Acts of reflection and sincerity of love --- the evolution

It is Chinese custom for the groom to pick up the bride on the wedding date as a symbolic act of bringing the bride back to the groom’s dwelling place. This custom is called “jip san leong” (pick the bride). When the groom reaches the bride’s place, it is also customary for the groom and his comrades (i.e. hend dais) to perform certain acts as a “reflection and sincerity”. These acts are performed based on the instructions from the bride’s comrades… made up of… girls…

So traditionally, the groom, with the help of his comrades were often asked to do things like… write a poem… sing a song… do a dance… shout “I love you” on the top of their lungs. Over time, such sentimental acts evolved into more torturous exercises such as eating fear-factor-like stuff (which the girls will literally stuff it into your mouth and shout “eat, eat, eat!!”), climbing stairs when the bride lives in an apartment (I have done this before) and getting our legs waxed.

Lo and behold, these acts have again evolved. There are no more poem writings and song singing. While the groom and his comrades are still required to endeavour torturous encounters, there is now a new breed of ‘performance’ that needs to put up… new things to do as a ‘reflection and sincerity’ of the groom.

What are they…?

During my “jip san leong” ceremony, I was asked to lie down on the floor and a few of my comrades were asked to do push up… on top of me. This may appear to be an endurance test, as only the ‘prosperous’ guys were chosen. But as most of you may know, when one is tired during push-ups and wants to cheat, one will tend to only push with one’s hip while the hands remain stagnant. Imagine my comrades, pushing with their hips on top of me…

See my friend’s reaction from all the pushing… err… I mean push-ups…
Another one which is fast becoming the “jip san leong” top 10 in recent times is what I call the eat-it-from-his-crotch act. This is when cherries or grapes are strapped onto the groom’s hip with a huge concentration of the chosen fruit on this crotch. Thereafter, the comrades are to eat those fruits without using their hands.

Cherries and grapes may be replaced with the ultimate fruit… bananas. This is a tough one as the comrades will be asked not only to eat the bananas, but to peel them first… with their mouth of course. While this is happening, you can actually hear girls giggle behind the scene and occasionally you can hear… “it’s getting up” from the background…

I was part of the “jip-san-leong” contingent early this month and I have to say, there was this particular act really came up top. After doing some stuff which include eating wasabi-filled biscuits off a guy’s mouth, passing a slice of seed-weed around with our mouth and dancing around in thongs (worn on top of our pants lah, what were you thinking?)… 8 guys were chosen (and thank God I was not one of them).

Next, I saw the girls came out with eggs placed inside plastic bags, those which the hawkers used to pack food. These plastic bags filled with 2 eggs were then strapped around the guys waste with the bags covering the crotch. Yes, the crotch is indeed girls’ centre of attention. So guys, don’t feel guilty if boobs is the centre of your attention.

The chosen ones are to break the eggs without the use of their hands or touch any other thing. Well, there’s a consolation… they can touch each other. Due to the location of those eggs, kicking is out of the question. 2 chosen ones attempted the frontal humping movement but the eggs refused to give way, the impact just isn’t strong enough. That’s when I heard “backside lah… backside lah” coming from the girls… let’s just say I am so glad I was not chosen.

So... we can conclude that based on the latest trend of actions that the girls want guys to do as a “reflection and sincerity” of the groom’s love… a guy should try not to use the hands and master the art of doing things with the mouth. But one thing for sure, I am sure the bride wouldn’t want the groom to break his eggs.

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Have a lovely weekend!