<

Anonymous said...

Saw a guy pee-ing into a bin in the DAY when I was in Sheffield a couple of years back. You can see the pee flowing out from the bin too.

Maybe that's another reason why no bins are seen around central London.

(There's quite many on the South Bank nowadays though)

whoalse said...

Hahaha....speaking of which during the days when I had to travel interstates for swim comp where there's no resting sites along the highway, we guys had to do what you did to allow the gals to use the "proper" male toilets in Petrol Stations.

Brings back memories

p/s: I took those sunset shots on my blog.

Anonymous said...

er...how come i so long here, i never seen such things b4? hahaha

Anonymous said...

50p??? That's over RM3 just to pee once!!! I think I would just bring along a plastic bag! Or perhaps...I can just use a rubber band! ROTFLOL!!!

Anonymous said...

warao..thank goodness I didn't have to experience this when I was in London..errr..cannot do it in shopping malls or mcdonalds meh??

zewt said...

Acute Critique - well... since there is no door, i can do some observation right?

mrbherng - south bank? well... i have yet to see.

whoalse - hahahaha... can the girls accept such toilet?

Alvin Lim - were you there during the millenium? hehe.

suituapui - wahh... if u have to go... u have to go....

laundryamah - night time already ler... at tat time... those shops close at 6.

Purple~MushRooM said...

Hmm.. I am glad in Shanghai, there are many public toilets. And I am really surprise that the public toilets here are really clean and the best part is.. it's FOC. No need to pay at all!! Can you believe China!

Anonymous said...

so you don't wash your hands after peeing?? eeeeyerr

Anonymous said...

Haha...but kinda disturbing and unhygenic...sure you won't find these info in brochures on London. :)

Anonymous said...

millennium.. u mean new year countdown.. ?

may said...

haha, that's funny. I'd hate to pee in the bush like those girls. too prickly for my bum :P

Anonymous said...

my goodness, can't believe in modern london like that. *faints*

mistipurple said...

opps that was me.

Anonymous said...

lol.. ladies first dude. you stay there be the guard. bring extra plastic bags next time dude. one to cover your head, one to pee.

Unknown said...

Use the numbering system lor... :P

Sorry didn't drop by for some time and didn't know you already in London. Cool man! All the best my friend!

Shopaholicfern said...

wow...i can't believe it? girls doing it togehter with guys? guy's quite easy to do it. just open front zip, pull ur willy out and do it..but girls...doing it squatting down will reveal the backside wor...

Anonymous said...

Ewww...someone actually took a pix of someone peeing in a sink??!!

Come to think of, I have not noticed any public toilets here. I did see a pile of crap at the pedestrian underpass once. Too big to be an animal's.. :P

Anonymous said...

haha zewt .. u looked!! "Golden" opportunity for you guys huh? LOL

shopaholicfern - in zewt's case, I don't think it was only the backside that was revealed! Bwahahah

Jun said...

wah lau... taking a piss in the bush also need to line up ah? they muz have just returned from spore *LOL*

rainbow angeles said...

I jz spoke to my friend in London last nite and she asked me when I wanna visit again.. aihhh.. I wish! I wish!

Oh, and I also told her not to come back to M'sia.. she asked me, really that bad ah? I told her, everyone's leaving the country, u better dun come back lah! ;)

TH said...

Lol. I've seen too many always peeing behind the Metro stations. I've also seen too many making out behind the Metro stations.

I'm getting OCD with my alcoholic rub now.

zewt said...

purple mushroom - that i must say... it's pretty surprising...

jasonphoon - wash with what ah?

mar - it's history anyway, and u only read it in AZAIG.

Alvin Lim - yup!

anon @ 11.38am aka mistipurle - oh yeah, i have seen some not very modern things here.

bongkersz - hahahahaha... why would i wanna cover my head? err... which head? hahahaha...

Kenny Ng - haha... you should build one for them.

zewt said...

may - hahahaha... ow you know? you tried before?

shopaholicfern - hahaha... i didnt bend down and look.. cant see backside.

kat - hahaha... too big to be animals! hahahahaha...

melbie - yup... it was the front of the back side... bushes inside a bush.

Jun - hahaha... why suddenly singapore wan ah?

angeles - yeah... if i have a chance,i wont go back too. malaysia is pretty... sigh... speechless.

Twisted Heels - OCD?

Pak Zawi said...

zewt,
Did you take the second photo yourself?

zewt said...

zawi - nah... not that fortunate... haha!

Anonymous said...

bushes inside a bush??? ROTFLMAO!!

zewt said...

melbie - hahahahaha... that's right!

Anonymous said...

LOL!!!!

zewt said...

emelda - classic isnt it?