Friday, 30 January 2009

The Bau-Thai experience

I still have not been able to find out what is the accurate English term to refer such phenomena. If you do, please enlighten me…

Anyway, “bau-thai” refers to the situation where the back of your pants burst open mostly due to your pants having grown too old or your ass grown too big. Under these circumstances, the middle of your ass will be taking on great pressure when you engage a squatting position and suddenly… “piak!”… “bau-thai” can happen.

I remember it was within the 2nd year of my working life when I had one helluva bau-thai experience. Since it was only my 2nd year of working life, I guess the pants were not that old so I can only conclude that my ass has grown too big then. See what damage 1-year of work can do to you… sigh…

My desk was swamped with stuff and so I placed a really huge file on the floor and went on that dangerous squat position. That’s when it happened… “piaaaaaak!”. Oh yeah, it was a very big one. The damage was so big that I felt the chill of the air-condition on ass almost immediately.

In a flash, I ran to the toilet to assess the damage. It was bad… very bad… it was a full “bau-thai”. It stretched from just below the belt-line right to the bottom, where the sewing met the front piece. Like I said, it was a full “bau-thai”.

It was still very early in the morning. So I had no choice but to get home and change into a new pair of pants lest I want to parade my under-wear clad ass for my colleagues to see. But I had a big problem. My car was parked in the opposite building. This is the reason why I remember that this incident happened on my 2nd year of working life.

Anyway; like I said, I had no choice. But before I embark on the journey to my car, I managed to somewhat secured the pants by stapling them together. Thereafter, I subtly sneaked into the lift lobby, took the lift down, walk to the front of the building with my back against the wall. I needed to look for the right timing to dash across the road without having to stop in the middle.

Alas, the chance came and like a flash, I dashed across the road and immediately ran towards the staircase which led to my parking level. By the way, the path covered Starbucks and a mamak store so there was no chance for me to take a breather.

Finally, I reached my car and I let out a deep sigh of relief. A little drained from my brief sprint, I immediately dropped my ass to my seat as soon as I opened the door. That’s then the climax hit me…

Unknown to me, the staples which briefly secured my pants were loosen during my sprint and since I dropped my ass hard on my seat…………………let’s just not go there…

Have you had any bad bau-thai experience before?
Though such scenarios are common to guys, perhaps some girls have their own version of bau-thai too? Or boobs grown too big leading to bau-button situation…?


1 year ago…
The 4 here and the 4 thereChick on Chinese

2 years ago…
How was your weekend?Guess the tail of these tales

40 comments:

Lisalicious said...

what about ripped tyre??

day-dreamer said...

LOL it must have been very embarrassing... =/

JustinKC said...

i have experience once and i gotta say its the most embarrassing moment in my whole life. I was dating a girl that time, we just use this sampan to go over to the other side of the water front. being a gentlement, i should go up first and hold her hand to climb up the high jetty. Guess what, when i spread my leg... my trousers "BRAKKKK" i went SHITTT quietly! haizz.... reli pai seh moment larz

drumsticks said...

hahahahhahaha... this is a ridiculously interesting story.. very funny... hmmmmm i dun hv anything to share wor except for 1 but its not bau thai.. hehe

Acute Critique said...

hahahhaha~ it was so funny.. well, seriously i did not encounter this before. lol.. and i was thinking wat Thai, connect it with Thailand. lol~

dy said...

bau thai ah.. craked pants??

i asked my friend, he said dunno, then laughed and said "the trousers give way to the immense intensity" hahah...

foongpc said...

Haha! Very funny! I have this experience before but that time was very small, so not embarrassed at all, even though not wearing any underwear! LOL!

Crankster said...

Oh dear. I once managed to rip my skirt zip (at the back) when I was 12. Highly embarrassing experience, so I feel for you. These are truly moments you can't forget. :)

rinnah said...

I remember once in the early stages of my working life... the threading of the button on the front of my blouse was loose and the button popped off... and the button was exactly at the bust area... I had to frantically hold the blouse with one hand, walk to KLCC and buy myself a new t-shirt just to get home... hahaha.

little jennifer said...

lol...nvr bau thai lar..skirt all the time ^^

Life for Beginners said...

I can certainly imagine something worse... remember that scene from "There's Something About Mary"... with toilet and the doves outside the window and the... ZSSRRRIIIPPPP!!!! ?

Yeah. Ouchies. :P

Faisal Admar said...

haha your butt is getting bigger or its just about you getting fatter?

well, i've experienced this before with my track suit. it was at my induction course. it didn't make me embarrass as the girls love to see my butt. wonder why.

j or ji said...

muahahaha..
lawak!

aku rasa..mcm pernah jugak kot..masa sekolah..itu normal.

cuma..kalaulah dapat saksikan bau-button due to boobs explosion...

narrowband said...

Sat on staples with bare buttocks? Sounds painful!

suituapui said...

So now we're into backsides, eh? Hahahahahahaha!!!!

kyliemc said...

lol... so far so good..no such kind of experience before... i guess it's really embarrassing but oh well accidents do happen when you least expected...

HuntressMoon said...

mwhahahahaha.. gosh that must have been some view if i were there to see.

Purple~MushRooM said...

This is funny. Haha! I do not have 'touch-wood' any bau-tai situation but I do have very embarassing moments... the lady type. I guess its as bad as bau tai.

Lesson learnt from bau-tai stories ... wear a nice panty. Haha!

Fi-sha said...

Dear Zewt, i just had bau-button moment on friday. had my kebaya pendek on and forgot to done my brooch - to further secure the buttons. i was asking question during a division briefing and suddenly 2 of the buttons popped open, showing my tummy. Yikes! thank god for the handouts that i used to cover my bare flesh and attempted to snap back the buttons. throughout the day, this bau-button moments haunted me that i stapled in between the buttons. That was the worst day in my working life and on top of that i was to meet my schoolmates after office. Shish...i vowed not to wear that kebaya again.

Huei said...

hahahaha well compare being seen in ur full bao tai pants n erm..ur experience of sitting down on the staples..i think the latter is better =P

bao button..well i had lut button la..it's loose edi...but i always have something underneath...thank god! but my excolleague's button got undone during lunch time in a very full char sat..must be damn paiseh for her

iamthewitch said...

You had me laughing out loud at work! At the CLIMAX part. Haha... Great story to share! :)

Crystalicious said...

at first i thought Bau-Thai was Kuching's Bau town and Thailand.

-

unfortunately, i have no bau thai experience before. nor are my boobs too big to have one. hah.

and no i never had staplers piercing into my ass.

but during a trip to kl and sg, i fell 3 times there.
and when i say fell, i meant face flat on the floor and hurt my foot and i walked like a crippled person for the whole time.

3. bloody. times. (!)

oh thanks for dropping by :)

sooky said...

LOL!... Today's my first day back at work after CNY (unwillingly) and this post certainly helped brighten up my day! :)

Aniston said...

U certainly had me laughing out loud like a mad woman in front of my pc! What an experience huh? Guess the 'staple' incident was more excruciating than the embarrasment of ur 'koyak seluar' experience!
I once had a 'bau button' experience on my dress...and it was right in the centre of the dress and a cm away above my panty! It was embarrasing enough cos I was at a fullmoon party! Guess this kinda experience just make our lives more interesting heh?

jam said...

I haven't had this experience before. And I hope it won't happen in the future. It is such an embarassing thing to happen, I have to say...

missironic said...

Hahahaha..couldn't stop laughing when reading it. It's so hilarious! I do have such "bau-thai" pants last time which I tried to sew it back but, still can opened it up by itself. In the end I gave up and threw the pants away. A bit embarrassing but I still managed to get myself not exposed. I can still imagine you running and sneaking around! hahahaha....

eddy said...

that's hilarous, bao thai is kinda embarassing though, never had such experience haha!! :)

Anonymous said...

no bao tai b4, but worse, ya tat stain frm the 'month month have'...truely embarassing, luckily tat time stay hostel, no luck though as have 2 passby so many classroom, luckily though got 'back-cover' fren...anyway y high school dress is in light blue, which genious design 1 !

btw, my mr fatty encounter dis b4 2, but he dun feel belly embarass lor, he went show his manager the baotai...summore take bus back home with the stapled hole...hehehe

lesson: keep a standby pant at ofis lar, the same with shoes

pinknpurplelizard said...

Think the english expression is "split your pants" ;)

Happened to my dad when he was best man at his friends wedding. Bent over to pick up something and rip. Hehe... Luckily it was during the rehearsal.

littlepolaris said...

Omg... Hahahahaha.... aaawww zewt is Exposed! ooops. so seems like i'm not the only one sitting around getting fat. =P

zewt said...

lisalicious - hmmm... tyres?? we're talking about pants though.

day-dreamer - actually, no one noticed.

JustinKC - hello there. hahahahahahahahahaha..... most important... what happened after that?

drumsticks - then what lah?

Acute Critique - wanted to use tai... but thai sounds more authentic.

dy - what a mouthful... not good enough hahaha...

zewt said...

foongpc - errr... why werent u not wearing any underwear???

Crankster - well, at least you dont have the staples bit right?

rinnah - hold it with one hand??? woooaah... must be big eh? hahahahah...

little jennifer - all the time? woooaaah... get more new skirt lah. anyway, i think it can also be used to refer to skirts.

life for beginners - okay... i think someone just blogged about that today... hmmm...

faisal admar - better the girls than the guys right? hahahaha....

zewt said...

j or ji - kalau dapat saksi... bagitahu saya ok?

narrowband - trust me... it was...

suituapui - hehehe... not the way you're thinking though.

kyliemc - must experience it at least once in your lifetime ok?

huntressmoon - no one knew about it.... thank God.

purple mushroom - guys... how nice can it be lah.

zewt said...

fi-sha - kebaya has to be tight isnt it? else it wont be nice...

huei - got undone and unaware? or aware, if aware then ok lah.

iamthewitch - haha... hope it didnt get u into trouble.

Crystalicious - hi there. well, at least u didnt break any bones right? but why the heck u fell so many times?

sooky - i dunno if i shold be happy that my misfortune brightens ppls' days... haha!

Aniston - hello there. well, did you find anything to mend the situation? yeah, such scenarios will be implanted into our memory bank forever.

zewt said...

jam - hahaha... it will come....

missironic - it will make u feel like a secret agent haha.

eddy - good for u mate.

anon @ 3/2 1.39pm - hahaha... the way you described your mr fatty was hilarious...

pinknpurlelizard - hahahaha... indeed... thank God it was only rehearsal.

littlepolaris - as long as you're sitting, u will always be getting fat! hah!

little jennifer said...

>.< i wear short denim skirt lar (shopping lar) ...>.< school then long jeans all the time...^^

missironic said...

Hahaha..FBI in making! :P

Huei said...

unaware! i think she walked over to order with the button undone..then when she came back i realized n told her..btw she's got big assets ;P

foongpc said...

I never wear underwear when I was a small kid. Only started wearing them in my teens : )

zewt said...

little jennifer - denim skirt... wooaah... how to bao a denim skirt!

missironic - jeng jeng jeng...

huei - hahaha... and you were eyeing her assets eh?

foongpc - wah liao!!